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-   -   Please be nice to me, I'm sensitive (https://www.gothic.net/boards/showthread.php?t=16267)

Alan 09-29-2009 05:28 PM

Please be nice to me, I'm sensitive
 
1. What do you do?
I mooch off from my parents whom I hate to death for not letting me wear white face paint when we go out to the Olive Garden. I'm totally an artist and I've written three journals of dark poetry that my friends like. I might write a book about darkness because that's such a deep subject.

2. Where are you from?
Hell. Am I goth yet?

3. Who is your favorite author?
I only read Edgar Allan Poe for American Lit but I'm going to say that I read too much to answer this question. You'd think with all the shitload of books I claim to read I would know there's a difference between Octavio Paz and Anne Rice, but no, I want to show off.

4. What are your favorite films?
Last movie I rented was Underworld, but I'm into film noir movies. Those are like Dracula and shit, right?

5. What music do you want played at your wedding?
Some shitty black drone viking electrometal no one in my family will enjoy. Lucky half of them won't bother showing up.

6. At your funeral?
I won't have a funeral. I'M A VAMPIRE!

7. This IS a gothic website, so... how do you want to die?
I want to die beautifully.
oh
my
god
I'm so deep

8. What kind of casket would you want?
I want the blackest of blacks, with velvet lining softer than a baby's scrotum (that's soft!) and the lyrics of Bela Lugosi's Dead engraved in gold, with marble handles and a compartment for wine.
Basically, fuck my family, I want them to pay for a casket more expensive than our house.

9. What's your FAVORITE outfit?
Something victorian with my bowler hat that makes me sweat off a pound and a half every summer day. It's ok though, because this is me
http://celebritydeath.files.wordpres...y-el-gordo.jpg


10. What's one thing you miss about being a little kid?
In reality, that my parents didn't wonder what they did wrong. But I'm going to say I miss the bliss of ignorance. Clichés can be so inspiring.

11. What's your favorite band?
Again, I will say they're too many to name because I'm too insecure to actually mention my tastes and you disapprove of them. It's okay though; I DO have shitty tastes and you SHOULD disapprove, so it's better that I don't say anything.

12. What kind of education do you have?
I feel I waste my time in school. I'm so above such a conformist factory. That's why I'm a straight C high school junior.

13. Why did you join?
I feel people will understand the darkness within me. I was also looking for tips on how to look like a bigger piece of shit and this thread by a certain Catch popped up.

14. If the first 13 questions didn't give it away. What is your gender?
I'm bisexual! Aren't I special?

korinna5555 09-29-2009 05:31 PM

Bored much?

Saya 09-29-2009 05:32 PM

This made me laugh pretty hard, for some reason since its coming from Alan its even funnier.

Duane 09-29-2009 05:39 PM

Z-O-M-G! Troll!!! We must shun the troll, it's dealing damage to our subculture that's practically dead... but it's all we got!!! St. Andrew! St Peter! Save us from this beast!

korinna5555 09-29-2009 05:42 PM

You mean St. Andi and St. JohnnySlut, right?
ANDREW AND PETER JUST AREN'T GOTH ENOUGH.

Underwater Ophelia 09-29-2009 05:44 PM

You spelled Edgar Allan Poe's name correctly, you failure.

Duane 09-29-2009 05:51 PM

Well... I... instead of sounding like a true "goth", I have been found as nothing more than a baby bat who saw the names of Andrew and Peter on this board... well... instead of doing the intelligent thing and conceding to a clearly superior opponent... I will resort to ridiculous insults in attempt to save myself from looking too stupid, while showing myself to be stupider... you cunt bubble.

korinna5555 09-29-2009 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duane (Post 568080)
you cunt bubble.

You're a cum dumpster, Duane.


=D

Duane 09-29-2009 06:06 PM

Yeah... well... you're a poo monster the size of Texas... and you smell... bad! I's witty *chortle* ^_^

korinna5555 09-29-2009 06:09 PM

A poo monster the size of Texas? I though that was Jin?! *is confused*

Duane 09-29-2009 06:15 PM

This thread reminds me of Ducky.

korinna5555 09-29-2009 06:19 PM

Aww, now you made me go and start missing him. AGAIN. D:

SiouxsiePernova 09-29-2009 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by korinna5555 (Post 568078)
You mean St. Andi and St. JohnnySlut, right?
ANDREW AND PETER JUST AREN'T GOTH ENOUGH.

Are they the patron saints of drawn-on eyebrows?

korinna5555 09-29-2009 06:33 PM

YES INDEED.[blah]

HumanePain 09-29-2009 07:18 PM

OK, now it really creeps me out that you know how soft a baby's scrotum is, care to explain?

Lolly PopMuzik 09-30-2009 02:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alan (Post 568070)
9. What's your FAVORITE outfit?
Something victorian with my bowler hat that makes me sweat off a pound and a half every summer day. It's ok though, because this is me
http://celebritydeath.files.wordpres...y-el-gordo.jpg

...You forgot to note that even with the sweating, most of them are still fatter than holy hell.

Cicero 09-30-2009 02:27 AM

A+ for accuracy. Seriously.

Still Jack 09-30-2009 02:35 AM

Shit son. How did I miss this? This thread is epic.

Mir 09-30-2009 02:48 AM

This thread just reminds me of how much I really miss Duckie.

Corpsey 09-30-2009 03:12 AM

This made me miss 2007 when Alan/Jillian was active 24/7. Like how he would constantly rave on about Lacrimosa and talk about how he temp dyed his hair with light blue paint and put pins in his pants for fun. Methinks he got a life. Or a girl.

Alan 09-03-2011 04:38 PM

This thread should be stickied to piss off the ugly noobs.

Vince 09-03-2011 06:11 PM

We should just make you all sticky to piss off everyone.

That would be funner.

Grausamkeit 09-03-2011 07:14 PM

Jill, I knew you were a fucking perv! :eek: I bet you know what monkey spooge takes like, too!

Who wants to bet most of the n00bz reading this stickied wouldn't get it. Like the genius who posted griping about the stickied thread up there^?

HumanePain 09-03-2011 10:04 PM

BWUHAHAHA! I had forgotten about this, gave me the best laugh today!
Oliver looks like he's a perky goth.

Apathy's_Child 09-04-2011 10:15 AM

Yo Jilly, how do your militant hippie politics of tolerance & inclusion jive with the continual bigotry you exhibit towards people you decide are phycially unattractive?

Serious question. And something I've wondered about many times over the years, before anyone decides I'm just overreacting to a throwaway jokey comment.


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