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02-25-2010, 10:21 AM
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#1
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Worst Premise For A Movie
I saw info on a particular movie that brought this to mind. If I had seen this thread created by someone else, I would have thought about talking about "Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2" or the venerable Ed Wood's "Glen or Glenda" or any number of other bad films. But a horror movie wouldn't have popped into my head. I like "Frankenhooker" and "Basket Case" and "Demonic Toys" and tons of other cheap, campy, shlocky horror films. But when I saw the promotional information for this film, I just had to start this thread!
From the site I saw the film promoted on:
The Human Centipede: First Sequence
"Not since Cronenberg was in his heyday has someone manipulated the human form for horrific effect to the extent that [director Tom] Six does here, not since Miike has someone created such a compelling, just-off-center view of humanity." - Todd Brown, twitch.com
Hey, wanna see a movie where people are sewn together ass to mouth? Of course you do! Well, your prayers have been answered, because here comes The Human Centipede, the most sickening, notorious piece of cinematic body horror from the 2009 festival circuit. Tom Six, one of Holland's most controversial auteurs, gives us a simple tale of a mad doctor who who is trying to create a single being out of three by attaching them at their digestive systems. Why? Who cares -- it's gross! This shit makes Hostel seem like On Golden Pond! Be the first at your workplace to bring up The Human Centipede at the water cooler. Screw Avatar, this is the real "game changer" in cinema for 2010!
Dir. Tom Six, 2009, 90 min.
You can see the trailer (if you want to) HERE
So, just knowing that this exists is enough to make me want to cringe in the corner and scream "Why! Why! WHY!"
Do you have a better candidate for worst premise for a movie?
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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02-25-2010, 12:09 PM
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#2
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sheffield UK.
Posts: 2,065
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This is pretty fucking bad. I've seen better student film trailers...
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Avoid all needle drugs - The only dope worth shooting is Richard Nixon.
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03-12-2010, 02:12 AM
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#3
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Iowa
Posts: 18
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Hahahaha, it look so shitty.
Not to mention it's directed by a guy name Tom Six, so that says a lot!
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05-07-2010, 12:01 PM
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#4
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Just thought I'd update this since "The Human Centipede" is actually making the rounds at theaters now. And just so you have a chance to give it a second thought before throwing your money away to see this 'film', here is the last paragraph from Roger Ebert's review:
"I am required to award stars to movies I review. This time, I refuse to do it. The star rating system is unsuited to this film. Is the movie good? Is it bad? Does it matter? It is what it is and occupies a world where the stars don't shine."
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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05-07-2010, 12:09 PM
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#5
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 9,548
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I will always resent you for making me see that poster, Ben. ALWAYS.
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05-07-2010, 12:09 PM
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#6
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 49
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Was that an ass to mouth scene ? Gasps*
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05-07-2010, 01:00 PM
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#7
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saya
I will always resent you for making me see that poster, Ben. ALWAYS.
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I understand. But at least, if an associate should suggest the idea of seeing this thing, you'll be forewarned.
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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05-07-2010, 05:02 PM
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#8
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Harlem
Posts: 6,909
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This is epic.
__________________
No Gods. No Kings.
Not all beliefs and ideas are equal.
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05-08-2010, 10:32 PM
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#9
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 9,548
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Cinema Snob put up a review, made a comparison to two girls one cup, and he enjoyed it but he took it as a black comedy. From what he and a lot of other people are saying online, its actually not very graphic for what it promises, its more the concept of itself thats disturbing than anything they show (you don't see the connection, there's bandages around the ass-mouth graft).
Still never watching it, and questioning a few friendships with people who want to go see it.
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05-27-2010, 08:18 PM
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#10
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 9,548
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05-27-2010, 08:40 PM
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#11
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: Perched on a near-by building
Posts: 93
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I can't believe this...
isn't a Uwe Boll movie.
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05-28-2010, 05:48 PM
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#12
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: United States of America
Posts: 117
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Ha. Already heard about this on the IMDb horror boards a long time ago. People were going nuts over Paranormal Activity. It didn't live up to the hype in my eyes but if this is anything like Gutterballs or Brain Damage, then I'm sure I'll fucking love it.
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