Egads! It's Bad Movie Lines

Jaye Jang · 06-05-2008, 10:17 PM

Okay, Opteron Man. This is your fault. Your thread got me thinking (which is always dangerous) about good movie lines. Bad news: They get stuck in your head -- sort of like bad song lyrics. What's worse, now I not only have good movie lines (like "Go ahead, make my day") stuck in my head -- but totally sucky movie lines.

So - bad movie lines: "You don't know whether you want to kiss me or slap me. I have that effect on men." Madonna in Dick Tracy.

So, anyone other sufferers, I mean, takers?

gothicusmaximus · 06-05-2008, 10:30 PM

"Some mothafuckahs are always trying to ice skate up-hill"- Blade, in the eponymous film, after delivering the coup de grace to an evil vampire lord.

"Future events such as these may effect you in the future!"-- Narrator, Plan Nine from Outer Space

"They're eating her! And then they're going to eat me! Oh my GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!"- Arnold, Troll 2

"These evil creatures can transform themselves into flesh and blood people, whenever and however they want."
"You made a mistake, Grandpa. You said 'can'. You should have said they could. Otherwise, what kind of a fairytale is it?"
"They can. They CAN! GOBLINS STILL EXIST! Your Grandpa Seth is telling you!"
--Grandpa Seth and Joshua, Troll 2

"What are you looking at?"
"You."
- Two characters whose names I don't remember, August Rush

TopHaggardDoll · 06-06-2008, 01:12 AM

"Don't you know who I am? I'm the Juggernaut, bitch" - Juggernaught, X-Men 3.

"You're everyone's problem. That's because every time you go up in the air, you're unsafe. I don't like you because you're dangerous"
"That's right! Ice... man. I am dangerous" - IceMan and Maverick, Top Gun.
Even their names are stupid.

"God, he loved flying with you Maverick. But he would've done it anyway... without you. He'd have hated it, but he would've done it" - That blonde woman in Top Gun

I could be here all day I reckon.

Raptor · 06-06-2008, 02:50 AM

"Theres an event happening"

Some new movie I saw a trailer for. I forget the name, it had some teacher telling his class to be worried that the bees are dying and then they lose contact with the rest of the world.

Beowulf · 06-06-2008, 10:50 AM

One thing`s for sure, Inspector Clays dead, murdered, and somebodys responsible !!!.

Another classic line from `Plan Nine From Outer Space`

Malice In Wonderland · 06-06-2008, 12:58 PM

I spy a new game coming up: Let's all turn OM's threads the other way round.
As found by Duck.

As for bad movie lines...
Most of the Iron Man script?

Beowulf · 06-29-2008, 10:24 AM

Some more classic movie dialogue ...

Bad Taste ...

Barry: Why can't aliens be friendly?
Derek: There's no glowing fingers on these bastards, we've got a bunch of Extra-Terrestrial psychopaths on our hands, like a visit from a planet full of Charlie Mansons, they've started on something small, its my guess they'll go onto something bigger next time, Christchurch, Wellington...
Barry: Auckland?
Derek: Yeah well that wouldn't be so bad.

And one more from Plan 9 From Outer Space ...

Alien Commander: "Plan 9 deals with the resurrection of the dead. Long distance electrodes shot into the pineal pituitary glands of recent dead. Have you attempted any of this plan as yet?"
Eros: "Yes, Excellency."
Alien Commander: "How successful has it been?"
Eros: "We have risen two so far. We shall be just as successful on more."

LiUsAiDh · 06-29-2008, 11:33 AM

My vote goes to the entire scipt for Norbit.

xParadigmx · 06-29-2008, 01:52 PM

:lets call them ass blasters

:ass blasters? that sounds like a p*rno

some sci fi movie that austin made me watch like, 8 times.

Samyania · 06-30-2008, 02:31 PM

About 80% of Pitch Black is awesome. Unfortunately, the other 20% is really lame.
Like anything Jack says:
"Gotta kill a few people."
"'Kay! I can do it!"
Most of the things Johns says:
(After shooting Riddick loose with great machismo) "I want you to remember this moment. The way it coulda gone and didn't."
(And Riddick's eloquent response? "FUCK you!")
A good number of Riddick's lines:
"You're not afraid of the dark, are you?"
"I dunno what's gonna happen when the lights go out, Carolyn, but I do know... once the dying starts, this little psycho-fuck family of ours is gonna rip itself apart."
And after she dies to save him:
"No! Not for me!...not for me!"

And the sequel is 80% bad and 20% awesome.

Jaye Jang · 07-03-2008, 06:29 AM

Treat Williams, when he takes on the giant squid in "Deep Rising": "Now there's something you don't see every day." Well, duh!

LiUsAiDh · 07-03-2008, 06:49 AM

"Anakin...you're breaking my heart" - Oh no! (Star Wars)

"Everybody listen! We have to put a barrier between us and the snakes!"

"Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!"

"Make it fast, time is tissue."

"Don't worry, Mary-Kate. His hair plugs can't hurt you."

All from Snakes on a PLANE!!!!!!!!! Dang, thats bad!

Duane · 07-10-2008, 01:11 PM

MONKEY! bob-omb! both from the Super Mario Bros Movie.

gothicusmaximus · 07-10-2008, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LiUsAiDh

"Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!"

Actually, this is the 'Egads! It's Bad Movie Lines' thread. You seem to be looking for the '100 Best Lines In Movie History' poll, which is elsewhere.

LiUsAiDh · 07-11-2008, 04:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gothicusmaximus

Actually, this is the 'Egads! It's Bad Movie Lines' thread. You seem to be looking for the '100 Best Lines In Movie History' poll, which is elsewhere.

I just find it overused and unfunny, it's an opinion. You have yours, I have mine.

disorder · 07-11-2008, 04:36 AM

'Do they have Toast in America?' - Little girl in Flight Plan

Sir Canvas Corpsey · 07-13-2008, 02:42 AM

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's stuck by lightning? The same thing as everything else!!! -kzap!- - Storm, X-men the Movie

Childe_Roland · 07-13-2008, 02:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir Canvas Corpsey

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's stuck by lightning? The same thing as everything else!!! -kzap!- - Storm, X-men the Movie

Man, seriously. Is that not the stupidest fucking line ever? It's this kind of thing that gets me through rejection slips. I think to myself, "Well, if I never make it writing novels, I can always be a Hollywood screenwriter."

Blergh...

Sir Canvas Corpsey · 07-13-2008, 03:41 AM

You'd never find a line like that in one of my plays!

Minyaliel · 07-13-2008, 04:29 AM

Any line from "Shock Treatment" and "Alien". I don't need to quote both scripts, I hope. *blergh*

Sir Canvas Corpsey · 07-13-2008, 04:49 AM

I personally loved Shock Treatment!

"I'm not a loco with motive..." is probably one of my favourite lines in movie history.

Childe_Roland · 07-13-2008, 08:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir Canvas Corpsey

You'd never find a line like that in one of my plays!

Nor mine! But, you'll note, I said a "Hollywood screenwriter" not a "good screenwriter." The condition of cinema has convinced me that the ability to hustle fast enough to make it has far superseded anything resembling talent.

Minyaliel · 07-14-2008, 02:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir Canvas Corpsey

I personally loved Shock Treatment!

"I'm not a loco with motive..." is probably one of my favourite lines in movie history.

Hm, to me it was a great disappointment; come to think of it I had the same feelings about Grease 2. Not the same lead actors, boring plot and bad jokes. I don't think I managed to really laugh once. And it had lost the charm and magic that was inherent in RHPS, too, for some reason. But each to their own. =)

Sir Canvas Corpsey · 07-14-2008, 03:12 AM

One problem people often had with it, was it not comparing to RHPS which is something that never crossed my mind. I think it only takes effect if you approach it as a sequel, if you look at it as a stand alone piece, I think it vastly changes how you feel and view the film.

Minyaliel · 07-14-2008, 03:59 AM

I guess. I saw it right after seeing RHPS, with only a coffee break inbetween, so... *shrug*