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What is Weird Navigator?

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Posted 08-06-2020 at 03:09 AM by TrivialMorose
Updated 08-06-2020 at 06:32 AM by TrivialMorose

Hey there, bots.

I've been meaning to post some of my writing on this blog, but I've been putting it off. I'm scared and I keep procrastinating.

It would be a really huge leap to actually do it. Easier said than done, and so on.

I'm not entirely sure of all the reasons that are holding me back on this, but at least part of it stems from that...

I am ashamed of them.

Yes, indeed, I am very ashamed of the stories I write. I know they're not worth much. I know how they're much too juvenile, and derivative, and cliche, and badly written and overall weak. I can see all that, and it sickens me.

Part of it is that this doesn't feel very substantial, really. I don't think I have any other readers here besides bots. It's a bummer, really. This is such a beautiful site. I don't get why there are no users here.

Why do everybody prefer something like Fecesbook to this? I mean just look at this site and picture in your mind, that white and blue alternative with it's thumb ups and your mom writing on your wall or whatever... Why?

Okay... I've digressed enough.

A huge part of it is, that it's sort of admitting defeat. Sort of admitting that I will never be a writer, that my writings are not good enough to seriously ever be published. It's enforcing the notion of what a loser I am. Which is the truth, but rubbing one's face in it is no fun...

...

Today I came up with a whole new story. I haven't had new ideas for a while, so that was pretty fun. I spent a couple hours outlining it and making first drafts of a couple scenes.

Then I spent several more hours making a rewrite of some old scene, which still keeps sucking.

But at least I was productive today! More productive than I've been since I wrote that one short story for a submission call more than a month ago.

Aaaand I'm still not showing you anything. I'll keep procrastinating. See you tomorrow on a new post, I think.

***

"Is that very important to you, what critics say, or what readers think?"
"I won't lie. Audiences are nice. So are royalty checks."
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