Hello Boys and Girls! I Hate my Love Life.

I finally got up the nerve to ask out the guy I like and he said no. Not just any no a whole it's-not-you-it's-me talk. I wanted to stab myself through the eye with what ever sharp object was closet. Maybe if it was long enough, it could have gone through my brain. I hated myself so much at that moment. I skipped two classes just to ask him, too. I have never skipped a class in my life!
I am almost happy I will most likely never see him again.
I feel so stupid. What possessed me to think there was even a chance of him saying yes? That there was a chance he liked me too? I am so stupid. I should know better by now. I never seem to learn. People like me are not meant for "Haply Ever After". It is foolish to think anything else.
He told me that he was not interested in going out with anybody; that he had been jaded by some really bad relationships. (They really were bad. He told me about them while he was saying no.)
All I want to do is go home and mope for the rest of the weekend, but I have an English paper that is due on Sunday I have not even started.
It is so unfair. How am I going to think about the paper when I just had my heart cut out with a spoon? Okay, that is a little over dramatic, but no less true.
It was so hard acting like I did not care; that I did not want to run away to find a quiet place to cry. That it was okay that he said no. That I was not hurt. That I was not let down.
I always knew it was possible for him to say no, but it was awful when he did. I should be used to it by now.
I know he tried to be nice about it, but still...
What to do now?
I did not want to date anyone else either until I met him. I wanted nothing more to do with love. I did not want any part in it. I did not want to be hurt again.
Look where that got me. Look where reaching out got me. Look what happened when I trusted another person with my heart.
More pain. That is all it got me.
I do not want to do this again.