Really could use some support...

carakitty · 08-03-2010, 03:55 PM

Words can not describe the depths of my sadness right now. I am 99% sure that we will be putting our eldest cat to sleep very soon. Within a matter of days if not hours. Took him to the Vet again today. He's lost a full pound in one week and has such a severe case of Glaucoma and hemorrhaging in one of his eyes that he's 'crying' blood. The selfish and hideously hopeful part of me wants to fork out the money to remove the bad eye but he's 18 years old, has Hyperthyroidism, Chronic Renal Failure, is showing signs of a bad heart, and if the operation itself didn't kill him it is quite likely that the recovery could. My friend will be sorely missed but I love him too much to let him suffer. I don't know what else to say, I don't think there is anything left to say.

Alan · 08-03-2010, 04:18 PM

Oh my god, I don't know what I'll do when that happens with my cat. But you're a good person; your heart is in the right place.
Just make him feel loved and pamper him for the little while he has left.

Methadrine · 08-03-2010, 04:43 PM

And always keep a photo of your cat in your wallet. I've lost five cats over the years and they are all in there, so they're always with me in spirit, wherever I go. ...and yes, I had to put one of them to sleep the same way you have to, still hurts like hell (been 11 years now) but it was for the best. The last look in that cats eyes said he knew too.

Wish there were anything else I could say, but you know how it is. My thoughts will be with you.

lady_cthulhu · 08-03-2010, 05:20 PM

You have my sympathies, carakitty. I wouldn't know what to do in your position, and I understand the desire to fight for your cat's life, it's not selfish so please don't feel that way. I'd fight just as hard for mine, and I can only imagine the pain you must feel trying to decide what's really best. No matter what happens, take comfort in the fact that you gave him a good life, and I'm sure he knows how much you love him.

Methadrine has a good idea too, about keeping the pictures. I keep their old collars and ID tags. I don't have all of them, it's something I just started doing, but I often wish I had some momento of the others. It helps.

Lethe · 08-03-2010, 05:50 PM

My cat's in pretty much the same condition. He's actually older than me, and he's been my little furball since I can remember. He's about twenty years old right now and he only eats a little and doesn't move much. I feel your pain Carakitty, and I wish I could ease it for the both of us.

Solumina · 08-03-2010, 05:57 PM

I'm so sorry to hear that. Just focus on the 18 wonderful years that he has had and know that you both gave each other much joy. You have done everything that you can for him and though it isn't easy it is time to let go. Be there with him as long as you can and make him as comfortable as you can.

Saya · 08-03-2010, 06:18 PM

I'm so sorry. I know what you mean, there was a selfish part of me that really just wanted to do everything to keep Jess alive, but when they're really old you have to know that at that point the cure is probably worse than the disease. At least when he's put down its very quick and very painless. That doesn't make it much easier, I know. Take good care of yourself, too, take the time you need to mourn.

allyssa · 08-03-2010, 06:53 PM

My cat recently died and he was my first true love. I miss him so much but the pain gets less every day. ....the worst thing about losing a pet is that some people won't understand just how much they mean to you and how much you love them. I am so happy that everybody here understands.

carakitty · 08-04-2010, 08:14 AM

Thanks everyone.
He will be crossing The Bridge tonight. We have an appointment tonight at 745.
It is interestingly enough my dearly departed brother Stench's birthday today too.
It makes me smile to think I'm giving him a present.
But even better to know that my old man won't be hurting anymore.
He truly has been a stoic cat.

blu · 08-04-2010, 08:32 AM

You're doing the right thing.

My cat, at the young age of five, had to be put down four years ago due to a heart valve defect which the kitty cardiologist herself was baffled over. She was my baby...we thought we could keep her going on meds, but she just stopped eating. She made the choice.
She went peacefully in my arms. I still have her ashes.

Pets are our companion spirits, here for a painfully short time but the impact they make on our lives is unreal. You'll meet up with your old friend again some day.

Ben Lahnger · 08-04-2010, 10:21 AM

Cara, I'm sorry you are going through this, and I'm sorry to learn you are losing such a close friend. But I am so impressed with you for recognizing the selfish nature of wishing to keep him around when he is suffering. You've made a wise choice, and while the pain of making that choice won't fade soon, you're heart should find some balm in knowing you've done the very best you can for your friend.

Farewell, classy, stoic cat and beloved companion.

MollyMac · 08-04-2010, 03:19 PM

I am sorry to hear it, but putting his comfort above your own wants is the kindest decision you will ever make. I only wish I could make it hurt less.

Li'l Miss Sticky Kiss · 08-04-2010, 08:27 PM

Please remember there are those who wish to support you in your time of grief. Gather those who have an understanding of the trauma, and ignore the ignorance of others.
My heart goes out to you in these days of pain ahead. I have never forgotten the animals I have lost, but in time, it hurts less. I know it is not the same, but think I can speak for many and say "We are crying with you, you are not alone!"

Fruitbat · 08-05-2010, 12:12 AM

Cara, Sorry to hear that you are losing your friend/cat. I can't really add to what has already been said.

It's never easy to say goodbye. Try and remember him in a positive light. I bet in 18 years, he's done some silly cat things.

**hug**

HumanePain · 08-05-2010, 06:16 AM

Wow, 18 years! He used all of his nine lives. It is time.
Sorry.

Anarasha · 08-05-2010, 07:16 AM

I am really sorry to hear that.. I hope you will be okay.
Just remember all the good times. Try not to think too much on the end,
but know you did the right thing.

ape descendant · 08-05-2010, 10:00 AM

Loosing a loved kitty sucks. *Hugs*

Apathy's_Child · 08-06-2010, 02:20 AM

You're doing the right thing, but it sucks and I'm really sorry to hear about it.

carakitty · 08-06-2010, 08:04 AM

Thanks for the support everyone.
I know we did the right thing. Still didn't make it any easier to do.
Knowing that he is no longer suffering is quite a comfort.
I will cherish the memories and pictures of happy times past, and delight in the kitties who are still with us.

ape descendant · 08-07-2010, 11:18 PM

While I know that it still hurts and sucks... if you wanted to get another kitty, perhaps you could adopt one from a shelter and save its life... I dunno.. there's no replacing a person (I include house kitties in this term) but sometimes being able to save a life helps to soften the blow of an older life lost...

This is probably shitty and bad logic...I apologize.

MollyMac · 08-08-2010, 08:48 AM

There is another bright star in the skies tonight. Feel sad, wistful, feel it all. If she was not a friend, it would not hurt. Big hugs

carakitty · 08-08-2010, 09:44 AM

AD- I understand what you're saying =) When it's time to have another animal in our family, we'll know. We've almost always relied on fate for our animal companion additions.

Molly- Yes indeed. Thanks for the hugs, and right back at ya.

Apathy's_Child · 08-11-2010, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ape descendant

While I know that it still hurts and sucks... if you wanted to get another kitty, perhaps you could adopt one from a shelter and save its life... I dunno.. there's no replacing a person (I include house kitties in this term) but sometimes being able to save a life helps to soften the blow of an older life lost...

This is probably shitty and bad logic...I apologize.

No, it's true in my experience - a new pet will obviously never replace the old one, but it can help to fill the hole they leave. Just get one that's completely different (e.g. don't replace a black cat with a black kitten).

Hearts_Purple · 08-11-2010, 09:22 AM

I haven't responded to this yet because it fills me with sorrow about my own cat's passing. I am sorry you had to have him put down, but you loved him and had many good years with him.

*hugz*

carakitty · 08-12-2010, 09:13 PM

AC- Just because felines look the same doesn't mean they will act the same. But I understand your general point. Thankfully, we've already got our hands full still! And, fate just might come around sooner than expected. One of my friends may need to rehome her Sphynx kitty and if she does I will fight to get it into a good home (even if it's not mine

) because I can't stand the thought of him going to the unethical breeder she bought him from.

Wolfie- *hugs* to you too. May you grieve well.