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Paranoia, children and grandchildren

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Posted 03-20-2009 at 09:52 PM by HumanePain

Contrary emotions flutter their leathery wings in the night over my bed as I lay awake, staring at the ceiling:

Every parent wants to see their children grow up and leave the nest, and to part on happy and loving terms.

But every grandparent loves to see their grandchildren and to spend time with them.

So when my daughter moves out, and takes her son (my grandson) with her, I am glad to see her leave (not glad in the sense of animosity, but in pride), but I am sad to see my grandson go too.

The Big Bat: WORRY.

Will she get drunk and allow harm to come to the little one? Will he be ok? I fear for him, knowing that she is in a part of life that I went through, knowing that this is where some major mistakes can be made, and I would hate to see my grandson become collateral damage.

I know my daughter would never intentionally harm her son, she loves him dearly and I see ample proof of that.

But she does tend to drink when not under my roof (because now she is free of my "tyrannical" rules against alcohol in my home), and then she seems to "make up for it" when away.

I have seen her drinking leave her bruised and abused then next day. If that happens to her, what could happen to her 2 year old son? What could happen to my only grandson?

I have discussed my fears with her, and reminded her of her past mistakes and emphasized the possible negative impact to her son. She knows I simply desire safety for my grandson, but she also interprets this as "she can't do anything right" and as my rejection of her. This is not so, but I suppose in my worry I come across as saying she is an incompetent mother.

Well, any intoxicated mother would be incompetent to take care of a child.

The Bat bares its teeth and smiles, revealing fangs that might suck joy and happiness from my heart and soul, and from my bond with my only daughter.
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