Help me, please someone help me.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by JCC

Actually, I think that he'd be better off trying to socialise before he dabbles in psychiatry.

You've said that you want to help people, so join some kind of voluntary aid group, helping the homeless or the sick or what have you, and that way you'll meet people that you can hopefully become friends with too.

He's claimed he has Asperger's. Whether or not that's true, he has obvious problems socializing, and I think he could benefit from basic, general therapy.

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by JCC

Actually, I think that he'd be better off trying to socialise before he dabbles in psychiatry.

You've said that you want to help people, so join some kind of voluntary aid group, helping the homeless or the sick or what have you, and that way you'll meet people that you can hopefully become friends with too.

I was talking with Malice, and yeah, I agree. I just am not confident in myself.
Thanks for the advice . Want to chat on MSN sometime?

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

He's claimed he has Asperger's. Whether or not that's true, he has obvious problems socializing, and I think he could benefit from basic, general therapy.

I do have Asperger's. It is hell.
I can't understand why a person would lie about that .

[Man In Room 5]

Originally Posted by Opteron_Man

I do have Asperger's. It is hell.
I can't understand why a person would lie about that .

Because Asperger's is the new fashionable disease to have in the goth scene now that bi-polar disorder is played out. Asperger's is this century's consumption.

And because it provides an excuse for lack of attention span caused by a general lack of mental discipline.

[JCC]

I would've said that OCD is the mental affliction of the times.

"I alphabetize my DVDs, I must have Obsessive Compulsive!"

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by Man In Room 5

Because Asperger's is the new fashionable disease to have in the goth scene now that bi-polar disorder is played out. Asperger's is this century's consumption.

And because it provides an excuse for lack of attention span caused by a general lack of mental discipline.

Maybe your right, but I will do my best to clean myself up.

[Despanan]

Originally Posted by Opteron_Man

Maybe your right, but I will do my best to clean myself up.

So, have you actually been DIAGNOSED with Asperger's by a doctor, or did you just decide you have it?

[Man In Room 5]

Actually, Opteron, the best thing you can do is understand you're not so different from everyone else here. Everyone wishes they were better looking, cooler, smarter, what-have-you. Even if they already have those traits they wish they had them even more. The main difference between you and them is that you are constantly telling us your faults where most of us keep them to ourselves. I think a lot of the people here who consider you a loser do so not because of your faults but because you constantly write about the same crap everyone else worries about anyway. It's not your faults that are the issue, it's your constantly pointing them out. If you stop talking about your faults they will become a lot less noticeable. We are our own worst critics and if you just keep your mouth shut very few people will notice that stuff and you can avoid those people and hang out with the ones who are more accepting.

I'd also not worry so much about what people say on Gnet. One guy says your photos look good while another guy says you look stupid. Neither of them are authorities anyway so fuck 'em. There isn't much agreement here about anything stylistic because we really aren't all in the same scene. The idea that Gnet represents some specific subculture is bogus so don't try to appeal to our general consensus. Half the people here deny being goth or call themselves darkwave, deathrock or some other subgenre and then draw their own imaginary lines between these subgenres.

I'm pretty sure my idea of cool differs from Ophie, JCC, Jillian, Kontan or any of the other respected members here. The fact that we have so many various styles among our top posters proves that there's no one single magic rule to obey. For that matter, I don't even live up to my own idea of cool any better than you do. I stopped dressing punk/goth over a decade ago even tho it's my favorite look. I just can't be bothered anymore. If I go to a club/bar and someone doesn't like my looks they can fuck off and I'll talk to other people instead. Last weekend I went to a upper class bar dressed like a working class stiff and nobody said a damned thing and I enjoyed myself. So, there's no standard within any group or even with 1 single person over time. Some people here have criticized the way you look or act but you'd probably fit into any of the bars/clubs/shows I've seen without a problem.

[KontanKarite]

I can't believe I'm about to say this...

Join the military.

[Alarica]

If you do have aspergers, and you are struggling to get a grip on it and manage, there is a lot of support available for you. Only off the top of my head I only have the info for parents of a child with it. Sometimes it makes a bigger difference to have someone you can just yell at, and get it all off your chest, before you see things in a better light. Maybe feeling like this is a good thing. If you feel this low now, things will only get better.

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by Despanan

So, have you actually been DIAGNOSED with Asperger's by a doctor, or did you just decide you have it?

Oh sorry, I didn't think to say. I have been DIAGNOSED with Asperger's.

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by Man In Room 5

Actually, Opteron, the best thing you can do is understand you're not so different from everyone else here. Everyone wishes they were better looking, cooler, smarter, what-have-you. Even if they already have those traits they wish they had them even more. The main difference between you and them is that you are constantly telling us your faults where most of us keep them to ourselves. I think a lot of the people here who consider you a loser do so not because of your faults but because you constantly write about the same crap everyone else worries about anyway. It's not your faults that are the issue, it's your constantly pointing them out. If you stop talking about your faults they will become a lot less noticeable. We are our own worst critics and if you just keep your mouth shut very few people will notice that stuff and you can avoid those people and hang out with the ones who are more accepting.

I'd also not worry so much about what people say on Gnet. One guy says your photos look good while another guy says you look stupid. Neither of them are authorities anyway so fuck 'em. There isn't much agreement here about anything stylistic because we really aren't all in the same scene. The idea that Gnet represents some specific subculture is bogus so don't try to appeal to our general consensus. Half the people here deny being goth or call themselves darkwave, deathrock or some other subgenre and then draw their own imaginary lines between these subgenres.

I'm pretty sure my idea of cool differs from Ophie, JCC, Jillian, Kontan or any of the other respected members here. The fact that we have so many various styles among our top posters proves that there's no one single magic rule to obey. For that matter, I don't even live up to my own idea of cool any better than you do. I stopped dressing punk/goth over a decade ago even tho it's my favorite look. I just can't be bothered anymore. If I go to a club/bar and someone doesn't like my looks they can fuck off and I'll talk to other people instead. Last weekend I went to a upper class bar dressed like a working class stiff and nobody said a damned thing and I enjoyed myself. So, there's no standard within any group or even with 1 single person over time. Some people here have criticized the way you look or act but you'd probably fit into any of the bars/clubs/shows I've seen without a problem.

You are right, you hit the nail on the head. I am trying to make a good hard effert to clean myself up. I am saving your advice and all the other ones from others. I do talk about what is inside of me, too much.
I will try to pull back a bit. Thanks for the advice.

MSN chat maybe?

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

I can't believe I'm about to say this...

Join the military.

I did want to join the military. But I don't know....
I just never went back.

[Despanan]

Who knows? It might help. Just don't get yourself killed.

In my opinion, the thing that annoys me about you is that you seem so obsessed with so much trivial shit. Well that and those dumbassed conspiracy theories and faux-technology you seem to take as gospel. You're in your mid-twenties or something aren't you? Your grasp on reality seems to be that of a ten-year old sometimes.

I'd honestly suggest therapy and/or drugs to help you deal with your disorder. I suppose it's not your fault that you've got a somewhat distorted view of the world around you, if your brain isn't functioning at 100%.

[Alarica]

Originally Posted by Despanan

if your brain isn't functioning at 100%.

Are you serious? Use the internet to do something useful and look up Aspergers.

People I know with the disorder are incredibly intelligent, nearly always focus on a specific thing they are good at and literally obsess over it. They are literal thinkers, and because of that cant see life the way the rest of the world sees it, pretty much. They DO take things as gospel, it's how they end up being targets to people for ridicule. Aspergers isnt usually treated with drugs either. It's an Autistic spectrum disorder. Drugs make it worse. All drugs, be they prescribed or alcohol or even illegals. If he does have Aspergers, the doctor who diagnosed him should have access to support systems for him. He needs to be taught how to cope, by retraining the way he thinks. It isnt easy, but it can be done. The same way adhd can more often than not be sorted with a strict diet. Fucking america and its obsession with therapy and drugs.

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by Despanan

Who knows? It might help. Just don't get yourself killed.

In my opinion, the thing that annoys me about you is that you seem so obsessed with so much trivial shit. Well that and those dumbassed conspiracy theories and faux-technology you seem to take as gospel. You're in your mid-twenties or something aren't you? Your grasp on reality seems to be that of a ten-year old sometimes.

I'd honestly suggest therapy and/or drugs to help you deal with your disorder. I suppose it's not your fault that you've got a somewhat distorted view of the world around you, if your brain isn't functioning at 100%.

As of the past few monthes, I have backed off from flying saucer shit, the free energy scemes and things that are not right infront of me.
You didn't know that I shelved most of that stuff. I should have said something.

[Opteron_Man]

Originally Posted by Alarica

Are you serious? Use the internet to do something useful and look up Aspergers.

People I know with the disorder are incredibly intelligent, nearly always focus on a specific thing they are good at and literally obsess over it. They are literal thinkers, and because of that cant see life the way the rest of the world sees it, pretty much. They DO take things as gospel, it's how they end up being targets to people for ridicule. Aspergers isnt usually treated with drugs either. It's an Autistic spectrum disorder. Drugs make it worse. All drugs, be they prescribed or alcohol or even illegals. If he does have Aspergers, the doctor who diagnosed him should have access to support systems for him. He needs to be taught how to cope, by retraining the way he thinks. It isnt easy, but it can be done. The same way adhd can more often than not be sorted with a strict diet. Fucking america and its obsession with therapy and drugs.

I hear you, I agreee with what you are saying. I do obses sometimes on one thing. But I don't want to pour drugs down my throat to fix my mental problem.

[JCC]

Don't join the military. Ever.

[Alarica]

I'm glad to hear it, but you also need to stop viewing it as a mental problem. That makes it sound so negative. It's no more a problem than any other condition. The key to your's though is getting the right advice and the right help. I dont know how you are affected by it, but a friend of mine finds it hard to empathise. He is brilliant with languages and music, so thats what he focuses on. As for the obsessing, everyone does it, but you probably more aware of doing it.

Someone said you are good at speaking in front of people. Use that! Personally I hate speaking in large groups. I really hate the attention. Give yourself credit where it's due, and dont worry too much about what other people think. Be comfortable with yourself. You are the one who has to live with you!

[Despanan]

Originally Posted by Alarica

I'm glad to hear it, but you also need to stop viewing it as a mental problem. That makes it sound so negative.

Yes, lets stop looking at mental disorders as negative things. After all, it's certainly made Opteron Man's life so much easier. Hell the way you're talking about it, I'm starting to think he may have some sort of a super-power.

Just because a couple of hippies want to act like it's just a "difference" doesn't change the fact that it's severely limiting his ability to communicate and accurately assess the world around him.

I love how you automatically jump from telling me that I'm wrong for recommending, of all things, *gasp!* drugs and therapy! (When will we foolish Americans learn that the best way to deal with a problem is to do nothing about it?) and in the same breath tell me to "use the internet for something useful".

Well I'll tell you what, I did, and guess what? The Internet Says The Same Thing I Did. I mean sure there are problems sometimes associated with different drugs, guess what? There are always problems associated with certain treatments, particularly when you're dealing with brain chemistry. THAT'S WHY YOU WORK WITH A DOCTOR TO FIGURE OUT WHAT WORKS AND WHAT DOESN'T. But no, since "Americans" obviously have such a hard-on for "Drugs and therapy" we should TOTALLY abandon all drugs because they "always make it worse" in favor of being "taught how to cope" (how exactly is that different from therapy?)

You, Dear sir or Madam, are a goddamn idiot.

[a morbid curiosity]

Originally Posted by Despanan

Yes, lets stop looking at mental disorders as negative things. After all, it's certainly made Opteron Man's life so much easier. Hell the way you're talking about it, I'm starting to think he may have some sort of a super-power.

Just because a couple of hippies want to act like it's just a "difference" doesn't change the fact that it's severely limiting his ability to communicate and accurately assess the world around him.

I love how you automatically jump from telling me that I'm wrong for recommending, of all things, *gasp!* drugs and therapy! (When will we foolish Americans learn that the best way to deal with a problem is to do nothing about it?) and in the same breath tell me to "use the internet for something useful".

Well I'll tell you what, I did, and guess what? The Internet Says The Same Thing I Did. I mean sure there are problems sometimes associated with different drugs, guess what? There are always problems associated with certain treatments, particularly when you're dealing with brain chemistry. THAT'S WHY YOU WORK WITH A DOCTOR TO FIGURE OUT WHAT WORKS AND WHAT DOESN'T. But no, since "Americans" obviously have such a hard-on for "Drugs and therapy" we should TOTALLY abandon all drugs because they "always make it worse" in favor of being "taught how to cope" (how exactly is that different from therapy?)

You, Dear sir or Madam, are a goddamn idiot.

Some of this is true, but Alarica's not totally wrong either.
It's not as though every single symptom and every single problem caused by Asperger's can be magically eradicated by medication.
And, for a lot of people, AS can be worsened by medication---it says so in the very wikipedia article you referenced, actually: "Individuals with AS may be unable to identify and communicate their internal moods and emotions or to tolerate side effects that for most people would not be problematic.[72]"

I have a friend with Asperger's (yes... diagnosed...) and for him, viewing it as a "problem" makes it worse as he feels more isolated and refuses to see the point of connecting with others, as understanding them fully is futile.

So I can see your point that medication and therapy could be a good idea, but I just wouldn't immediately jump to it in this case.

[Alarica]

Originally Posted by Despanan

You, Dear sir or Madam, are a goddamn idiot.

Take that, and apply it to yourself. Wikipedia? Honestly, you fool.

Use the net to research Aspergers syndrome properly.

I would also suggest that the next time you attempt to look like you know everything and claim others to be idiots, you learn to read, before getting all upset and piss yourself because someone dared to voice a gripe about Americans. People slag off the Brits all the time. Do I care? Not in the slightest.

I didnt say abandon all drugs, I said Aspergers isnt usually treated with drugs. I have seen for myself the adverse effect drugs have on someone with AS. It is also a known fact amongst people with an ounce of intelligence, that alcohol is a depressant. Therefore I think you'll find it logical to assume that putting a chemical into an already depressed person, that will make them more depressed, will infact make them worse. Drugs do infact help a lot of people with varying conditions, and they help improve quality of life for many. I have seen this, and live as such myself.

Also, therapy is well known to be the americans answer to everything, and is completely different to support systems that can offer detailed information to people, about their condition, and help them live a better life. Not everything can be fixed sitting in a doctors office crying, on in group therapy sessions crying into someones cleavage. Appealing as this sounds. The flip side is the Brits answer to everything is to put the kettle on for a cup of tea and pretend nothing's wrong.

If nothing else read the curious incident of the dog in the night time. Stop being so defensive too. I'm not attacking you.

[KontanKarite]

No. You know what, Alarica or whatever her name is, is a fucking bigoted cunt if you ask me.

You know what. Fuck it. I'm claiming my nationality. I'm American. Anyone got any problems with that? Now, when anyone says, "You Americans and your blah blah blah", you're going to have to own up to insulting one of your friends.

As far as I'm concerned with Alarica, she's a fucking bitch.

[Despanan]

Originally Posted by a morbid curiosity

It's not as though every single symptom and every single problem caused by Asperger's can be magically eradicated by medication.

This was never my argument. However Alaricia's argument was not "You should be careful about drugs, as some can make it worse" it was:

Originally Posted by Alaricia

Aspergers isnt usually treated with drugs either. It's an Autistic spectrum disorder. Drugs make it worse. All drugs, be they prescribed or alcohol or even illegals.

This is 100%, without a doubt, completely wrong. It's also a goddamn stupid thing to say (I like how she implies that illegal drugs would be viewed to be better for him as opposed to what his doctor prescribes). Face it, the girl is an idiot.

I have a friend with Asperger's (yes... diagnosed...) and for him, viewing it as a "problem" makes it worse as he feels more isolated and refuses to see the point of connecting with others, as understanding them fully is futile.

That sounds like a personal issue for your friend. Denying reality and pretending that a problem doesn't exist is not what's going to solve it. it might make OP feel better, but that's it. If his only goal is to feel better he might as well start shooting Heroine for all the good it will do him.

So I can see your point that medication and therapy could be a good idea, but I just wouldn't immediately jump to it in this case.

Honestly, I appericiate the sentiment of your post. It's honest and moderate, but in this case I don't think this type of moderation is the sensible thing. He's already tried doing nothing (ie: trying harder by himself) and look where that's gotten him. If he's at the point where he's drunkenly pouring his heart out and asking for advice from strangers on the internet I think his problem may be a little bigger than: "Think positive and find a support group".

[JCC]

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

No. You know what, Alarica or whatever her name is, is a fucking bigoted cunt if you ask me.

You know what. Fuck it. I'm claiming my nationality. I'm American. Anyone got any problems with that? Now, when anyone says, "You Americans and your blah blah blah", you're going to have to own up to insulting one of your friends.

She said 'America', not 'Americans'.