LIES my parents told me!

[Krick Wurkheiser]

My mother tried to stop my sister shaving her head... as it turns out, she got more of an 80s New Wave/punk look (close crop with spikes in the front)

My sister's trick was to leave her very long hair unbrushed for so long that the centre parts acquired the texture of a woolen carpet and one was left with no feasible option but to cut it mostly off.

[Crying_Crimson_Tears]

Every time our hamster Floyd died, my dad would sneak out buy another one and put a very similar hamster to it in his cage, kept calling him Floyd. That hamster lived for a long time.

Then my mom blew dad's cover.

[Krick Wurkheiser]

Are you serious? How in the name of...

HOW did he get away with it?

[Asocalisten]

My father:
"If you don't finish dinner, zombies will eat you."

Bless his soul. He was an awesome man.

[Crying_Crimson_Tears]

Originally Posted by Krick Wurkheiser

Are you serious? How in the name of...

HOW did he get away with it?

I was between 5-7 years old when he did this.

I was gullible.

[DRM]

My mother told me that little angry people lived on my teeth and it I didn't kill them two times a day with my toothbrush they would eat my teeth.

To this day I can't stand not brushing twise a day.

[Anarasha]

My mom used to tell me that people bullied me because they had some problems on their own and were just jealous.
Later I learned that it was more probable that it was because I was fat.

[LakitaJackson]

Originally Posted by Anarasha

My mom used to tell me that people bullied me because they had some problems on their own and were just jealous.
Later I learned that it was more probable that it was because I was fat.

Bawwwww!
I bet she also told you that you were big boned

[Sinjob]

The classic "don't make funny faces" myth. You guys know what I'm talkin bout...

Though it could be true, knowing I never tried it.

[Anarasha]

Originally Posted by LakitaJackson

Bawwwww!
I bet she also told you that you were big boned

Nah, a classmate of mine used to do that, until he started bullying me too :P

[Sinjob]

Why use the ":P" symbol when your referring to how miserable your life is? That's not funny, do something about it.

[Anarasha]

That's a long time ago. I look back on my past and roll my eyes, therefore being able to joke about it.

[Catch]

My mother lied to me about who my biological father is, but I still can't think of a way to confront her about it without sounding insane.

[homelitexl]

my dad told me canadians love butt sex
mom told me beer makes babies
dad said nascar was drama
this was when i was 12 and they thought i would fall for it god there pathetic

[Catch]

My sister told me nickels were more valuable than dimes because they were bigger. Family members are not good on currency exchanges.

[LakitaJackson]

Originally Posted by Catch

My mother lied to me about who my biological father is, but I still can't think of a way to confront her about it without sounding insane.

Try dat interbrative dancing, gurl!

[Catch]

Originally Posted by LakitaJackson

Try dat interbrative dancing, gurl!

I appreciate interpretive dancing quite a bit. It is graceful and modern; however, she might figure out somehow leading to a conversation. Good thinking though. ~thumbs up~

[Opteron_Man]

I think my mother used to call Santa Claus too.
"yes, he ate all his supper this week"

[Catch]

My mother used to lie to me so I'd look stupid.

[The Count]

My parents lied to me about where my Grandmother went - "She's on vacation."
My grandpa on the, other hand, was more straight forward - "She killed herself."

[Amarantha]

Originally Posted by Pineapple_Juice

I remember when my mother convinced me that any time I ate an entire meal, cleaning my plate, that somehow that same exact meal would be shipped out to the children in Africa. If I missed even one bite the starving kids wouldn't get any food from this meal.

Come to it, I can't remember if she told me that's how it worked or if she just said the whole "starving kids in Africa would love that meal" thing and my imagination took over.

Why you should never tell this lie to children:

(601): You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa (from Texts From Last Night)

[Anarasha]

They told me that God existed.