US school cancels prom 'over lesbian date'

[Ben Lahnger]

Some forms of segregation have been deemed illegal, social or otherwise. If the people who were excluded from society in the past had just said, "Fuck it, they're assholes, I don't want to hang with such bigots" and not pursued justice, where would we be? Social injustices are ruled on and laws are passed to prevent them on a regular basis in this country. In fact, there's one that's being proposed right now called the Student Non-Discrimination Act (HR 4530) that attempts to make sure this can't be done again.

[Alan]

I bet you anything you fucking want you put these kids in any other scenario and they won't even remotely act homophobic.

[Entropic]

Here's a question no one has asked: Were there any other lesbians at the prom?

[KontanKarite]

Originally Posted by Ben Lahnger

Some forms of segregation have been deemed illegal, social or otherwise. If the people who were excluded from society in the past had just said, "Fuck it, they're assholes, I don't want to hang with such bigots" and not pursued justice, where would we be? Social injustices are ruled on and laws are passed to prevent them on a regular basis in this country. In fact, there's one that's being proposed right now called the Student Non-Discrimination Act (HR 4530) that attempts to make sure this can't be done again.

I somehow doubt that this bill would prevent this kind of thing from happening. No amount of legislation will prevent bigots from being bigots unless bigotry is outright deemed unlawful and it's not.

The school should be fined for not even having the prom, these assholes should be smarter about how to be bigots, they should also be constantly publicly shamed and reminded as to how much they are bigots.

[creature6]

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

I somehow doubt that this bill would prevent this kind of thing from happening. No amount of legislation will prevent bigots from being bigots unless bigotry is outright deemed unlawful and it's not.

The school should be fined for not even having the prom, these assholes should be smarter about how to be bigots, they should also be constantly publicly shamed and reminded as to how much they are bigots.

Agreed....

[KontanKarite]

As for your link, Lahnger, I did send it out to whomever it was sent to through them. Hopefully it does help because it may not prevent stuff like this from happening, but it may help make things better for everyone at schools nationwide.

[Saya]

Originally Posted by Entropic

Here's a question no one has asked: Were there any other lesbians at the prom?

I think they'd post it if another lesbian couple were allowed to go as a couple, wouldn't they use that as proof that "we're not bigots!" instead of starting a facebook group "Constance quit yer crying" where they talk about the abomination that is homosexuality? Sad thing is chances are there are other gay classmates that are in the closet, one of my friends tells me his high school was homophobic, and he would often do and say really nasty things to the few students who were out, even though he's gay.

They also sent two students who had learning disabilities to the fake prom. Hooray for non-diversity, I guess.

[Tam Li Hua]

I have to say, I think both sides have taken Prom far too seriously.

I don't know which side to believe at this point, to be honest; I can see the possibility of both, I guess. I dunno.

[Saya]

Originally Posted by Tam Li Hua

I have to say, I think both sides have taken Prom far too seriously.

I don't know which side to believe at this point, to be honest; I can see the possibility of both, I guess. I dunno.

What, you don't believe that the school cancelled prom rather than let a lesbian couple show up? Because they pretty much admit to it.

Its not about taking prom too seriously, its about discrimination in public schools.

[Tam Li Hua]

No, I mean about the alternate prom vs. the party. I can't decide if they really did that to embarrass the lez chick, or if they just wanted some peace and quiet.

My opinion, they should have just let the girl come to regular prom. Would have saved everyone a LOT of trouble.

[Saya]

If it was really just for peace and quiet, why did they do it to five other students that they apparently also pick on a lot? And why start the facebook group? And besides, in that same post, again, she mentions that she just doesn't want Constance to get her own way and drag the school through the mud, its stupid to say it wasn't about sticking it up to Constance when you later go on to say that it was exactly that.

[Ben Lahnger]

The law would address the kind of institutionalized bigorty that was exhibited by the school board (which IS a tax payer funded organization), which might prevent the kind of actions that started this thing.

Constance has asked her supporters to not seek any kind of retribution against her classmates. But it doesn't sound like the door is closed on further civil action against the school board. I would like to see how the judge's decision in the first case to accept the school board's reprentative's statement that Candace would be invited to the private prom would be interpreted in further action.

Interesting sidebar: my sister, who is an extremely conservative religious person, said, "Even though I believe homosexuality to be unhealthy, the behavior of the school board and her classmates was just mean."

[Saya]

Originally Posted by Ben Lahnger

Interesting sidebar: my sister, who is an extremely conservative religious person, said, "Even though I believe homosexuality to be unhealthy, the behavior of the school board and her classmates was just mean."

Really? Your sister is uber conservative? I can't imagine this. I'd love to be a fly on the wall at your family gatherings.

[Ben Lahnger]

Yeah, she used to be much more progressive, but she got married then joined this church and ... whoopsie!

I get into half-arguments with her from time to time (mind you, I tend to be a moderate centrist but will back a good idea, weighed on it's own merits, from either party) ... but I know there's a line I walk up to and then stop so I don't create a hostile family environment. And I don't have much trouble keeping quiet when she goes on a conservative rant.

I just wish she'd stop praying for me so much.

[Solumina]

If those kids really did just want to have a dram free party they would have held the events on separate dates. Have one real prom and then have another party. It would have cost the same amount (perhaps quite a but less as you could try and get a discount from vendors for booking them for two events) and, more importantly, the students who honestly just want to have a good time wouldn't have had to pick between doing the right thing or continuing to be socially accepted.

Originally Posted by Man In Room 5

I only wonder if Ellen will retract the scholarship 3 weeks from now when whats-her-face renounces her lesbian relationship as "a phase" like 90% of high school girls do.

This right here really pisses me off. Women have fluid sexuality. It isn't like male sexuality which tends to be fairly ridged, it is normal for a woman to be bisexual during her late teens. It isn't about attention or rebellion, sure that has a lot to do with it becoming a popular fact to advertise, but the same number of women would be attracted to other women for a period of time, they just wouldn't feel the social pressure to denounce their actions later.

[Underwater Ophelia]

I don't have a problem with them excluding Constance either because they don't like gays or because they blame her for not having a real prom.

Why'd they have to also exclude the mentally disabled kids?

[Solumina]

My guess is that they didn't trust peer pressure to keep them from telling Constance. That or they aren't comfortable around the mentally handicapped and thought that having them there would make prom less fun.

[Joker_in_the_Pack]

Originally Posted by gothicusmaximus

Believe it or not, I actually don't like to derail discussions with tangential remarks, but I have to say-- god, this is dumb.

Huh.. upon closer inspection, yeah it is.

Strike that from the record.

[Apathy's_Child]

Originally Posted by Alan

I bet you anything you fucking want you put these kids in any other scenario and they won't even remotely act homophobic.

Nothing about this situation supports that hypothesis. Besides, even if it's true, it's not as though they're little kids - they're old enough that "Waaaah!! I want PROOOOOM!" isn't an excuse for not taking a stand. It isn't even about whether they liked the chick or not.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Saya

Really? Your sister is uber conservative? I can't imagine this. I'd love to be a fly on the wall at your family gatherings.

You should meet my family.

[Tam Li Hua]

Originally Posted by Saya

If it was really just for peace and quiet, why did they do it to five other students that they apparently also pick on a lot? And why start the facebook group? And besides, in that same post, again, she mentions that she just doesn't want Constance to get her own way and drag the school through the mud, its stupid to say it wasn't about sticking it up to Constance when you later go on to say that it was exactly that.

You have excellent points that I can't argue with.

I don't understand what's wrong with that school. Even for the South..even for Mississippi...this is really ridiculous.

Ophelia, that's an excellent question as well. I think that at that point, perhaps the kids really were just being selfish, mean little bastards.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

I don't have a problem with them excluding Constance either because they don't like gays or because they blame her for not having a real prom.

Did a man wearing a hat labelled 'Common sense' hit you with a spade recently, leading you to embark upon a savage quest of vengeance to completely undermine any vestiges of the remotely sensible? Everything you have posted in the last couple of days has me inching closer and closer to a fucking aneurysm.

[Ben Lahnger]

JCC, I was thinking the same thing. And it surprised me, because I had previously come to respect Ophelia's opinions, even when I disagreed. But the last few days ...

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

I don't have a problem with them excluding Constance either because they don't like blacks or because they blame her for not having a real prom.

Ophelia, how does it sound if we change the word "gays" to "blacks"? And why would you be concerned about discrimination against the mentally handicapped but not about discrimination against gays? What kind of world-view do you have to have to make those two different things?

Or have you joined with the hateful children of this Mississippi high school in blaming Constance for the turn of events?

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by JCC

Did a man wearing a hat labelled 'Common sense' hit you with a spade recently, leading you to embark upon a savage quest of vengeance to completely undermine any vestiges of the remotely sensible? Everything you have posted in the last couple of days has me inching closer and closer to a fucking aneurysm.

I don't have a problem with you not understanding the things I say.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

I don't have a problem with you not understanding the things I say.

Explain, we're all ears.