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Search took 0.30 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: gothicusmaximus
Forum: Music 01-02-2013, 11:34 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 788
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I like 'the wrong crowd' best one we have so...

I like 'the wrong crowd'
best one we have so far is 'at the time of his kidnapping'
Forum: Politics 12-29-2012, 11:07 AM
Replies: 345
Views: 5,729
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Remember Dirty Harry? Basically this guy the...

Remember Dirty Harry? Basically this guy the Scorpio Killer is on a sniping spree; Clint Eastwood totally has his number, but is flummoxed by pesky Miranda rights and constitutional provisions...
Forum: Music 12-10-2012, 10:35 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 788
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Goth band names go

not of existing goth bands, new ones
Forum: Politics 10-11-2012, 12:54 AM
Replies: 285
Views: 4,660
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I forgot something. Speaking of Stalinist Russia,...

I forgot something. Speaking of Stalinist Russia, The Master and Margarita is a great book. You should all check it out, if you haven't already. It's goffik.
Forum: Politics 10-11-2012, 12:40 AM
Replies: 285
Views: 4,660
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Is it really beyond your ken, Versus? I think an...

Is it really beyond your ken, Versus? I think an analogy to the early Soviet period is apt, if I may say so without shaming the memory of the millions who perished by purge, pogrom, and ill-conceived...
Forum: Politics 07-25-2012, 10:13 PM
Replies: 25
Views: 2,577
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I remember everything ...

I remember everything
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fnh6bY3E1yA&feature=related
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 11-08-2011, 12:02 PM
Replies: 28
Views: 3,070
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I have an Ecco the Dolphin ROM on my computer....

I have an Ecco the Dolphin ROM on my computer. Dolphins fucking rule.
Forum: Whining 11-08-2011, 11:49 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 2,351
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Roommate trouble

Two new roommates moved in with me last week. From what I can ascertain, one is an out-of-work graphic designer cum amateur Flamenco dancer, the other is an engineering grad student at MIT, and both...
Forum: Whining 11-01-2011, 08:31 PM
Replies: 29
Views: 2,184
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yale? I wouldn't be caught dead at old Eli's...

Yale? I wouldn't be caught dead at old Eli's trade school. Veritas, bitches.

But who the hell are you and whence comes this distorted knowledge of my life? Did my senile grandma get on here and...
Forum: Whining 10-31-2011, 01:52 PM
Replies: 29
Views: 2,184
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You better work on that attitude before Jesus...

You better work on that attitude before Jesus comes back.
Forum: Whining 10-31-2011, 03:39 AM
Replies: 29
Views: 2,184
Posted By gothicusmaximus
God, I fucking miss Gothic.net. Where else can I...

God, I fucking miss Gothic.net. Where else can I find "at least until the new year(Xian, not Pagan)"?
Forum: Whining 01-15-2011, 02:13 AM
Replies: 36
Views: 2,328
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Used to have these fucks too. It was hell. I fell...

Used to have these fucks too. It was hell. I fell to my knees and wept when at last we routed them. For a while I thought they were just going to slowly eat me.
Forum: Politics 11-02-2010, 07:30 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 856
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Is it just me...

or are they all drunk on MSNBC right now?
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 10-21-2010, 10:42 PM
Replies: 4,551
Views: 532,799
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Enter the Void. Great date movie.

Enter the Void. Great date movie.
Forum: General 10-07-2010, 01:14 AM
Replies: 58
Views: 2,982
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Identify something you like about a moron

We tend to dehumanize the frequent targets of ridicule here on gothic.net, forgetting that these members, with perhaps some notable exceptions, are nuanced individuals who demonstrate at the very...
Forum: General 10-07-2010, 12:52 AM
Replies: 7,623
Sticky: Picture Post 2
Views: 523,065
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Anarasha, fucking keep your head shaven....

Anarasha, fucking keep your head shaven. Seriously, with the buzz cut your appearance suggests a basement-dwelling, mouth-breathing replica pistol collector, and your long hair makes even that look...
Forum: Spooky News 09-28-2010, 03:08 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 1,352
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Maybe OnyxBat is a troll.

Maybe OnyxBat is a troll.
Forum: Fashion 09-28-2010, 07:13 AM
Replies: 29
Views: 3,647
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I just saw someone walking down the street...

I just saw someone walking down the street wearing this shirt.
Forum: Whining 09-26-2010, 08:05 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Mad Men is too good. It's infuriatingly good. ITS...

Mad Men is too good. It's infuriatingly good. ITS QUALITY IS... MADDENING.
Forum: General 09-26-2010, 07:50 AM
Replies: 385
Views: 11,877
Posted By gothicusmaximus
This. Despanan, you're hacking at the branches....

This. Despanan, you're hacking at the branches. Religion isn't the root of human stupidity. Human stupidity is the root of religion.
History has shown that people, when seeking justification for a...
Forum: General 09-25-2010, 11:33 AM
Replies: 77
Views: 4,774
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm throwing a party, the theme of which is the...

I'm throwing a party, the theme of which is the vague dread of graduating college and hurtling toward an uncertain future. In that spirit, I think I'm going to dress as an alcoholic lawyer.
Forum: Whining 09-24-2010, 06:49 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 1,268
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Online dating is like D&D-- not inherently for...

Online dating is like D&D-- not inherently for assholes, but powerfully stigmatized. Just as teenagers generally only resort D&D when some already-present, undisguisable defect prevents them from...
Forum: Whining 09-24-2010, 04:37 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 1,268
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Dude, very rarely does anyone remain friends with...

Dude, very rarely does anyone remain friends with an ex, save in the most superficial sense.
Don't beat yourself up over it. Now that you're single, you should focus on a different kind of beating....
Forum: Whining 09-23-2010, 02:49 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Federal tax benefits for married couples are...

Federal tax benefits for married couples are social engineering, plain and simple. Private enterprises really should be permitted to discriminate either, but the practices of such enterprises are...
Forum: Fashion 09-22-2010, 08:54 PM
Replies: 29
Views: 3,647
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I stand corrected, though I do believe the...

I stand corrected, though I do believe the restrictions exist to ensure that the National Mall continues looking majestic.



Swinging, while admittedly possible, would nevertheless be way lamer...
Forum: Fashion 09-22-2010, 11:20 AM
Replies: 29
Views: 3,647
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You know, I was thinking the other day-- what if...

You know, I was thinking the other day-- what if Spider-Man lived in Washington, D.C? There would be way more crime to fight, but nothing really on which to web swing, as no structure is permitted to...
Forum: General 09-19-2010, 09:37 AM
Replies: 11
Views: 952
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I like this guy. Usually people who own swords...

I like this guy. Usually people who own swords have pretensions of adherence to bushido or some antiquated honor code, but this dude is totally down to take PCP, strap on a bulletproof vest, and hide...
Forum: General 09-19-2010, 09:20 AM
Replies: 17
Views: 1,084
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I hate 'artists'. Also, Life of Pi...

I hate 'artists'.

Also,


Life of Pi is pretty good. I like that book.
Forum: General 09-16-2010, 02:24 PM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I would totally do this. 50/hour and free clothes...

I would totally do this. 50/hour and free clothes to cuddle with some lesbian? Too bad I don't live in Dallas.
Forum: General 09-14-2010, 02:45 PM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Aethling, your most recent post muddles two...

Aethling, your most recent post muddles two concepts. I acknowledged that morality is entirely based on feelings, that what one considers 'good' proceeds directly from what makes him feel good....
Forum: General 09-12-2010, 12:18 PM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I know that, in the Bible, there can be no...

I know that, in the Bible, there can be no salvation without faith, and I know that the Bible instructs Christians to expect persecution and ridicule. The question, however, remains: why do you...
Forum: General 09-11-2010, 05:38 PM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Explain why belief in your god is more legitimate...

Explain why belief in your god is more legitimate than belief in my unicorn bigfoot.



You must acknowledge, then, that your faith is wholly independent of logic, and based entirely on...
Forum: General 09-11-2010, 01:32 PM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Your position is illogical. As gothic.net's...

Your position is illogical. As gothic.net's dedicated but swiftly shrinking bloc of reasonable members has explained countless times, logic correlates absence of evidence with evidence of absence. ...
Forum: Whining 09-11-2010, 12:35 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Bitch leaves full glass of water by the side of...

Bitch leaves full glass of water by the side of the bed.
I get up to go to the bathroom, and knock the glass over. It spills on my belt, damaging the leather.
My face....
Forum: Fashion 09-08-2010, 08:55 PM
Replies: 21
Views: 2,374
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I think this is the first time gothic.net has...

I think this is the first time gothic.net has ever accomplished something actually positive.
Forum: Fashion 09-07-2010, 09:08 AM
Replies: 21
Views: 2,374
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yes, I'd say you should have mentioned your...

Yes, I'd say you should have mentioned your financial concerns in your original post, but, more importantly, you shouldn't have made your outrageously juvenile, inconsiderate attitude so abundantly...
Forum: Fashion 09-05-2010, 03:52 PM
Replies: 21
Views: 2,374
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Alternatively, you could not selfishly refuse to...

Alternatively, you could not selfishly refuse to indulge your 6-year-old child on fucking Halloween.
Forum: Whining 09-05-2010, 03:46 PM
Replies: 20
Views: 1,759
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I miss her psychotic boyfriend, who called...

I miss her psychotic boyfriend, who called gothic.net a 'batch of fiends', dedicated to 'ruining the world one strain of morality at a time'.
Forum: Whining 08-30-2010, 12:46 PM
Replies: 28
Views: 1,854
Posted By gothicusmaximus
OnyxBat is definitely a genuine idiot. I speak...

OnyxBat is definitely a genuine idiot. I speak from painful experience when I caution that you can't get too hairtrigger with the troll identification, as there was a good three week period for which...
Forum: Whining 08-30-2010, 11:33 AM
Replies: 28
Views: 1,854
Posted By gothicusmaximus
As I see it, the guy took you out for pizza in an...

As I see it, the guy took you out for pizza in an effort to soften the blow of discovering that your pet's life was in danger. You then threw an embarrassingly loud public tantrum about how your...
Forum: Whining 08-28-2010, 10:38 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
What previous comments? I don't recall having...

What previous comments? I don't recall having made any outrageously sexist comments to the effect that women are only of value insofar as one can bone them.
Regardless, that post was just a...
Forum: General 08-27-2010, 12:02 AM
Replies: 25
Views: 1,313
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"oh... it was just a dream. I'm still a...

"oh... it was just a dream. I'm still a paraplegic and I'll never play football again."
Forum: Whining 08-26-2010, 11:42 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I really should try meeting a girl and not having...

I really should try meeting a girl and not having sex with her.
Forum: Spooky News 08-25-2010, 11:20 PM
Replies: 49
Views: 3,765
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I've got something hilarious. ...

I've got something hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaQBrTROj2w

You're all welcome.
Forum: General 08-25-2010, 09:08 PM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yo Despanan. I rolled by your open mic last...

Yo Despanan. I rolled by your open mic last night, but I couldn't find you. After an admittedly short while, I judged that I wasn't getting sufficiently trashed and didn't want to stand next to my...
Forum: General 08-24-2010, 10:28 AM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Don't know much about Crowley Don't know much...

Don't know much about Crowley
Don't know much about Nietzsche
Don't know many philosophy majors
Don't know many psychic new-agers

But I do know that I Existance
And I know if you Existance...
Forum: General 08-24-2010, 08:13 AM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Goddamn, has anyone else noticed that 50% of any...

Goddamn, has anyone else noticed that 50% of any discussion on gnet is composed of attempts to reconcile the well-reasoned position of some members with the groundless hocus pocus of other members by...
Forum: General 08-23-2010, 06:03 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,744
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I have a show at 8:30 tomorrow night. Afterwards...

I have a show at 8:30 tomorrow night. Afterwards I intend to get trashed, and after that I intend to get laid. You guys can possibly join me in the former activity, depending on your plans.
Forum: General 08-23-2010, 05:40 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,744
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm a double major in playwriting actually. ...

I'm a double major in playwriting actually.
TWO MAJORS. TWO THESES. TWO FACULTIES WITH WHOM I HAVE DEVELOPED A RAPPORT. TWO METRIC TONS OF BRAIN MATTER. TWO IN THE GOO ONE IN THE POO.
Forum: General 08-23-2010, 03:58 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,744
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Uh, hey Despanan, it's A PRIORI. Two words, bro. ...

Uh, hey Despanan, it's A PRIORI. Two words, bro.
I should remind you guys that I'm a Classics major. You know, Latin and Greek. That's my major. I take classes in the Classics department. I talk to...
Forum: General 08-20-2010, 08:50 PM
Replies: 272
Views: 9,727
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use...

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
Forum: Whining 08-20-2010, 08:07 AM
Replies: 146
Views: 5,569
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Banning Anarasha is a deed of such sterling...

Banning Anarasha is a deed of such sterling nobility as to more than compensate for any deficiencies in virtue the admin has priorly displayed. Truly, he is a philosopher king.
Forum: Shill 08-19-2010, 12:26 PM
Replies: 20
Views: 2,880
Posted By gothicusmaximus
We genuinely don't know who is responsible. This...

We genuinely don't know who is responsible. This play enjoys widespread popularity within the asshole community.
Regardless, I don't think Weeds' viewership will take a hit.
Forum: Whining 08-19-2010, 12:19 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 803
Posted By gothicusmaximus
A few years ago, my mom picked me up from school...

A few years ago, my mom picked me up from school and asked gravely, "So, what are we going to do?" Observing my confusion, she continued, "You didn't hear?" I said I hadn't. "George Bush was...
Forum: General 08-19-2010, 11:59 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 8,135
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Okay, come the fuck on. He isn't 'scary'. He's a...

Okay, come the fuck on. He isn't 'scary'. He's a totally mundane American President. If you want to say he's doing a substandard job, that's fair, but calling him 'scary' is lowest common denominator...
Forum: General 08-14-2010, 12:57 PM
Replies: 100
Views: 2,632
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Let's you me and Despanan chill next time you're...

Let's you me and Despanan chill next time you're in the East Village.
Forum: General 08-13-2010, 11:28 AM
Replies: 100
Views: 2,632
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Kontan, do you live here now?

Kontan, do you live here now?
Forum: General 08-13-2010, 09:19 AM
Replies: 49
Views: 2,517
Posted By gothicusmaximus
There's nothing pretentious about the term...

There's nothing pretentious about the term 'postmodernism'. If anything, it's the least pretentious of all the words that could be contrived to describe the intellectual and artistic movement that...
Forum: General 08-11-2010, 09:48 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 8,135
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yeah, it's deeply sad, but true. Vyvian is still...

Yeah, it's deeply sad, but true. Vyvian is still a cloying try-hard, only now he imagines himself as a hard-drinking, acerbic badass rather than an anguished poet, which change is arguably for the...
Forum: General 08-10-2010, 03:59 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 563
Posted By gothicusmaximus
No one noticed you were...

No one noticed you were goooooooooooooooooooooooooone...
Forum: General 08-09-2010, 06:53 PM
Replies: 91
Views: 5,049
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Frank Miller is possibly the biggest fuck up of...

Frank Miller is possibly the biggest fuck up of all living artists. Even Roman Polanski, who ***** a tween, will be remembered primarily for Chinatown and Rosemary's Baby, but I have no doubt that,...
Forum: Literature 08-09-2010, 06:33 PM
Replies: 50
Views: 2,485
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That actually is a very annoyingly muddled...

That actually is a very annoyingly muddled metaphor. These are the reasons why The Crow should not be anyone's third-favorite movie.
Forum: Literature 08-07-2010, 05:59 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 897
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Cher Horowitz was totally crushing on the...

Cher Horowitz was totally crushing on the brooding intellectual from her English class-- with his thick eyeliner, black nailpolish, and titillatingly morbid musings. But how could she get his...
Forum: Literature 08-07-2010, 05:16 PM
Replies: 27
Views: 2,398
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Was he an astronaut?

Was he an astronaut?
Forum: General 08-06-2010, 10:09 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm angry with me too.

I'm angry with me too.
Forum: General 08-06-2010, 09:42 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I forgot Anarasha. Oh, Anarasha. I...

I forgot Anarasha.



Oh, Anarasha. I don't think you took Shark Week RPG seriously enough, and that, my friend, was your downfall. You recognize that providing the shark with any means by which...
Forum: General 08-06-2010, 09:29 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
To your shock, the shark is unamused by rubber...

To your shock, the shark is unamused by rubber duckies. It does, however, very much appreciate your waving a stick in its face, as that affords it a way by which to yank you into the tub and eat you....
Forum: Whining 08-06-2010, 08:39 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I actually think this is completely wrong, as far...

I actually think this is completely wrong, as far as larger trends are concerned. While certain writers, like Bendis and Ennis, still seem to maintain that the quality of a superhero comic is...
Forum: Spooky News 08-05-2010, 02:40 PM
Replies: 81
Views: 2,702
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Guys, Tam just doesn't want to see whiny faggots...

Guys, Tam just doesn't want to see whiny faggots on her TV.
Forum: Literature 08-04-2010, 10:22 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 611
Posted By gothicusmaximus
It's like I'm really in the whining section.

It's like I'm really in the whining section.
Forum: Whining 08-04-2010, 10:19 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 1,281
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Be patient until you're seventeen.

Be patient until you're seventeen.
Forum: General 08-04-2010, 08:38 AM
Replies: 103
Views: 6,003
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Overzealous fanboys of any stripe are annoying. ...

Overzealous fanboys of any stripe are annoying.
What bothers me most about this post is the implication that American children should not demonstrate excessive affection for Japanese culture because...
Forum: General 08-04-2010, 08:07 AM
Replies: 52
Views: 2,035
Posted By gothicusmaximus
See, look at that. I never have to actually say...

See, look at that. I never have to actually say it, everyone just knows.
Forum: General 08-04-2010, 08:03 AM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
It took me ten minutes. You're just jealous that...

It took me ten minutes. You're just jealous that you didn't invent Shark Week RPG.
Forum: Spooky News 08-03-2010, 09:14 PM
Replies: 180
Views: 9,299
Posted By gothicusmaximus
GOOD GOTH. All right, I'm done.

GOOD GOTH.
All right, I'm done.
Forum: General 08-03-2010, 09:00 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I need to stop browsing gnet drunk. Of course, I...

I need to stop browsing gnet drunk. Of course, I won't.



Hygiene before safety-- a rewarding outlook if you don't mind a short life. Despite your attempt to respect the murderous beast's...
Forum: Shill 08-03-2010, 08:32 AM
Replies: 20
Views: 2,880
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Ghost of Dracula returns in two weeks, as part of...

Ghost of Dracula returns in two weeks, as part of the New York International Fringe Festival.

http://www.fringenyc.org/basic_page.php?ltr=G#Ghosto

Be it known, this show isn't screwing around...
Forum: General 08-02-2010, 09:49 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That is the vaguest Shark Week roleplaying ever....

That is the vaguest Shark Week roleplaying ever. Clearly you're not feeling sufficiently festive, Alan-- or should I say SCROOGE?
Forum: General 08-02-2010, 09:40 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,056
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Shark Week RPG

You go to take a bath.
There is a fucking shark in the tub.
What do you do?
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 08-02-2010, 08:38 AM
Replies: 31
Views: 2,469
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Assuming Tam and her husband had sex on their...

Assuming Tam and her husband had sex on their wedding night, this thread proves that at least one non-virgin plans to see Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.
My hypothesis is defeated.
Forum: Introductions 07-28-2010, 03:15 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 813
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I like how you responded to the gnet survey...

I like how you responded to the gnet survey questions as if they were posed by mom and dad, who don't understand you.
Forum: Fashion 07-27-2010, 09:19 AM
Replies: 163
Views: 16,743
Posted By gothicusmaximus
What the fuck is this "^" shit? What's wrong with...

What the fuck is this "^" shit? What's wrong with quoting? I can barely tell to whom the fuck anyone is talking.



The question of whether wearing it upsets her and the question of whether...
Forum: Fashion 07-27-2010, 09:01 AM
Replies: 163
Views: 16,743
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yes. That's the point. She's saying that no...

Yes. That's the point. She's saying that no matter what clothes she wears, she's still a Rivethead. To her, Rivethead is a 'way of life', and sure, that's fucking exceptionally stupid, but I suppose...
Forum: Whining 07-27-2010, 08:31 AM
Replies: 45
Views: 2,653
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I lol'd pretty hard.

I lol'd pretty hard.
Forum: General 07-24-2010, 01:32 PM
Replies: 103
Views: 6,003
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I had to Walk of Shame it today with the worst...

I had to Walk of Shame it today with the worst bedhead ever. My hair was standing straight up. I'm jus' Saiyan.
Forum: General 07-22-2010, 09:52 AM
Replies: 96
Views: 3,492
Posted By gothicusmaximus
All right, I guess I didn't take into account the...

All right, I guess I didn't take into account the possibility that you guys would be so willfully ignorant. Carry on then.
As it happens, I'm actually starting to like this troll. His posts about...
Forum: General 07-21-2010, 09:23 PM
Replies: 96
Views: 3,492
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Look, it's ape descendant, a certified genuine...

Look, it's ape descendant, a certified genuine idiot. Gang up on her instead-- because when it comes to mouth-breathers, there's no substitute for the real deal.
Forum: General 07-21-2010, 03:07 PM
Replies: 96
Views: 3,492
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You are responding to fabricated stupidity as you...

You are responding to fabricated stupidity as you would to real stupidity, i.e. with tired facepalm images. You have two options:
1. You are stupid and got trolled, whether you enjoyed it or not....
Forum: General 07-21-2010, 02:49 PM
Replies: 96
Views: 3,492
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm in awe. I am absolutely staggered by how...

I'm in awe.
I am absolutely staggered by how fucking stupid you people are.
Do you not realize that ssj_goku is laughing his ass off at all of you right now? Do you not realize that, in becoming...
Forum: General 07-20-2010, 06:34 PM
Replies: 174
Views: 6,202
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Alan, as I said, one needn't subscribe to the...

Alan, as I said, one needn't subscribe to the notion of a 'dominant' species, but if you do, you must concede that human beings are that species. By what criteria would we not be? Any intelligence...
Forum: General 07-20-2010, 05:26 PM
Replies: 96
Views: 3,492
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Everyone under this line has been trolled. ...

Everyone under this line has been trolled.
_____________________________________________________
Forum: General 07-20-2010, 01:50 PM
Replies: 174
Views: 6,202
Posted By gothicusmaximus
If you subscribe to the idea that one species is...

If you subscribe to the idea that one species is dominant on Earth, that species is homo sapiens, no question.
Are people seriously suggesting that because one Lion can kill a human being, lions...
Forum: Whining 07-20-2010, 09:28 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
As a counterpoint to my post in 'what's made your...

As a counterpoint to my post in 'what's made your day', my earlier bedbug bites continue be hideous and itch.
Forum: General 07-20-2010, 09:18 AM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm off to a good start because, for the first...

I'm off to a good start because, for the first time in like a week, I've awoken without immediately discovering a new, inflamed bedbug bite.
Forum: Whining 07-19-2010, 01:22 PM
Replies: 167
Views: 6,183
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Kontan, I'm afraid I just don't find it...

Kontan, I'm afraid I just don't find it conceivable that you're cat-called as frequently as is even a moderately attractive woman. Maybe you're an Adonis whose sublime beauty inspires all who look...
Forum: Whining 07-19-2010, 12:24 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I just thought of a way to make reading gnet...

I just thought of a way to make reading gnet twice as interesting: pretend Duckman is masturbating furiously whenever he posts.

On second thought, what I mean to say is that I just realized...
Forum: Whining 07-16-2010, 01:58 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I've had my heart broken, Apathy. Her name... was...

I've had my heart broken, Apathy. Her name... was Itchy. We were in love.
Forum: Whining 07-16-2010, 01:16 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Ben, I have to say I really do appreciate your...

Ben, I have to say I really do appreciate your effort to break shit down in a manner comprehensible to these people. I was tempted to do the same many times, but foolishly chose instead to continue...
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 07-16-2010, 12:47 PM
Replies: 4,551
Views: 532,799
Posted By gothicusmaximus
It's like witnessing the invention of the modern...

It's like witnessing the invention of the modern action-thriller. Uniquely cerebral, peerlessly intense, and more rewardingly complex than most psychodramas.
You should definitely check it out,...
Forum: Whining 07-16-2010, 07:51 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Goddamnit, JCC. Now that you've posted, he's...

Goddamnit, JCC. Now that you've posted, he's finally going to realize, as he somehow hasn't yet, that you and Duckman aren't one person, and the walls of his psyche are going to collapse completely....
Forum: Whining 07-16-2010, 02:26 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Gothic.net: capturing nervous breakdowns in text...

Gothic.net: capturing nervous breakdowns in text form since 1995.

Upon reflection, I have to admit that seeing some very probably drunk kid pound out an essay-length argument of the totally moot...
Forum: Whining 07-16-2010, 01:52 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Ho. Lee. Shit. My instinct is to respond at...

Ho. Lee. Shit.
My instinct is to respond at length to the above torrent of pure, not-from-concentrate insanity, but I honestly don't think I could say anything about it that it doesn't say more...
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 07-16-2010, 01:27 AM
Replies: 4,551
Views: 532,799
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Inception. My mind is fucking blown.

Inception. My mind is fucking blown.
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 12:31 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Thankfully, my building covers the exterminator....

Thankfully, my building covers the exterminator. I just hope he doesn't make me get a new mattress.
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 12:30 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 907
Posted By gothicusmaximus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDAmPIq29ro

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDAmPIq29ro
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 12:18 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I don't think the knowledge that one is smarter...

I don't think the knowledge that one is smarter than most everybody on gothic.net would be much of a balm for low self-esteem. I mean, big fucking whoop.
I just like disparaging people of inferior...
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 12:06 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I think you're confusing 'always here' with...

I think you're confusing 'always here' with 'presently here'. In fact, another desperate moron, very much like yourself, grasping in vain for a grounds on which to suggest that I'm not best...
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 11:55 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I will mix things up with a succinct attack on...

I will mix things up with a succinct attack on not only your intelligence, but also your sandy vagina.

Also, don't you think 'opponents' is kind of an excessively flattering...
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 11:47 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Gothic.net, I HAVE BED BUGS.

Gothic.net, I HAVE BED BUGS.
Forum: Whining 07-15-2010, 11:04 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
If you were about eight times smarter than you...

If you were about eight times smarter than you are, and not constantly mired in the saccharine haze of your delusion that every individual and idea, no matter how effervescently retarded, deserves...
Forum: Whining 07-14-2010, 08:49 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Really? A sensible female would interpret "hit it...

Really? A sensible female would interpret "hit it and quit it" to mean not "I enjoy protected sex outside of a relationship, with partners who do not expect that I will have sex with them a second...
Forum: Whining 07-14-2010, 12:14 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Wait, where? I thoroughly combed all of ape...

Wait, where? I thoroughly combed all of ape descendant's posts for the hidden joke, or any clue at all that she might be a sentient being rather than a beady-eyed, slack-jawed grotesque, howling in...
Forum: General 07-14-2010, 11:58 AM
Replies: 7,623
Sticky: Picture Post 2
Views: 523,065
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That's magical.

That's magical.
Forum: Whining 07-14-2010, 08:51 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yeah, would that I could just flip a switch and...

Yeah, would that I could just flip a switch and become you. I can only imagine what a joy it is to post things like the things you post and not be mortified, or to read things like the things you...
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 07-13-2010, 12:23 PM
Replies: 108
Views: 16,197
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Is someone implying that the first four seasons...

Is someone implying that the first four seasons of the X-Files aren't exceptional television?
Forum: Whining 07-12-2010, 06:25 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
apparently fucking so.

apparently fucking so.
Forum: General 07-12-2010, 02:46 PM
Replies: 7,623
Sticky: Picture Post 2
Views: 523,065
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Hey Jillian, is that a real redhead? If so, did...

Hey Jillian, is that a real redhead? If so, did you boff her? I've always wanted to do a redhead.
Forum: Whining 07-12-2010, 11:22 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Is this the kind of commitment issue where she's...

Is this the kind of commitment issue where she's hideous and desiccates your boner? I have that too.
Forum: Whining 07-12-2010, 11:14 AM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm curious to know as well. If this forum were...

I'm curious to know as well. If this forum were hosted at icanneverliveanormallifeaftermyheadinjury.net, I might assume that ape descendant had somehow failed to perceive as a joke the statement...
Forum: Whining 07-10-2010, 02:16 PM
Replies: 21
Views: 1,055
Posted By gothicusmaximus
So really you don't hate the word 'maybe'. You...

So really you don't hate the word 'maybe'. You hate that no one wants to hang out with you, and that people try to be nice about it.
Forum: Whining 07-09-2010, 10:35 PM
Replies: 126
Views: 5,933
Posted By gothicusmaximus
There you have it, folks. WOMEN ARE BIOLOGICALLY...

There you have it, folks. WOMEN ARE BIOLOGICALLY PROGRAMMED TO REWARD CRUELTY, EVIL, AND DOMINATION (http://www.gothic.net/boards/showthread.php?t=22501).

Seriously though, the lessons of my...
Forum: Whining 07-09-2010, 10:23 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
My roommate is boring and goes to bed at midnight...

My roommate is boring and goes to bed at midnight like a chump.
Forum: Fashion 07-07-2010, 01:50 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 2,856
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You know, I think I'd be reluctant to allow...

You know, I think I'd be reluctant to allow anyone who 'gothed up' their scrubs to do so much as take my blood pressure.
Forum: Fashion 07-07-2010, 11:45 AM
Replies: 163
Views: 16,743
Posted By gothicusmaximus
like a baus

like a baus
Forum: General 07-07-2010, 10:40 AM
Replies: 5,220
Views: 252,767
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I had a total IIII'MMMMM REAEEEEEAAAAAAAALLY...

I had a total IIII'MMMMM REAEEEEEAAAAAAAALLY PLEEEEEAAAAAAASED BYYY THIIIIIS moment.
Forum: Literature 07-07-2010, 01:06 AM
Replies: 60
Views: 5,949
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Those last two posts made me consider what I've...

Those last two posts made me consider what I've never considered before: just leaving this forum and never coming back.
Forum: Introductions 07-07-2010, 01:00 AM
Replies: 8
Views: 760
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You're a psycho.

You're a psycho.
Forum: Whining 07-05-2010, 12:54 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Oh, yes, I forgot about this. 'And their...

Oh, yes, I forgot about this. 'And their machines' is appended to pretty much every mention of the fire nation, e.g. "then came the fire nation... AND THEIR MACHINES."
Forum: Whining 07-04-2010, 12:38 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
This film truly was an achievement. Indeed, M....

This film truly was an achievement. Indeed, M. Night possesses a discipline unmatched by any contemporary writer, for each line of his script has been painstakingly stripped of any drama-- any...
Forum: General 07-04-2010, 10:41 AM
Replies: 25
Views: 1,532
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Spending today eating KFC, drinking Samuel Adams,...

Spending today eating KFC, drinking Samuel Adams, and trying to set the high score on Custer's Revenge. MERICUH.



Political and economic entropy doesn't end in anarcho-communism. An...
Forum: Literature 07-04-2010, 01:45 AM
Replies: 27
Views: 2,398
Posted By gothicusmaximus
the first two stanzas are trite and completely...

the first two stanzas are trite and completely unnecessary.
The third stanza at least contains a poetic idea, albeit a tired one. The language with which you develop that idea needs to be more...
Forum: Literature 07-04-2010, 01:26 AM
Replies: 31
Views: 2,076
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I like that idea that to refrain from beginning a...

I like that idea that to refrain from beginning a piece of prose with fucking 'once upon a time' is a secret technique known only to 'professional writers'.
Forum: Whining 07-03-2010, 05:47 PM
Replies: 30
Views: 3,639
Posted By gothicusmaximus
The profound shame of having ever been concerned...

The profound shame of having ever been concerned with this juvenile, completely fabricated clash of equally idiotic subcultures will weigh upon you all for the entirety of your adult lives.
Forum: Music 07-03-2010, 12:51 AM
Replies: 18
Views: 2,665
Posted By gothicusmaximus
FUCKIN MAGNETS ...

FUCKIN MAGNETS
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-agl0pOQfs
Forum: Whining 07-03-2010, 12:43 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Dancing is the worst activity. Why is this part...

Dancing is the worst activity. Why is this part of civilization at all?
Forum: General 07-01-2010, 02:59 PM
Replies: 91
Views: 5,049
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Every comic book superhero of note has gone...

Every comic book superhero of note has gone through dozens of costume changes. They never last.
Forum: Introductions 07-01-2010, 02:43 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 833
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Frosted Flakes: they're more than assault. ...

Frosted Flakes: they're more than assault.
They're rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrape!
Forum: Spooky News 06-28-2010, 02:39 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 696
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I am so fucking sick of zombies.

I am so fucking sick of zombies.
Forum: Whining 06-27-2010, 06:13 PM
Replies: 33
Views: 1,384
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Though skeptical, I am pulling for xjin to...

Though skeptical, I am pulling for xjin to suddenly be overwhelmed by vivd memory of her life as a slightly less irritating person.
Forum: Whining 06-27-2010, 01:03 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I don't want to go to bed until I know for sure...

I don't want to go to bed until I know for sure that I'm not going to vomit anymore. BUT NOT EVEN I CAN SEE THE FUTURE
Forum: Literature 06-26-2010, 01:41 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 2,141
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Here are some of my feelings on playwriting. ...

Here are some of my feelings on playwriting. Ignore at your peril.

-Don't ignore the physicality of your characters or your scenes. I know this seems basic, and I come off as a condescending...
Forum: Fashion 06-25-2010, 12:39 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 1,663
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You can't wear a brown belt with black shoes. Or...

You can't wear a brown belt with black shoes. Or vice versa.
Forum: General 06-24-2010, 01:06 PM
Replies: 102
Views: 4,500
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"Gothic.net" is a work of long-form experimental...

"Gothic.net" is a work of long-form experimental fiction by author Stephanie Meyer, written on commission from multinational conglomerate 'blueblood'. The piece depicts an internet forum from which a...
Forum: General 06-23-2010, 09:59 AM
Replies: 51
Views: 2,378
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Oh, so it's like Clerics in D&D-- except, instead...

Oh, so it's like Clerics in D&D-- except, instead of make-believe, it's a delusion. Do you already have a group or can I play?
Forum: General 06-23-2010, 09:52 AM
Replies: 51
Views: 2,378
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Pretending to have magical powers > actually...

Pretending to have magical powers > actually believing yourself to have magical powers.
Forum: General 06-22-2010, 10:07 PM
Replies: 51
Views: 2,378
Posted By gothicusmaximus
1. For every human being on Earth to have the...

1. For every human being on Earth to have the power to fly at a speed facilitating rapid travel to other planets, even galaxies.

2. For the body of every human being on Earth to become a...
Forum: Spooky News 06-22-2010, 04:17 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 1,512
Posted By gothicusmaximus
No joke, this was Glenn Beck's big story a few...

No joke, this was Glenn Beck's big story a few days ago.
Forum: Literature 06-22-2010, 12:41 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,231
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That post was for the other asshole. We seem to...

That post was for the other asshole. We seem to have posted at around the same time, so I missed your post last night.



TheFeatheredAethling can't tell rhyming from punning
and yet somehow I...
Forum: Literature 06-22-2010, 12:54 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,231
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Indeed I did. I probably should have made a...

Indeed I did. I probably should have made a separate thread for it-- then you could **sigh**.
Forum: Literature 06-21-2010, 01:46 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,231
Posted By gothicusmaximus
four little idiots postin' in a row I'm pretty...

four little idiots postin' in a row
I'm pretty sure they've never read an actual poe... m.
Forum: General 06-20-2010, 01:48 PM
Replies: 28
Views: 2,825
Posted By gothicusmaximus
So you can wear whatever you clothes you want, as...

So you can wear whatever you clothes you want, as long they're either white, gold, red, or some combination thereof?
That's fucking bizarre. I've never heard of anything like that.
Forum: Literature 06-14-2010, 12:03 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,474
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You act like the desiccated corpse of Ramses II...

You act like the desiccated corpse of Ramses II has lurched out of its Sarcophagus to pick on you. I'm 21. I was your age when I joined this board, and never have I rendered an embarrassment that, in...
Forum: Whining 06-13-2010, 12:55 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 1,066
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Quit trolling, Mir.

Quit trolling, Mir.
Forum: Literature 06-13-2010, 12:18 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,474
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Is it just me or does the above post imply that...

Is it just me or does the above post imply that Angelic Dissonance actually does have herpes?
Anyway, no inflammation of the genital region could possibility induce in me so great a delirium that...
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 06-13-2010, 10:40 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 1,256
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You'd think this guy actually believes that what...

You'd think this guy actually believes that what he's come up with here is somehow less stupid and childish than Outworld and Earthrealm and whatnot.
Also, is that Seven of Nine?
Forum: Whining 06-12-2010, 07:33 AM
Replies: 750
Views: 60,130
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Just wanted to pop in and say how refreshing it...

Just wanted to pop in and say how refreshing it is to see that a true blue imbecile, gleefully dense but too soft-headed for trolling, is once again traipsing about gnet.
Forum: Literature 06-12-2010, 07:15 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,474
Posted By gothicusmaximus
What the fuck? You're like a girl with festering...

What the fuck? You're like a girl with festering oral herpes who calls me gay when I refuse a blowjob.
Forum: Literature 06-10-2010, 09:42 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,474
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I made you a Venn Diagram. ...

I made you a Venn Diagram.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v201/xplus/poemred.png
Forum: General 06-09-2010, 07:19 PM
Replies: 5,220
Views: 252,767
Posted By gothicusmaximus
one-year subscription please.

one-year subscription please.
Forum: Spooky News 06-09-2010, 02:35 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 1,814
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I sensed in your and Despanan's posts the...

I sensed in your and Despanan's posts the suggestion of a distinction between reproachable negligence and active malice. I think these excessive proscriptions are probably due more to the former than...
Forum: Spooky News 06-09-2010, 02:13 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 1,814
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I don't think malice is the motive here. If...

I don't think malice is the motive here. If you've already committed yourself to maintaining a nebulously legal blockade, to err on the side of attrition is simply less of a hassle, especially...
Forum: Whining 06-07-2010, 11:23 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 1,066
Posted By gothicusmaximus
A Trial by our Peers PART 3: The Final Chapter

The choice is yours, and yours alone.
Forum: General 06-05-2010, 08:16 PM
Replies: 3,238
Views: 210,544
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Drinkan Drinkan beer

Drinkan

Drinkan beer
Forum: General 06-04-2010, 05:13 PM
Replies: 42
Views: 5,314
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"In 1799 Napoleon wrote to Marmount about the...

"In 1799 Napoleon wrote to Marmount about the dogs so common in Egypt, advising him to make use of them. 'Tie some of those dogs up near the walls.'. The inference was that they would bark when any...
Forum: General 06-04-2010, 03:08 PM
Replies: 42
Views: 5,314
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Poodle: dog of the year, all years. ...

Poodle: dog of the year, all years.

http://www.interestment.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/lampard-poodle.jpg
Forum: Politics 06-04-2010, 02:54 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 2,153
Posted By gothicusmaximus
just go to MSNBC and offer to make negative...

just go to MSNBC and offer to make negative comments about Fox.
Forum: General 06-01-2010, 01:49 PM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
My play's in NY fringe this summer.

My play's in NY fringe this summer.
Forum: Whining 05-30-2010, 02:50 PM
Replies: 67
Views: 2,876
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Wait a minute, are you telling me you're some...

Wait a minute, are you telling me you're some kind of... ATHEIST? Why the hell are we wasting our time picking on a guy who believes that environmentalism and socialized healthcare are deceptions...
Forum: Whining 05-29-2010, 11:46 PM
Replies: 67
Views: 2,876
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Okay, guys, I know this can be easily forgotten,...

Okay, guys, I know this can be easily forgotten, but xjin is in fact sentient. Your pet Collie did not just rear up on its hind legs, smash its paws on your keyboard, and miraculously produce an...
Forum: General 05-29-2010, 11:26 PM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Fucking switch to water already. EDIT: Or...

Fucking switch to water already.

EDIT: Or coke (the drug)
Forum: Politics 05-29-2010, 05:50 PM
Replies: 53
Views: 5,380
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I like the rest of your post fine, but you've...

I like the rest of your post fine, but you've obviously never owned a Rolex.
Forum: Whining 05-26-2010, 09:31 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 1,417
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Quantify what a loathsome shit you are in...

Quantify what a loathsome shit you are in reality, and raise your shittiness to the fifth power. That's how loathsome of a shit you seem to everyone on gothic.net.
By syllogism, I really am one of...
Forum: General 05-26-2010, 12:14 PM
Replies: 44
Views: 5,968
Posted By gothicusmaximus
oh man, Jillian was funny in 2006.

oh man, Jillian was funny in 2006.
Forum: Whining 05-25-2010, 09:38 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,544
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Like D0p3y said, just google it. If you want to...

Like D0p3y said, just google it. If you want to find articles with that exact phrasing, search "illegal immigration net positive" or something.
Forum: Whining 05-25-2010, 06:29 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 2,544
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Actually, as I understand it, the general...

Actually, as I understand it, the general consensus of economists is that illegal immigration isn't a drain on the US economy at all. In fact, it's a net positive, albeit a negligibly small one.
Forum: Whining 05-23-2010, 10:03 AM
Replies: 159
Views: 43,049
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Troll gnet once, shame on you. Troll gnet twice--...

Troll gnet once, shame on you. Troll gnet twice-- uh-- can't get trolled again.
Forum: Spooky News 05-22-2010, 05:33 PM
Replies: 22
Views: 1,442
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I think the apparent value of humanity depends on...

I think the apparent value of humanity depends on the breadth of one's lens. Personally, I'm inclined to do as you're doing and judge humanity on human terms, in which case our myriad failings are...
Forum: Whining 05-20-2010, 09:01 AM
Replies: 111
Views: 2,996
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Deadman, whether you deserve disability is...

Deadman, whether you deserve disability is irrelevant, although I've a feeling this accident was brought on, at least in part, by your own stupidity.
What's ironic is that you're screaming "GET OFF...
Forum: Whining 05-18-2010, 12:06 AM
Replies: 95
Views: 2,955
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Who could have anticipated that, of all the...

Who could have anticipated that, of all the people to post in this thread, the OP would emerge as the third most mature? Actually, hell, I could have, I've been on these boards for almost three years...
Forum: General 05-15-2010, 10:31 PM
Replies: 28
Views: 2,305
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I go to a densely populated area, extend my arm...

I go to a densely populated area, extend my arm in front of me, and spin around rapidly for five minutes before gradually slowing to halt.
Forum: Politics 05-15-2010, 12:13 AM
Replies: 29
Views: 2,585
Posted By gothicusmaximus
This thread is lolz.

This thread is lolz.
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 05-12-2010, 12:11 PM
Replies: 20
Views: 2,603
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Fuck you guys, MK vs. DC had the best 3D Mortal...

Fuck you guys, MK vs. DC had the best 3D Mortal Kombat fighting engine. The free-fall Kombat was awesome, and the rage bar forced you to integrate some measure of strategy. I concede that the...
Forum: Politics 05-12-2010, 12:34 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,680
Posted By gothicusmaximus
What the fuck? Do you mean the popular vote? The...

What the fuck? Do you mean the popular vote? The Tories won that, too.
The Lib-Dems do have far fewer seats per vote than the other two parties, though.
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 05-11-2010, 08:06 PM
Replies: 108
Views: 16,197
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Granted, I've probably seen fewer than a season's...

Granted, I've probably seen fewer than a season's worth of Supernatural episodes. Some friends of mine are fans, so sometime's they'll have popped in a netflix'd DVD when I roll by to shoot the shit....
Forum: Politics 05-07-2010, 12:16 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,680
Posted By gothicusmaximus
It's 3:12 AM. The bad news is that I have a huge...

It's 3:12 AM. The bad news is that I have a huge paper due on Monday, and I am sitting here refreshing the BBC vote count like some fucking self-destructively anglophilic goon. The good news is that...
Forum: General 05-06-2010, 09:15 PM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm studying in the library when gnawing hunger...

I'm studying in the library when gnawing hunger drives me downstairs to the exhortionist vending machines. To my surprise, some 'free food' event is just wrapping up, leaving behind an empty Dunkin...
Forum: Politics 05-06-2010, 11:38 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,680
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Faveat etonia!

]http://www.gothic.net/boards/attachment.php?attachmentid=45&d=1273170916
Choose wisely, limeys.
Forum: General 05-05-2010, 11:55 PM
Replies: 7,623
Sticky: Picture Post 2
Views: 523,065
Posted By gothicusmaximus
If someone put a gun to my head, showed me this...

If someone put a gun to my head, showed me this picture, and said "WHICH ONE HAS A VAGINA? GUESS NOW BITCH, AND YOU BETTER HOPE YOU GET IT RIGHT," I would definitely guess your boyfriend.
Forum: General 05-05-2010, 10:31 AM
Replies: 42
Views: 2,350
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You should take my word for it, because Fact...

You should take my word for it, because

Fact #5: For all his scintillating manhood, gothicusmaximus remains far closer to being a woman than vindicatedxjin.
Forum: Introductions 05-05-2010, 01:11 AM
Replies: 44
Eh
Views: 2,161
Posted By gothicusmaximus
MegearaErotica?

MegearaErotica?
Forum: General 05-04-2010, 11:55 PM
Replies: 42
Views: 2,350
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Fact #1b: seriously, all of them. Without...

Fact #1b: seriously, all of them. Without exception.
Forum: General 05-04-2010, 11:54 PM
Replies: 42
Views: 2,350
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Facts Game

this is a game where we list facts.

Fact #1: all girls like to get it in the face
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 05-03-2010, 05:49 PM
Replies: 108
Views: 16,197
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I just find it hackneyed, shallow, and seeped in...

I just find it hackneyed, shallow, and seeped in the CW's unique brand of network cheese. It's entertainment without real nuance, and thus rather dull in spite of its convoluted, increasingly silly...
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 05-02-2010, 04:46 PM
Replies: 108
Views: 16,197
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I hate this show and I get vaguely angry when you...

I hate this show and I get vaguely angry when you reference it.
Forum: Whining 05-02-2010, 02:54 PM
Replies: 750
Views: 60,130
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Fucking thank you. Now I can devote the few...

Fucking thank you. Now I can devote the few minutes I would have otherwise spent flipping a shit to studying for my exams.
Forum: Whining 05-02-2010, 10:32 AM
Replies: 53
Views: 3,143
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I think you're confusing evil and sadism with...

I think you're confusing evil and sadism with mental health, which are only related in that they're qualities you lack. Self-love is rewarded, not 'evil', and self-loathing, not 'kindness', is...
Forum: Whining 04-28-2010, 03:14 PM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Clear does not equate to dumbed-down. If you have...

Clear does not equate to dumbed-down. If you have trouble understanding what I say, you're too dense for me to bother with anyway.



No shitty argument is complete without a dictionary...
Forum: Whining 04-28-2010, 01:09 PM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Don't listen to ape_descendant. He is to me as...

Don't listen to ape_descendant. He is to me as xjin is to you. Read what I said about this.
Forum: Spooky News 04-28-2010, 11:53 AM
Replies: 49
Views: 3,233
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"Well ma'am, your unborn daughter has ten...

"Well ma'am, your unborn daughter has ten adorable little fingers, ten adorable little toes, and baby blue eyes full of wonder and promise. We were able to detect a heartbeat, some slight movement--...
Forum: Spooky News 04-28-2010, 11:44 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 1,235
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Sounds like he was... JUSTIFIED...

Sounds like he was... JUSTIFIED (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TWkCL3GwOA&feature=player_embedded#!)
Forum: Fashion 04-28-2010, 11:39 AM
Replies: 105
Views: 6,715
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Leave Korinna alone, Saya. She just wants to side...

Leave Korinna alone, Saya. She just wants to side with the smart people in internet fights while retaining a reason to drink mead under a tree on midsummer. Why you gotta be persecutin'? NEVER AGAIN...
Forum: Whining 04-27-2010, 05:02 PM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You're right that 'I am about to grow a flower...

You're right that 'I am about to grow a flower from the top of my head' is opposed by what we know of natural laws, but it contains an implicit idea that our knowledge is incomplete and some power...
Forum: Whining 04-27-2010, 04:12 PM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Even the most abstruse notion of a creator is...

Even the most abstruse notion of a creator is illogical in a way that atheism isn't, as the purest logic assumes nothing that isn't suggested by evidence.

Consider the thesis "I am about to grow...
Forum: Whining 04-27-2010, 12:53 PM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I didn't intend to say "So, gee, I don't get why...

I didn't intend to say "So, gee, I don't get why people are religious". I was refuting Saya's idea that atheism has nothing to do with logic.
I fully understand the impulse that moves people to...
Forum: Whining 04-26-2010, 11:35 PM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
To be an atheist for an illogical reason is...

To be an atheist for an illogical reason is possible. However, to be religious for a logical reason is impossible.
Forum: Whining 04-25-2010, 10:32 AM
Replies: 117
Views: 4,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm about as tall as you-- represent. It's pretty...

I'm about as tall as you-- represent. It's pretty much an uncorrectable physical deformity, especially when it comes to getting laid, but we have to rise above. Ironically.
Forum: Spooky News 04-25-2010, 09:57 AM
Replies: 22
Views: 2,258
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I think the censored episode actually presents a...

I think the censored episode actually presents a more offensive and potentially harmful conception of Muslims than the uncensored one. In the past, South Park has belligerently, heedlessly mocked...
Forum: Whining 04-23-2010, 08:43 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I would probably opt for "fucking tool" myself,...

I would probably opt for "fucking tool" myself, but gothster works.
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 04-23-2010, 08:51 AM
Replies: 24
Views: 3,323
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That's completely absurd and hasn't been even an...

That's completely absurd and hasn't been even an understandable misconception for about fifty years. I don't mean to sound like an asshole who condescends to people who don't spend their valuable...
Forum: Shill 04-21-2010, 10:22 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 1,894
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I will be there, but only so I can get wasted on...

I will be there, but only so I can get wasted on free outdoor gear.
Forum: Spooky News 04-19-2010, 09:21 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 1,560
Posted By gothicusmaximus
The European Union is Gothic.net

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/feb/26/nigel-farange-ukip-rampage-rudeness
Forum: Spooky News 04-19-2010, 12:24 PM
Replies: 106
Views: 5,568
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Someone didn't read the thread.

Someone didn't read the thread.
Forum: General 04-18-2010, 11:45 AM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I can always count on Mir to adore everything...

I can always count on Mir to adore everything that sucks, and resent everything that doesn't. Like a compass unerringly pointing true south, he still guides my course-- and that makes my day.
Forum: Whining 04-18-2010, 11:20 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
At any given moment, I have countless better...

At any given moment, I have countless better things to do. I just often don't do those things. I know you've not been a college student for quite a while, but this is our lifestyle.



My barbs...
Forum: Whining 04-18-2010, 10:14 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Maybe I should give you the benefit of the doubt...

Maybe I should give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that juxtaposing a profession of the depth, relevance, and intellect of your humor with the most artless, irrelevant, and desperate riposte...
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 12:24 PM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
The Polanski debate...

The Polanski debate (http://www.gothic.net/boards/showthread.php?t=16297) was the turning point. That thread is a microcosm of the trends that have brought gnet's political climate to its present...
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 09:41 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yuk, yuk, yuk. Fuck, you really shouldn't let...

Yuk, yuk, yuk. Fuck, you really shouldn't let your bottom-tier jokes fly so shortly after I treat the form to a string of my warrior-caste witticisms. The comparison does not flatter.
Although I...
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 12:52 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Felllow gnetters, do me a favor-- if I'm ever as...

Felllow gnetters, do me a favor-- if I'm ever as drunk as xjin is hoping I am right now, call the police.
In the meantime, Bingo Wings, dial it the fuck back.
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 12:27 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You know, this is a recurring motif in my life....

You know, this is a recurring motif in my life. Somehow 'go fuck yourself' seems to always end up turning into 'hold me and never let go' at some point after I say it and before the other person...
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 12:17 AM
Replies: 46
Views: 3,004
Posted By gothicusmaximus
If the question "Do I have the right to be mad...

If the question "Do I have the right to be mad that the woman with whom I understood myself to be in an exclusive relationship let some other asshole stick his penis in her?" is giving you trouble,...
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 12:06 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That would be telling, if you could comprehend...

That would be telling, if you could comprehend anything but Relient K lyrics and the camera function on your cell phone.
Forum: Whining 04-17-2010, 12:02 AM
Replies: 72
Views: 4,085
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I like how Doppleganger thinks that exposing...

I like how Doppleganger thinks that exposing Gothic.net's low tolerance for criticism and tendency to mete out bans with little justification is hard-hitting investigative journalism or something. ...
Forum: Whining 04-16-2010, 11:52 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That's absolutely how a countersuit works. In...

That's absolutely how a countersuit works. In fact, I said virtually nothing that isn't implicit in the very definition of 'countersuit'. I'm really curious to know what warped understanding of the...
Forum: Spooky News 04-15-2010, 07:32 PM
Replies: 60
Views: 9,280
Posted By gothicusmaximus
What bothers me is that this Dominic Deville guy,...

What bothers me is that this Dominic Deville guy, although he may not actually be an evil clown, is still clearly not the kind of person that a well-reasoned parent invites into his or her child's...
Forum: Whining 04-15-2010, 07:24 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
But because of her case is in fact extremely...

But because of her case is in fact extremely legit, it turns out all she's done is post the truth on the internet, so she'll end up winning both suits and walking away with enough money to move out...
Forum: Whining 04-15-2010, 07:13 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Gothic.net, why can't you be ill-tempered and...

Gothic.net, why can't you be ill-tempered and hair-trigger to my convenience for once? That is to say, just fucking ban Korinna.



The administration here is infamously to the right of the...
Forum: Whining 04-14-2010, 08:53 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I imagine she'll eventually stand in a courtroom...

I imagine she'll eventually stand in a courtroom and say "my former employers implied [a, b, and c] and it wasn't true". As I'm certain said former employers already know to which accusations she...
Forum: Spooky News 04-12-2010, 04:16 AM
Replies: 86
Views: 5,315
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Believe it or not, I actually don't like to...

Believe it or not, I actually don't like to derail discussions with tangential remarks, but I have to say-- god, this is dumb.
Forum: Music 04-11-2010, 10:38 AM
Replies: 110
Views: 8,232
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Female artists who address sex in their work...

Female artists who address sex in their work don't do so strictly to attract or titillate a male audience. While there's no denying that some women market themselves as sex objects, to claim 'mostly'...
Forum: Whining 04-10-2010, 11:30 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Not if her case is actually legit. What could she...

Not if her case is actually legit. What could she stand to lose?
Forum: Whining 04-10-2010, 09:56 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Hey, Korinna, what are you former employers...

Hey, Korinna, what are you former employers saying about you?
Forum: General 04-09-2010, 03:18 PM
Replies: 56
Views: 4,105
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Leave it to me to hit my quota for played-out...

Leave it to me to hit my quota for played-out quips just when '*facepalm*' emerges as the only practical retort.
Forum: General 04-08-2010, 04:49 PM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
This would really only work if your place of...

This would really only work if your place of employment hires fourth graders who don't yet type by muscle memory.



That will just create the appearance that you're retarded, and inspire kids to...
Forum: Whining 04-08-2010, 10:31 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'm interested to know what they're saying about...

I'm interested to know what they're saying about you, presumably at those heavily attended Target managers luncheons.
Forum: Whining 04-08-2010, 10:29 AM
Replies: 1
Views: 809
Posted By gothicusmaximus
It's not so bad. Plus, if you're really a bitch...

It's not so bad. Plus, if you're really a bitch about it, they'll give you a few days worth of Vicodin. Every cloud has a drug cache.
Forum: General 04-08-2010, 10:26 AM
Replies: 56
Views: 4,105
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I'll take the triteness bullet for the team and...

I'll take the triteness bullet for the team and be the one to say "marked improvement."
Forum: Politics 04-07-2010, 08:53 AM
Replies: 53
Views: 5,380
Posted By gothicusmaximus
In Soviet Russia, Q As you.

In Soviet Russia, Q As you.
Forum: General 04-07-2010, 08:44 AM
Replies: 7,623
Sticky: Picture Post 2
Views: 523,065
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I hate to say it, but that lip piercing has...

I hate to say it, but that lip piercing has delivered the coup de grace upon my once-proud boner for Xombie.
Unrelatedly, does anyone else think Meth looks a little like the T-1000?
Forum: Spooky News 04-05-2010, 09:44 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,725
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Why hasn't Propaganda Minister Gaga offered Alex...

Why hasn't Propaganda Minister Gaga offered Alex Jones 5 million dollars to shut up?
Forum: General 04-05-2010, 09:17 PM
Replies: 5,220
Views: 252,767
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Honeythorn, your huge, garish fish banner will...

Honeythorn, your huge, garish fish banner will definitely do nothing to sway anyone from treating their pets irresponsibly. It will serve only to agitate members of gothic.net. In fact, I'm...
Forum: Spooky News 04-04-2010, 03:45 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 2,733
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"That's what you get when you overwrite my Zelda...

"That's what you get when you overwrite my Zelda file!"



They probably don't really wonder why you're misanthropic so much as wish you would stop talking about it in a vain bid to gain their...
Forum: General 04-02-2010, 11:32 PM
Replies: 133
Views: 8,864
Posted By gothicusmaximus
This list.

This list.
Forum: Whining 04-01-2010, 10:41 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 1,145
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Good god. Leave your house.

Good god. Leave your house.
Forum: Whining 03-30-2010, 08:01 PM
Replies: 95
Views: 4,821
Posted By gothicusmaximus
The notion of a family in which Glenn Beck isn't...

The notion of a family in which Glenn Beck isn't the insane, retarded cousin is arrestingly horrifying.
Forum: Literature 03-27-2010, 02:37 PM
Replies: 64
Views: 8,946
Posted By gothicusmaximus
The Pumpkin Tide, by Richard Brautigan I saw...

The Pumpkin Tide, by Richard Brautigan

I saw thousands of pumpkins last night
come floating in on the tide,
bumping up against the rocks and
rolling up on the beaches;
it must be Halloween in...
Forum: Whining 03-21-2010, 03:48 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
False alarm.

False alarm.
Forum: Whining 03-21-2010, 12:45 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I can't get comfortable enough to fall asleep....

I can't get comfortable enough to fall asleep. The gushing wound where my penis used to be hurts.
Forum: Literature 03-21-2010, 12:30 AM
Replies: 60
Views: 5,949
Posted By gothicusmaximus
General wisdom dictates that to overdose on...

General wisdom dictates that to overdose on insipidity is impossible, but after reading this thread I'm already breathing really shallow, and I fear that one more goth subculture discussion might...
Forum: Whining 03-21-2010, 12:17 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
There is currently an attractive woman sleeping...

There is currently an attractive woman sleeping beside me. I haven't had sex with her. New low. Emasculated forever.
Forum: General 03-19-2010, 04:33 PM
Replies: 44
Views: 4,470
Posted By gothicusmaximus
JCC and I stick out on this board because,...

JCC and I stick out on this board because, apparently, we're two of the only members whose thoughts aren't constantly muddied by the actual murmuring of the devil.
Allow me to take this opportunity...
Forum: General 03-19-2010, 03:46 PM
Replies: 44
Views: 4,470
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I only got a 7. How the fuck does everyone score...

I only got a 7. How the fuck does everyone score so high?
More importantly, is 'incested' a word?
Forum: Whining 03-18-2010, 12:17 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
No penis. .

No penis.
.
Forum: Whining 03-09-2010, 10:18 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
My mother's MS mysteriously 'flares up' whenever...

My mother's MS mysteriously 'flares up' whenever I imply that I don't want to go to law school.
Forum: Spooky News 03-06-2010, 09:22 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 1,533
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Frequent gothic.net poster has small penis ...

Frequent gothic.net poster has small penis

FAST FACTS:

*Man with internet access and unhealthy BMI posts incessantly about his suspiciously powerful affection for firearms.
*Poster has never...
Forum: Whining 03-03-2010, 11:21 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 1,761
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You don't have a Bachelor's degree? I hope...

You don't have a Bachelor's degree?
I hope you're working on one, or at least intend to get one eventually. That's the new high school diploma-- without it, you can pretty much look forward to...
Forum: Whining 03-03-2010, 08:55 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 1,761
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Get a better job.

Get a better job.
Forum: General 02-28-2010, 09:53 PM
Replies: 55
Views: 4,921
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Dinosaur Comics can occasionally elicit a chuckle...

Dinosaur Comics can occasionally elicit a chuckle from me, but Axe Cop is the only webcomic I've ever found really hilarious.
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 02-27-2010, 12:10 PM
Replies: 0
Views: 1,063
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Open your eyes...

I see
(http://games.adultswim.com/robot-unicorn-attack-twitchy-online-game.html)your eyes are open.
Wear no disguise
for me.
Come into the open.

When it's cold
outside,
Am I here
in...
Forum: Spooky News 02-26-2010, 10:28 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 1,451
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Deadman, you never link to anything except...

Deadman, you never link to anything except fucking PrisonPlanet and Infowars. Don't dare pretend that the first thing you do each time the sun rises on a new day in your sordid, lonely life, after...
Forum: Literature 02-22-2010, 04:16 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 2,295
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I take less joy in this than I ordinarily would,...

I take less joy in this than I ordinarily would, Alan, but I have to translate. I'm sorry. It's too hilarious.

On The Barricades

This is the place of our “defeat” (I believe défaite usually...
Forum: Introductions 02-22-2010, 03:42 PM
Replies: 28
Views: 3,310
Posted By gothicusmaximus
YeAh, ROCK ON \m/!!1 100s of millinz of $ in...

YeAh, ROCK ON \m/!!1 100s of millinz of $ in revenue! Commershuls on SPIKETV! Posters in teh SUBWayzzz.. UNDAGROUND BITCH! FuCk ThA MaInStReEM. BOYZ RULE, GIRLZ DROOL.
Forum: Literature 02-22-2010, 03:21 PM
Replies: 19
Views: 2,488
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Nothing Ophelia has said is even one...

Nothing Ophelia has said is even one quintillionth as offensive to Amunet as this 'poem' is to the institution of literature and to intelligent people worldwide. If Ophelia infiltrated my apartment...
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 02:04 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That's cool, just keep saying 'fail' until you...

That's cool, just keep saying 'fail' until you feel better. At least then people might judge you to be a mentally sound, if incompetent, internet troll, rather than the babbling loon that you...
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 01:24 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 3,229
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Take amphs.

Take amphs.
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 12:35 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I actually starting typing a post about how my...

I actually starting typing a post about how my 'somehow' implied difficulty where you said easily, but then my jaw slackened and I just stared at that post in all it's awesomely dense, oblivious...
Forum: Spooky News 02-21-2010, 12:15 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 1,577
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Practicality from a strategic standpoint isn't...

Practicality from a strategic standpoint isn't really the problem with that suggestion, POS.
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 12:03 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Yeah, your weight has nothing to do with your...

Yeah, your weight has nothing to do with your capacity for reason, but your fucking Brobdingnagian self-image issues do. I mean, look at you-- I make an obviously hyperbolic joke about the heft of...
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 11:40 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
You mean, like, when I said US 12 was a plus...

You mean, like, when I said US 12 was a plus size, and you proceeded to accuse me of harboring a depraved sexual fetish for skeletal anorexics? I remember that. Subsequently, I suggested that...
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 11:29 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Oh, right. I forgot that whenever someone dares...

Oh, right. I forgot that whenever someone dares to confront you with the fact that you're an imbecilic shit-stain, you launch into the message board equivalent of ensconcing yourself in a corner,...
Forum: Whining 02-21-2010, 11:19 AM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
And just as you're entitled to an opinion, JCC is...

And just as you're entitled to an opinion, JCC is entitled to advise that you shove it up your cobwebbed vagina.
Really, did you think you had brought the entire vegan movement crashing down...
Forum: Literature 02-19-2010, 10:52 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 1,487
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I think the first stanza is boring and, in fact,...

I think the first stanza is boring and, in fact, totally unnecessary. The rest is aight, with the possible exception of 'set together without adhesives or joints', as set together is just redundant...
Forum: Fashion 02-19-2010, 09:40 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 4,734
Posted By gothicusmaximus
In order to render this counsel, I must first...

In order to render this counsel, I must first confess that my initial appraisal of this outfit was shamefully cursory. Of course, I usually drop everything that I might consider any new chapter in...
Forum: Spooky News 02-19-2010, 10:14 AM
Replies: 11
Views: 1,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Clearly, the guy was a maniac, but in some...

Clearly, the guy was a maniac, but in some respects I empathize with him. His insanity is in his actions, not in his anger.
He definitely threw the media a curve ball with that suicide note. On one...
Forum: Spooky News 02-19-2010, 09:34 AM
Replies: 11
Views: 1,286
Posted By gothicusmaximus
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/02/18/joe-stack...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/02/18/joe-stack-statement-alleg_n_467539.html?page=2
Forum: Introductions 02-19-2010, 09:11 AM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,279
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Luminous literary analysis. Actually,...

Luminous literary analysis.



Actually, only the germ of what eventually became Frankenstein was written under the influence of opium. Not to imply that whether an author makes use of...
Forum: Whining 02-18-2010, 09:48 AM
Replies: 32
Views: 2,879
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Anarasha, this is a girl on the edge. If you keep...

Anarasha, this is a girl on the edge. If you keep trying to feed her such brazen lies, she'll never trust anyone again.
Forum: General 02-17-2010, 11:36 AM
Replies: 34
Views: 3,787
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Happy Birthday, JCC. xxxxx.

Today, my second favorite thing to which I refer by the initials JCC turns 16 years old. This occasion isn't as significant as I initially thought, given that the uncompromising dictates of the...
Forum: General 02-16-2010, 09:26 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 3,289
Posted By gothicusmaximus
If a ghost went down on you,...

If a ghost went down on you, (http://i.imagehost.org/0949/temp.jpg) would it be considered awesome?
Forum: Whining 02-15-2010, 12:49 PM
Replies: 32
Views: 2,995
Posted By gothicusmaximus
See, xjin doesn't hate black people. Just black...

See, xjin doesn't hate black people. Just black behavior.
Forum: General 02-14-2010, 03:46 PM
Replies: 4,246
Views: 204,376
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Invented by the Nazis!

Invented by the Nazis!
Forum: Spooky News 02-14-2010, 10:38 AM
Replies: 88
Views: 5,193
Posted By gothicusmaximus
If I had to pick one thread to embody the...

If I had to pick one thread to embody the quintessence of gothic.net, this one would be it.
A news story about a bunch of slaughtered kids provokes piteous quibbling over street cred, a good page...
Forum: Whining 02-13-2010, 06:30 PM
Replies: 32
Views: 2,617
Posted By gothicusmaximus
41 graytext

41
graytext
Forum: Fashion 02-10-2010, 07:07 AM
Replies: 116
Views: 9,922
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I assume people who wear bullet belts to be...

I assume people who wear bullet belts to be slovenly ignoramuses, and I think that's okay. After all, when I see a Triscut, do I not assume that it will be delicious? My experience with people who...
Forum: Shill 02-09-2010, 12:58 PM
Replies: 23
Views: 3,367
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Digging it, Desp. Thanks a lot. One small qualm:...

Digging it, Desp. Thanks a lot. One small qualm: you accidentally credited Michael Donaldson (Renfield) as Harker-- that's Eric Williams.
Another smaller qualm: you spelled my name wrong. It's...
Forum: General 02-06-2010, 02:32 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 1,918
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Hilarious, cheers. You're 'Deathrocker', I...

Hilarious, cheers. You're 'Deathrocker', I presume?
Forum: Whining 02-05-2010, 05:22 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Tam, I think you need to get an aburption.

Tam, I think you need to get an aburption.
Forum: Whining 02-05-2010, 12:02 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"Waaaait a minute, I know you. Didn't your last...

"Waaaait a minute, I know you. Didn't your last boyfriend paint the wall with his mom?"
Forum: General 02-05-2010, 07:31 AM
Replies: 104
Views: 7,733
Posted By gothicusmaximus
That is pretty fucking demented and immoral, but...

That is pretty fucking demented and immoral, but on the bright side, I'd reckon you'd have a high chance for survival. Compassion for other human beings is the biggest obstacle to one's perseverance...
Forum: Literature 02-05-2010, 04:37 AM
Replies: 20
Views: 2,494
Posted By gothicusmaximus
"Hah! What, you guys thought I was trying to...

"Hah! What, you guys thought I was trying to write a good poem or something? Psh, uh, NO! Haha! I just wanted to waste your time! If I were TRYING, you would have loved it."
Forum: Whining 02-05-2010, 04:32 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 3,159
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Holy shit guys. Did you see this? It seems...

Holy shit guys. Did you see this? It seems like... like Crying Crimson Tears is some kind of... BISEXUAL or something!
Forum: Shill 02-03-2010, 09:41 AM
Replies: 20
Views: 2,880
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I am advertising my show, in the forum set aside...

I am advertising my show, in the forum set aside for advertising.

As for the recording, I'll talk with my peeps about it.
Forum: Shill 02-03-2010, 06:40 AM
Replies: 20
Views: 2,880
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Bumping for opening weekend. I've been watching...

Bumping for opening weekend. I've been watching some full dress rehearsals, and I have to say, my own genius fucking staggers me sometimes.
Forum: General 02-03-2010, 06:19 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,524
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Are you coming to New York? You should do my...

Are you coming to New York? You should do my hair. I'll give you 6 dollars.
Forum: General 02-03-2010, 03:45 AM
Replies: 104
Views: 7,733
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Everyone take a moment to appreciate that, in...

Everyone take a moment to appreciate that, in their desperately insecure attempts to except themselves from my obviously figurative characterization of people with Zombie plans, neither Angelic...
Forum: General 02-02-2010, 07:38 PM
Replies: 104
Views: 7,733
Posted By gothicusmaximus
No one with a 'zombie Plan' would actually...

No one with a 'zombie Plan' would actually survive a zombie invasion. In order to survive a zombie invasion, one must be an athletic badass who owns a gun and who is able to assemble a posse of...
Forum: Whining 02-02-2010, 10:16 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 760
Posted By gothicusmaximus
A screwdriver? What?

A screwdriver? What?
Forum: TV, Movies, & Games 01-31-2010, 04:13 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 1,633
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Holy shit, I hate Werewolves on Wheels. EDIT: I...

Holy shit, I hate Werewolves on Wheels.
EDIT: I looked at the website and I've actually seen all of these movies. I hate myself too.
Forum: General 01-31-2010, 04:12 PM
Replies: 7,623
Sticky: Picture Post 2
Views: 523,065
Posted By gothicusmaximus
Anarasha and Korinna totally work as a couple. ...

Anarasha and Korinna totally work as a couple.
I officially ship Korinnarasha.
Forum: Whining 01-30-2010, 12:29 PM
Replies: 8,281
Views: 390,047
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I woke up two hours ago. Already, my roommate and...

I woke up two hours ago. Already, my roommate and I are having a grueling fight about the Illiad. He thinks Achilles is in love with Briseis, and that his refusal to fight is motivated by fear of...
Forum: Spooky News 01-28-2010, 07:42 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 1,553
Posted By gothicusmaximus
I seem to recall him saying, on multiple...

I seem to recall him saying, on multiple occasions, that he continued to write for his own pleasure, and even that he'd completed a novel. NEW BOOK, SCORE!
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