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FistsofFury · 02-15-2012, 08:18 PM

[The Secret Side PART 3]

Reg grimaced at the cover of some Punisher issue; bored with the naked aggression, trench coats and guns. Why couldn’t the Punisher be depicted napping peacefully for once? What about a cover with Frank Castle feeding a litter of kittens?

“Do you read Young Liars anymore?” They slowly strode the aisle not looking at each other only staring at the nerd fodder. At the counter 25 feet away a customer was arguing about how he should get more money for his action figure because it was in mint condition. His voice had a stereotypically nasal quality to it.

“No I stopped after it got too crazy. Then broke down a couple months later and got the last few issues. I liked how it was a one shot deal.” Reg frowned as he answered. “I can dig people losing their memory and having fake memories instead. I can deal with secret alien invasions. I can’t deal with someone having their head chopped off and showing up next issue as if nothing happened. And with no explanation either?! What the fuck. I can’t support that.”

They continued talking about comic books and briefly about video games as they strode the earth toned carpet of the comic book store. From floor to ceiling there was geeky shit everywhere. Action figures older than half the customers were still sealed in their packages. They were displayed out of reach but then again so was most of the stuff in the store because there was simply too much of it. You don’t care about this part of the story.

(((((((((
::5:46 PM::
Reg held the door open for Paul and as they both stepped out of the dim, fragrant nerd stronghold and back into the cloudy grey skies of their particular urban autumn. The Midwestern sky was still grey and self-depreciating. The door creaked and clanged shut as Reginald the younger fumbled in his pocket for his Malboros.

“I can’t believe I used to smoke Camels.” Reg said with his eyes turned toward the concrete.

“I can’t believe you haven’t quit smoking yet. Can I get one of those from you??” Reg wordlessly handed him a cigarette and passed the lighter after lighting his own.

“Paul take a walk with me. Just around the block. It’s the fee I charge for bumming death sticks.”

“Corellian death sticks? What you got some??” They both snickered at the Star Wars reference. Fucking nerds. Paul noticed that the clouds had gotten thicker and darker in the few hours since he had really looked last.

“Let’s put our stuff in the car first.” Reg said, as if something tragic was likely to happen to new comic books during the brief stroll. If you asked him he’d say it was just because he didn’t want to carry them. Paul thought about Lucy as the car door shut. Her saw her annoyed expression in his mind for a brief flash and wondered what she was doing at that exact moment. He scolded himself internally and instead thought about the nicotine in his brain. They began walking down the sidewalk puffing on hell fume.

“I would like to quit eventually. I can feel the damage this stuff is doing already. But hey…that’s what they all say.” Reg muttered as he took a short drag and exhaled it immediately. In someone’s house near them a toddler was crying with a real enthusiasm.

Paul got to the point, inspired by the neatly mowed lawns surrounding him.

“1 in 4 smokers get some kind of smoking related illness! Odds are you’ll die of something else before the cigarettes catch up to you. Eitherway you’re going to die anyway.”

Paul took a long drag from his free cigarette and held the smoke in his mouth for a few seconds. Then he let it roll around in the long tunnel in his chest. He could certainly feel a weight sliding off of his body. Maybe just his head.

“Stop it. Just because we’re going to die anyway doesn’t mean its a good idea to gallop toward the grave. I used to think like you about this when I was stupid-”

“Most of us gallop in some kinda way. The best part of life is risking it!” Paul flicked ash on the concrete and smiled smug and crooked.

“The ‘me’ now has his priorities straight more often than not. But not always lucifer knows.” Reginald thought it was clever to replace ‘God’ with some form of ‘the adversary’ when he said those meaningless phrases, those conversation toppings that needlessly involved the infinite father. He thought of it as his way of keeping a low profile. Reginald has been an atheist for years. He pussies out and turns agnostic when things are going miraculously well.

Both of them were talking too loudly; a female senior citizen shuffling toward her mailbox glared at them from across the street. She had her mind on the property values.

“We’ve got a lot of life left Reg. You and I. Who knows what wonders we shall behold!” Paul smiled as he took a short drag and held in the smoke.

“You’re assuming a lot. Who knows what regrets we’ll accumulate as the years pile up. Who knows how many fun get togethers we’ll miss because we’ll be at work.” Reg grumbled as he exhaled through his nose. A fat man getting his mail waved to them as Paul and Reg walked. They waved back because Paul and Reg are nice too.

“I miss knowing for sure that someone I cared about cared about me.” Paul stated with an uncommon gravity. This seemed jarring to Reginald because he blinked in confusion one instant, then sighed the next.

“You never know for sure idiot. We can’t crawl into each other’s heads yet. I miss Ashley.” Reg let his finished cigarette slip off of his fingers and didn’t look to see where it fell. Paul noticed that his chocolate friend suddenly looked sad. Reginald looked sad because this Ashley was one of the good ones that he had dragged into his hell.

“Ashley? Hrm….the girl from the Upper Peninsula?!?” Paul made sure to toss his cigarette butt into the street and he tried not to have such a mocking tone of voice. He was just surprised at the mention of something so long ago.

“Yes. Ashley Chromsage from Calumet, Michigan. The one I must apologize to. Keep referring to her in that tone and I’ll kick your ass up and down the front of this elementary school.” The smile Reg had on returned as Paul laughed. Genuine laughter.

“Lucy’s a good girl.” Paul stated it like he had accomplished something. As the two rounded a corner they realized they were on their way back to their cars.

“I’ll be the judge of that, your perception’s fucked up. Are you sure the whore isn’t just toying with you?”

“Speak of her like that again and I’ll waterboard you on your birthday.” Paul had a stern face but he wasn’t serious and his friend knew it.

“My birthday is in March you’ll forget by then.”

“Keep fucking around like this Reg. You’ll end up with a heart of stone.” Paul was looking over Reg’s head to the kid on a bike across the street.

“Don’t worry comrade. I have a heart of ice, not of stone. It melts occasionally but it always re-freezes. Wanna know why?” The kid on the bike was talking to himself, immersed in his imagination as his metallic rocket exploring the rings of Saturn. Paul and Reg felt more than a little bit of jealously simultaneously but neither mentioned it to the other.

“I wanna know why you called me comrade.” Said Paul but Reg ignored him.

“Because it is so cold in the D.”

“Shut up Reginald.”

Reg was always so late with certain things. After all that internet video had been out for over a year. Both of them knew the walk was over when they re-approached the comic shop parking lot. They watched a female exit the shop; what a rare sight! After the metal clang of the door Reg broke the brief silence.

“You don?t understand. She was there with me when I really needed someone. She kept my soul fed when I was hanging on by a thread. Hey that rhymes.” All the color had evaporated from Reginald’s voice and he was left with a low deadpan as he watched Paul get into his car.

“Do you think she still thinks about you?” Paul asked trying not to sound condescending. Reginald would have ignored it anyway.

“I don’t know. Probably not. I’ve been looking for her…I never changed my cell phone number just so maybe one day she’d call…and she hasn’t called. She never had a cell phone and I never knew her address in the U. P. I saw it once on a package. You don’t know how I’ve kicked myself for not writing it down…but whatever.” Reg seemed to get farther away by the second as he stared into grey skies with a face of stone.

“You don’t know how much I’ve…..she probably thought I was a lying asshole. I was messing with her when I hadn’t completely ended things with my girlfriend at the time. I was just a fool. I want to find her so I can see how real it was. I want her to see how much I’ve changed! Above all that horseshit I just want to say sorry! I have to apologize to her. I should hire a private investigator….” Reg was adrift at this point and it made Paul feel uncomfortable.

“Hey man….I’ve gotta go.” Paul knew he sounded phony as he started his car. He didn’t know how to deal with the awkward pity he had for his friend. Reg snapped to the present and turned his eyes back toward Paul through the driver’s side window. The electricity behind his eyes had returned.

“Have a good day!” He shouted with a faked zest. Paul reversed out of his space and turned back to look. Reg was still standing there. He weakly waved goodbye as Paul drove away leaving Reginald to sail the dark ocean of regret; where the grey skies and black water went on forevermore. At least it felt like forever.

(((((((((

::8:50 PM::
Paul stared at the computer screen, his eyes scanning the virtual pages of text he had written years earlier. His face was blank in concentration as he reached to his left to turn off the shuffling music player.

02-15-2012, 08:18 PM	#8
FistsofFury Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: Detroit, Michigan USA Posts: 102	[The Secret Side PART 3] Reg grimaced at the cover of some Punisher issue; bored with the naked aggression, trench coats and guns. Why couldn’t the Punisher be depicted napping peacefully for once? What about a cover with Frank Castle feeding a litter of kittens? “Do you read Young Liars anymore?” They slowly strode the aisle not looking at each other only staring at the nerd fodder. At the counter 25 feet away a customer was arguing about how he should get more money for his action figure because it was in mint condition. His voice had a stereotypically nasal quality to it. “No I stopped after it got too crazy. Then broke down a couple months later and got the last few issues. I liked how it was a one shot deal.” Reg frowned as he answered. “I can dig people losing their memory and having fake memories instead. I can deal with secret alien invasions. I can’t deal with someone having their head chopped off and showing up next issue as if nothing happened. And with no explanation either?! What the fuck. I can’t support that.” They continued talking about comic books and briefly about video games as they strode the earth toned carpet of the comic book store. From floor to ceiling there was geeky shit everywhere. Action figures older than half the customers were still sealed in their packages. They were displayed out of reach but then again so was most of the stuff in the store because there was simply too much of it. You don’t care about this part of the story. ((((((((( ::5:46 PM:: Reg held the door open for Paul and as they both stepped out of the dim, fragrant nerd stronghold and back into the cloudy grey skies of their particular urban autumn. The Midwestern sky was still grey and self-depreciating. The door creaked and clanged shut as Reginald the younger fumbled in his pocket for his Malboros. “I can’t believe I used to smoke Camels.” Reg said with his eyes turned toward the concrete. “I can’t believe you haven’t quit smoking yet. Can I get one of those from you??” Reg wordlessly handed him a cigarette and passed the lighter after lighting his own. “Paul take a walk with me. Just around the block. It’s the fee I charge for bumming death sticks.” “Corellian death sticks? What you got some??” They both snickered at the Star Wars reference. Fucking nerds. Paul noticed that the clouds had gotten thicker and darker in the few hours since he had really looked last. “Let’s put our stuff in the car first.” Reg said, as if something tragic was likely to happen to new comic books during the brief stroll. If you asked him he’d say it was just because he didn’t want to carry them. Paul thought about Lucy as the car door shut. Her saw her annoyed expression in his mind for a brief flash and wondered what she was doing at that exact moment. He scolded himself internally and instead thought about the nicotine in his brain. They began walking down the sidewalk puffing on hell fume. “I would like to quit eventually. I can feel the damage this stuff is doing already. But hey…that’s what they all say.” Reg muttered as he took a short drag and exhaled it immediately. In someone’s house near them a toddler was crying with a real enthusiasm. Paul got to the point, inspired by the neatly mowed lawns surrounding him. “1 in 4 smokers get some kind of smoking related illness! Odds are you’ll die of something else before the cigarettes catch up to you. Eitherway you’re going to die anyway.” Paul took a long drag from his free cigarette and held the smoke in his mouth for a few seconds. Then he let it roll around in the long tunnel in his chest. He could certainly feel a weight sliding off of his body. Maybe just his head. “Stop it. Just because we’re going to die anyway doesn’t mean its a good idea to gallop toward the grave. I used to think like you about this when I was stupid-” “Most of us gallop in some kinda way. The best part of life is risking it!” Paul flicked ash on the concrete and smiled smug and crooked. “The ‘me’ now has his priorities straight more often than not. But not always lucifer knows.” Reginald thought it was clever to replace ‘God’ with some form of ‘the adversary’ when he said those meaningless phrases, those conversation toppings that needlessly involved the infinite father. He thought of it as his way of keeping a low profile. Reginald has been an atheist for years. He pussies out and turns agnostic when things are going miraculously well. Both of them were talking too loudly; a female senior citizen shuffling toward her mailbox glared at them from across the street. She had her mind on the property values. “We’ve got a lot of life left Reg. You and I. Who knows what wonders we shall behold!” Paul smiled as he took a short drag and held in the smoke. “You’re assuming a lot. Who knows what regrets we’ll accumulate as the years pile up. Who knows how many fun get togethers we’ll miss because we’ll be at work.” Reg grumbled as he exhaled through his nose. A fat man getting his mail waved to them as Paul and Reg walked. They waved back because Paul and Reg are nice too. “I miss knowing for sure that someone I cared about cared about me.” Paul stated with an uncommon gravity. This seemed jarring to Reginald because he blinked in confusion one instant, then sighed the next. “You never know for sure idiot. We can’t crawl into each other’s heads yet. I miss Ashley.” Reg let his finished cigarette slip off of his fingers and didn’t look to see where it fell. Paul noticed that his chocolate friend suddenly looked sad. Reginald looked sad because this Ashley was one of the good ones that he had dragged into his hell. “Ashley? Hrm….the girl from the Upper Peninsula?!?” Paul made sure to toss his cigarette butt into the street and he tried not to have such a mocking tone of voice. He was just surprised at the mention of something so long ago. “Yes. Ashley Chromsage from Calumet, Michigan. The one I must apologize to. Keep referring to her in that tone and I’ll kick your ass up and down the front of this elementary school.” The smile Reg had on returned as Paul laughed. Genuine laughter. “Lucy’s a good girl.” Paul stated it like he had accomplished something. As the two rounded a corner they realized they were on their way back to their cars. “I’ll be the judge of that, your perception’s fucked up. Are you sure the whore isn’t just toying with you?” “Speak of her like that again and I’ll waterboard you on your birthday.” Paul had a stern face but he wasn’t serious and his friend knew it. “My birthday is in March you’ll forget by then.” “Keep fucking around like this Reg. You’ll end up with a heart of stone.” Paul was looking over Reg’s head to the kid on a bike across the street. “Don’t worry comrade. I have a heart of ice, not of stone. It melts occasionally but it always re-freezes. Wanna know why?” The kid on the bike was talking to himself, immersed in his imagination as his metallic rocket exploring the rings of Saturn. Paul and Reg felt more than a little bit of jealously simultaneously but neither mentioned it to the other. “I wanna know why you called me comrade.” Said Paul but Reg ignored him. “Because it is so cold in the D.” “Shut up Reginald.” Reg was always so late with certain things. After all that internet video had been out for over a year. Both of them knew the walk was over when they re-approached the comic shop parking lot. They watched a female exit the shop; what a rare sight! After the metal clang of the door Reg broke the brief silence. “You don?t understand. She was there with me when I really needed someone. She kept my soul fed when I was hanging on by a thread. Hey that rhymes.” All the color had evaporated from Reginald’s voice and he was left with a low deadpan as he watched Paul get into his car. “Do you think she still thinks about you?” Paul asked trying not to sound condescending. Reginald would have ignored it anyway. “I don’t know. Probably not. I’ve been looking for her…I never changed my cell phone number just so maybe one day she’d call…and she hasn’t called. She never had a cell phone and I never knew her address in the U. P. I saw it once on a package. You don’t know how I’ve kicked myself for not writing it down…but whatever.” Reg seemed to get farther away by the second as he stared into grey skies with a face of stone. “You don’t know how much I’ve…..she probably thought I was a lying asshole. I was messing with her when I hadn’t completely ended things with my girlfriend at the time. I was just a fool. I want to find her so I can see how real it was. I want her to see how much I’ve changed! Above all that horseshit I just want to say sorry! I have to apologize to her. I should hire a private investigator….” Reg was adrift at this point and it made Paul feel uncomfortable. “Hey man….I’ve gotta go.” Paul knew he sounded phony as he started his car. He didn’t know how to deal with the awkward pity he had for his friend. Reg snapped to the present and turned his eyes back toward Paul through the driver’s side window. The electricity behind his eyes had returned. “Have a good day!” He shouted with a faked zest. Paul reversed out of his space and turned back to look. Reg was still standing there. He weakly waved goodbye as Paul drove away leaving Reginald to sail the dark ocean of regret; where the grey skies and black water went on forevermore. At least it felt like forever. ((((((((( ::8:50 PM:: Paul stared at the computer screen, his eyes scanning the virtual pages of text he had written years earlier. His face was blank in concentration as he reached to his left to turn off the shuffling music player.