Well, haven't you heard it's all the media's fault, and people should stop listening to all that gossip.
And people wonder why I quit the church. Well, actually, I quit because they kicked me out of being an altar boy, but this crap (that's been happening for decades) along with the church's long history of doing horrible things just confirmed my decision was the right one.
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Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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