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Originally Posted by Languor
The ratio of people telling women to be girly versus the people telling women they don't have to be weighs heavily on the former.
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Yes but both are highly problematic because they are telling someone what to be and not allowing them to be themself.
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Originally Posted by Languor
What I'm saying here is that "fighting to be feminine" because feminists won't let you be is diverting attention from issues like dismantling the patriarchy.
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I think you're kind of missing the point. It isn't about fighting against other feminists in order to be girly, it is just about being girly while fighting the patriarchy.
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Originally Posted by Languor
Who the fuck told you to change or leave?
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To date I have left three different feminist groups because they took issue with my style of dress and have had multiple conflicts with individuals. I have been screamed at for being a "shame to the movement" and told that I don't understand their struggle because the patriarchy loves women like me (whatever the hell that even means). Obviously not all feminists think that it is wrong for a woman to embrace her feminine side but sadly quite a few do and they tend to be quite vocal about it.
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Originally Posted by Languor
I didn't say her perspective isn't important because it's different than mine. Really? That's what came across? I'm not writing off this group's idea at all, I wouldn't waste time criticising it if it was complete bullshit.
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Everything you said came off as dismissing the blog for not being progressive or productive. That may not have been your intention but that is certainly how it read to me.
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Originally Posted by Languor
I think you're trying to paint me as some ogre who doesn't want people to express themselves and that makes me frown
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Why would I do something like that? Don't get me wrong it's a refreshing change from people thinking I'm too nice but it was not my intention. I was simply reacting to a rather common problem that you honestly seemed to be a part of.
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Originally Posted by Languor
Do you think that encouraging violence is a good direction for any movement to go in?
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It kind of depends on the situation, sometimes violence is necessary, even my flower-child, "lets solve our problems with a hug" mother understood that. Of course I don't think that beating random guys with a baseball bat is a great way to advance feminist ideals but I do think that the movement as a whole is much less radical and assertive than it needs to be. There really and truly is great harm being done to women in this country and the victories of past feminists are being undone. Voicing anger on a blog (which is all that is happening there, there really is no advocacy for violence) is quite honestly a rather tame reaction to the current state of things.