life sucks

morbidrose · 04-05-2005, 09:53 PM

my dad's a fucking jackass and should fucking rot in hell for puttin me through needless shit adn fuck i can't think straight i'm so fuckin pissed..so yeah i gave in $300 wHen i got my SS check he was supposed to use it for bills cause i need light and water the fucker did goddess knows what with it adn now we don't have lights adn this is like the 6th time in a year that this has happened and i'm fucking tired of it.we don't have a home phone either cause the fucker didn't pay the bill adn he won't pay up on it cause hes a dumbass.i've given up being able to trust people cause they just wind up lying to me in the end...yeah this is the guy that told me my mother died because of me which i know is total bullshit cause she died in a car wreck when i was at school but still that shit hurts cause he told me this when i was 12 i don't trust him or any guys for that matter adn then people wonder why i'm gay adn i'm like you don't wanna know because it's a long long story adn yeah it just pissed me off that yeah fuck i can't think....i'm so tempted to just like o don't know i'm known for cutting and suicidal tendencies but yeah fuck that cause i want to so bad and i can't cause of a promise i made adn i really really think my trust and any home i had of finding a decent guy has just been like shattered cause yeah i just can't anymore that will make my gf happy but yeah....the only place i've ever been able to find any kind of love or accetance after my mom died was from women and my brother and he's constantly trying to change me so i'm like fuck that and yeah....i'm really pissed adn just typing anything that pisses me off that comes in my head at the moment cuase if i don't get this out i'm gonna like do something more stupid than the cutting i've already done....trust is a major thing for me and if i can't trust my dad who the fuck can i trust i was like shit i dont have anybody but my friends and they all live a way's from me but yeah busted and called tonight so i wouldnt try and kill myself but now i;'ll be skipping school tomorrow cause i can't go home adn yeah my dad also didn't pay the morgage so they're gonna foreclose on our house or they're trying to and yeah i'm like well fuck that's the only sanctuary taht i have besides music adn yeah it's gotten so bad that i don't stay at home on the weekends anymore adn yeah fuck it just fuck it...i'll be 18 in july and i'm moving out but i'm thinking i should do it sooner adn move to where i know i can trust the people i'm living with....i also might wind up droppin out of school because of this though....but i only have a month roughly till graduaation so i might hang around till right after that to move...or dissapear....
ty for all that actually try adn make since of this and i know it makes none so yeah....

edible_eye · 04-05-2005, 10:06 PM

finish school.

move out.

don't look back.

oh... and fuck and yeah.

AlKilyu · 04-05-2005, 10:49 PM

http://tinypic.com/2loy6o

edible_eye · 04-05-2005, 11:21 PM

http://www.snowcrest.net/cafemocha/i...dancingdog.gif

creepylittleshit · 04-05-2005, 11:30 PM

I have been through the system enough to know that you can get out this.

First: call a suicide prevention hotline and tell them you are gonna off yourself. Tell them that you are not safe to be alone. let them know you mean business

Second: once you are in the crazy bin let them know that your home is not a safe place for you to be. At your age they are more than likly going to put you in an independant living home. A place like this will allow you to continue your education and get on your feet.

Third: look for a job and move out.

At least this way you will have a safe place to live and a better chance at getting done what you need to do.

My Mom was an asshole so i had to get out of her home too. Independant living by the way gives you alot of freedom. Most of the time you just gotta be home by curfew and reframe from hitting people and they will let you stay.

AlKilyu · 04-05-2005, 11:33 PM

http://tinypic.com/2lp388

edible_eye · 04-06-2005, 12:04 AM

http://harroldelem.k12.sd.us/element...%20dancing.gif

morbidrose · 04-06-2005, 08:30 AM

sorry i said fuck and yeah alot adn for not using punctuation...i don't normally cuss so much and say yeah at all. adn for the record, i'm normally pretty good at punctuating things...i just couldn't think last night i was so upset which is hard for anyone to do...i was just at breaking point.....i was planning on moving out this summer btw..i just don't think i can wait that long...

Panther · 04-06-2005, 09:24 AM

I know how that feels.

Tough ti out if you can, but creepylittleshit's plan seems like a good one if you really feel there is no way you can contiue at you parent's house.

Good luck, either way.

Solumina · 04-06-2005, 02:04 PM

If it's only a month then you may want to see if you can stay with a friend but if you are going to stay home then my advice to you wold be to stop giving the checks to your dad. You may want to find out if there is anyway that you can pay the bills yourself and if there is then go ahead and do that. I wish I could be of more help

edible_eye · 04-10-2005, 07:12 PM

http://sweetmeliss420.com/smileys/kinky/dancing.gif http://www.clowns-usa.com/images/baby_dancing.gif

AlKilyu · 04-10-2005, 08:35 PM

http://tinypic.com/2nsui0

edible_eye · 04-10-2005, 08:42 PM

http://lwn.net/Gallery/i/dance.gif

AlKilyu · 04-10-2005, 09:15 PM

http://tinypic.com/2nt2lv

Soul_Immortal · 04-10-2005, 09:22 PM

Kid, lighten up...slightly insensitive for me to say, but yes, lighten up.

You can either follow the path you are already on, or you can change it. Job Corps seems to be popular. I wish you the best.

*Soul*

edible_eye · 04-10-2005, 10:42 PM

http://xero.dzygn.com/temp/breakdance.gif

edible_eye · 04-10-2005, 10:59 PM

http://bart.gamingw.net/junk/dance/86648148.gif

AlKilyu · 04-10-2005, 11:04 PM

http://img128.echo.cx/img128/2995/ji...ceskirt5rd.gif

edible_eye · 04-10-2005, 11:07 PM

http://bart.gamingw.net/junk/dance/61278688.gif

AlKilyu · 04-10-2005, 11:21 PM

http://img47.exs.cx/img47/7122/willa.gif

AlKilyu · 04-10-2005, 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by edible_eye

http://bart.gamingw.net/junk/dance/61278688.gif

http://img38.exs.cx/img38/5642/clowns25mb.gif

Empty_Purple_Stars · 04-11-2005, 12:08 AM

http://jscfan.com/images/animated/abbeydance.gif

SuicideJade · 04-11-2005, 02:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Soul_Immortal

Job Corps seems to be popular. I wish you the best.

*Soul*

NOOOOOOO!
Job corps is EVIL * i know, i've been to two :shock: *
The food makes you sick..*job corps kids constantly have stomach cramps and the runs*
they barely give you enough allowance to buy your necessities * you have to buy your own toiletries, laundry soap and street clothes.*
the dorms are often falling apart and badly heated or air coditioned
the teachers don't give a flying shit..
they never have the money for all the activities thy promise you..
the dorm is NEVER clean enough... they will write you up for one hair on the sink..
people steal
they have sex everywhere *ahem* :shock:
there are gangs
heavy violence
you name it, they got it..
lets not forget the rats and roaches....
>_<

if you go .. it's the friends you make that you ache for long long after you leave...
i wish i'd kept up with mine :cry:

in short...
i hate job corps..
it's an option reserved for desperation :x

Soul_Immortal · 04-11-2005, 07:30 AM

Ouchy Jade, I had no idea:-(....

*Soul*

edible_eye · 04-11-2005, 12:17 PM

http://www.varialconsulting.com/aaron/fatty_dance.gif