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Old 03-28-2012, 12:56 PM   #7126
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My boyfriend's gone to America for two and a half weeks and I'm stuck all alone because I have no money to go out and do anything and I'm already bored out of my mind.
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Old 03-28-2012, 06:49 PM   #7127
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I went to register for the spring semester but they're telling me I owe them money and can't register. Its supposed to come out automatically from my student loans so I never really check up on it, its supposed to come out first then I get whatever is left over. As soon as I got what was left over I gave it to my sister for rent for a few months, so its gone now and I don't have the money they want -_-*
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Old 03-28-2012, 08:00 PM   #7128
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My boyfriend's gone to America for two and a half weeks and I'm stuck all alone because I have no money to go out and do anything and I'm already bored out of my mind.
Where is he here?
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Old 03-28-2012, 08:09 PM   #7129
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Fucking tanks keep setting off my car alarm.
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Old 03-28-2012, 08:44 PM   #7130
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkarR...e_gdata_player

I really hope it doesn't kill the battery.
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Old 03-28-2012, 10:30 PM   #7131
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Can you just disarm the alarm? I know that with some cars the alarm is always on as long as all of the doors are locked (or in some cases as long as the driver's door is locked) but in mine the alarm does not engage if I lock the doors using the key, it only engages if I use the button or if the lock is already on when I close the door.
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Old 03-28-2012, 10:46 PM   #7132
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I just looked at the clock and I have no idea how it got this late, what the fuck happened to the last couple of hours?
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Old 03-28-2012, 11:07 PM   #7133
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Can you just disarm the alarm? I know that with some cars the alarm is always on as long as all of the doors are locked (or in some cases as long as the driver's door is locked) but in mine the alarm does not engage if I lock the doors using the key, it only engages if I use the button or if the lock is already on when I close the door.
Not at the time, no. The army really frowns upon stopping training for personal issues. Case in point, when my wife tried to kill herself when I was in the field for a month a few years ago, they wouldn't let me leave to see her. I think the only time I've actually done it was when I was point man during the movement up to an objective. I stepped on a cactus that went through my boot and into my heel that was so painful words cannot convey it. I sucked it up until we were at a short halt and asked a buddy to watch my sector while I tried to pull it out, but I needed help getting my boot off because of all the shit I was wearing. Pretty embarrassing, that.
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Old 03-29-2012, 04:09 AM   #7134
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Where is he here?
He's gone to Florida.
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Old 03-29-2012, 12:57 PM   #7135
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I've been trying to live by the Buddhist tenet of speech lately that goes "Before you speak, ask yourself: is it true, is it kind, and is it necessary?", and have really been struggling with the part about being kind; there's so much that makes me angry when I look around. And while it always feels righteous, every arsehole in the world thinks their bullshit is justified, right? I'm starting to worry that I'm just becoming embittered, and that a combination of a rough patch in the personal life, and the genuinely fucked-up nature of this world we live in, is slowly turning what I always considered my bullshit detector into nothing more than plain bad temper and hair-trigger aggression.

And on a not-improbably related note, I need to sleep so bad. I'm about two more sleepless nights away from caving and either going back to being a useless lifestyle-stoner, or hitting up the doctor to beg for the pills I've been trying so hard to avoid.
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Old 03-29-2012, 01:14 PM   #7136
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Most doctors only give a short course of sleeping pills Cuckoo, it's rare they prescribe for over a month. I can understand why you wouldn't want to go on sleeping pills though, those little bastards are addictive.
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Old 03-29-2012, 01:29 PM   #7137
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Yeah, this is it... having learned the hard way about my bullshit tendencies towards addiction, I really don't want to start a new one. After years of recreational drug use, I have enough contacts that an officially prescribed course coming to an end wouldn't stop me getting hold of more if I was desperate/determined enough. Besides which, it seems pointless - I'd only end up having the exact same problem when the course ended, but with an extra side of self-created craving in the mix.

On the other hand, I'm pretty sure I'm becoming very unpleasant to be around. :s
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Old 03-29-2012, 01:32 PM   #7138
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I take short courses of sleeping pills when my normal tablets don't work and my insomnia gets out of hand. If I haven't slept in four or five days, I start hallucinating and have no idea what's real. It gets pretty rough, especially when I think I can see cats everywhere.
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Old 03-29-2012, 01:46 PM   #7139
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Shit man, that's... wayyyy more extreme than mine! I just get cranky, mess up my sentences when I try to talk to people and generally become a giant bitchy chore of a bundle of nerves who can't hold coffee and nod at the same time without fucking it up. (Also become caught in that sweet spot midway between self-pity & self-loathing... although you probably figured that part out already!)

Still - cats and uncertain reality? Freaky shit, looks like I got off light!
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Old 03-29-2012, 01:48 PM   #7140
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It freaks me the fuck out when everywhere I go I see cats. Always slinky black cats as well. Seriously messes with my ability to determine what's real or not.
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Old 03-29-2012, 02:12 PM   #7141
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Damn. I'm not surprised - that's some pretty heavy shit.
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Old 03-29-2012, 02:15 PM   #7142
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It's brutal when I hit five days because I'm so tired that I get crazy ideas like maybe I should take too many pills just so I can sleep for a bit. It's driven me to the brink of suicide several times, it gets so bad.
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Old 03-29-2012, 02:22 PM   #7143
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I used to have that problem. I'd see ghosts though. I used to lay in my bed trying to force myself asleep twaked out on illegally obtained prescription sleep aids watching these grotesque shadow people trying to attack me. Ever since, I have had an unnatural fear of them, even though I know the probability of their existence is close to impossible. I am still paranoid though.
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Old 03-29-2012, 06:21 PM   #7144
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I've been trying to live by the Buddhist tenet of speech lately that goes "Before you speak, ask yourself: is it true, is it kind, and is it necessary?", and have really been struggling with the part about being kind; there's so much that makes me angry when I look around. And while it always feels righteous, every arsehole in the world thinks their bullshit is justified, right? I'm starting to worry that I'm just becoming embittered, and that a combination of a rough patch in the personal life, and the genuinely fucked-up nature of this world we live in, is slowly turning what I always considered my bullshit detector into nothing more than plain bad temper and hair-trigger aggression.

And on a not-improbably related note, I need to sleep so bad. I'm about two more sleepless nights away from caving and either going back to being a useless lifestyle-stoner, or hitting up the doctor to beg for the pills I've been trying so hard to avoid.
I went through a period where I had to decide if I was going to be a cynical bitch or chose a lighter path. I chose the lighter path, although it would have been a shit load easier (and much less of a battle) to be a cynical bitch. Everyday I have to make a concerted effort not to tell the world to fuck the hell off.

My ex would tell me he loved me, then he would do terrible things to me, tell me how I wasn't very attractive, how everything was my fault. I still have no idea how the fuck I survived him.

I came out of that period in my life hating everyone and myself and I can still remember walking through the open mall in Newcastle (NSW) and consciously making that decision not to let the past control my future.

Don't let the bastards win.

**Had to get a filling... $200 poorer and another one on monday (((((((
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Old 03-30-2012, 06:51 PM   #7145
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The bra situation is even more dire now that the under wire of two/three of my old bras have begun to come out and poke me. I'll have to go buy some more very soon.

In other news I had a ridiculous nightmare.

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I went to register for the spring semester but they're telling me I owe them money and can't register. Its supposed to come out automatically from my student loans so I never really check up on it, its supposed to come out first then I get whatever is left over. As soon as I got what was left over I gave it to my sister for rent for a few months, so its gone now and I don't have the money they want -_-*
Oh shit, that sucks. D: I wonder why student loans screwed up this term.
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Old 03-31-2012, 03:05 AM   #7146
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Thanks, Fruitbat; I'm trying to focus on the awesome people around me right now. Sorry to hear your ex was such as arsehole to you... I've never had any experience with that kind of relationship myself, but friends of mine have, and it's definitely not pretty. Hard enough to watch, let alone go through yourself.
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Old 03-31-2012, 03:20 AM   #7147
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Thanks, Fruitbat; I'm trying to focus on the awesome people around me right now. Sorry to hear your ex was such as arsehole to you... I've never had any experience with that kind of relationship myself, but friends of mine have, and it's definitely not pretty. Hard enough to watch, let alone go through yourself.
There you go CT - that's how you do it. Focus on the good, and tell the rest to fuck off.

Thanks, but I only said it so you'd be able to put my words into some perspective. I've been to the bottom of the hill/well/pit of despair and had to climb my way back up again. It's not an easy path, but the view at the top is worth it.
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Old 03-31-2012, 02:24 PM   #7148
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Fuck you squats, fuck you.
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Old 03-31-2012, 03:01 PM   #7149
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Fuck you squats, fuck you.
Do I need to pump you up?
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Couldn't rest, nah nigga I was stressed
Had me creepin' 'round corners, homie sleepin' in my vest.


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Old 03-31-2012, 03:03 PM   #7150
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I need some serious pumping.
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