Helping suggestions for those who get heckled

[CountVonCount]

As for weight try the smaller meals with snacks in between. It's said to be better to snack continually all day than schedule actual meals, but that's not that easy. If you can try to eat as little as possible for a couple days, your stomach will shrink and you'll feel full faster. Changing eating habits isn't a miracle worker, they take time to adjust to, and loosing weight is the same. You won't notice you've lost weight until you've been on a new routine for awhile. Especially if you're looking at the belly and love handles(for men at least) they are the hardest spots to get rid of extra flab and usually won't go away until a couple months of changed eating habits and cardio exercise. If there's one thing I loath it's love handles.

[Catch]

I have two or three big meals and try to avoid snacking. If a snack is needed rare fruits and vegetables have very few calories. I've always been on the small side so no reason to change.

As for people picking on each other that is all a part of the politics. People tend to want to put down other groups they don't understand. In fact, if they just ignore you then you are not hot. Becoming more attractive opens doors. If too attractive they become the poster child of the group and some people just don't like Goths.

[Mauritia Mayer]

Originally Posted by Sanguine Mind

Fixed.

lets face it, almost everyone in America is at least 15lbs overweight

...and Canada is catching up. After being dragged to a 'normal' club one night I have realized that the goth scene is not at any more risk of being overtaken by fat people than the rest of the country. Granted, I didn't see fat girls in underwear, but I did see them in hotpants...ugggh.

[Solumina]

Where do you all get your numbers? About a 1/3 of Americans are more than 15lbs, that isn't half, a far cry from almost everyone. It must suck to be where ever you are, maybe 5% of the people who visit the clubs I frequent are more than a few pounds overweight and the vast majority are actually fairly attractive, I suppose I should count myself lucky.

[Catch]

I believe everyone can be happy with their appearance.

[Solumina]

You can believe that all you want, other people have to look at them too and I'm sorry if it sounds mean or cruel but some people should be ashamed of the way that they look.

[Tam Li Hua]

I tend to agree with Solumina, though I would use "realistic" rather than "ashamed". When I see a ridiculously overweight person [say, 300+ lbs, and -not- from muscle], I tend to think that person can't really be enjoying life. Then again, I look at an adult who is 98 lbs. and think the same thing.

I'm not saying we all have to look like super-models, and self-confidence -is- a good thing, but one needs to be realistic and healthy too.

[Beneath the Shadows]

I haven't bothered to read the whole thread, so it's probably been said before, but...

IGNORE.

If someone heckles you, so what? As long as you're happy wearing whatever you're wearing, it doesn't matter.

[Catch]

I enjoy smoking, which is unhealthy, and it makes me very happy. I'm going to go smoke now.

[Tam Li Hua]

Uhm...thanks for sharing...?

[Beneath the Shadows]

Did she just say that she wears smoke?

[Catch]

Ya. I wear smoke. It is easy getting a seat on the bus.

[XxBloodyrosexX]

Originally Posted by Stabby

lol fuck yea monty python



On a side note. How many people here would wear a cloak in the winter? I personally love my cloak and it would be much warmer... But I tend to be self-conscious and don't like people looking at me. If there are people who do that do the number of looks go down after awhile? (or do you just get used to it?)

I always wear a cape during the winter. It's cadet grey ( blue grey) and was given to me by my father. Yes, my totally geek father. It was part of his college uniform at VMI ( Virginia military institute) he would wear it himself if he could fit. I also wear his matchng greatcoat. It's wonderful wooly warm.

And on the weight thing technically I'm overweight but anyone who looks at me doesn't think I am. I'm just a little curvy. ( as in hourglass not rolls) most f the weight is on my cheast. It's a family thing.

[Angelic Dissonance]

Everyone either rips on the overweight or attempts to delude them. When it comes down to that, just freaking don't show it off unless you WANT people to think you're fat, know what you look good in. As for 'heckling' by conformist-types, yes, inverted pentagrams ARE satan-worshipping symbols. Acknowledge that. If you really look like a freak, damn well expect to be treated as a freak. And if you don't like it, tell them to Fuck Off--or dress in a semi-acceptable way, it's your choice. I don't get heckled. People who have a problem with me don't have the guts to say anything about it, and anyway, I never wear anything TOO over-the-top.... My vice-principle seems to think I look good in a fishnet shirt, even with red eyeliner(which I don't usually wear, only whenever the Hell I feel like it). My girl(YES I'M MALE) is technically overweight, but she never draws attention to that fact. By the way, baggy clothing makes you look even fatter. Matte black, WELL-FITTED, can do wonders. Really though... no matter HOW much eyeliner I decide to wear, or if I want black lips for today, no one says anything. Not in a mean way--I get an occasional 'Why do you do that?'--but rarely, and never in contempt.

[Anima_Severem]

I get a lot of crap sometimes.

But I'm not delusional about my weight. I go great lengths to avoid showing it off.

My sole pieces of truly "gothic" clothing are a black velvet pullover and a matching skirt.

I need to find something that won't roast me alive in minutes.

[Angelic Dissonance]

Try a matte black ankle length coat, maybe leather. Real leather, not the shiny stuff. Or a nice pinstripe Three-peice.

[Jonathan]

I'm giving a sports jacket, black tee, jeans, and dressy shoes a go for tomorrow. Inspired, ne? Lately I've been on a simplicity kick. I've never really gotten into strappy buckley atrocities, personally, but your tastes may vary.

Physique wise, I'm around 5'9" and bouncing between 165-170 lbs depending on the day. I'm sure there's room for improvement, but I've got other priorities.

I'll see if I can get some photos, I'm currently living on my own, and am cursed to take great pictures of everything except myself.

[SiouxsiePernova]

My advice is: if you don't want to be mocked, then don't traipse around in a black bin liner or look like a 'walking velvet curtain of doom'. (To borrow Emi's quote.)

[Angelic Dissonance]

Actually, who does get heckled? Do you? If you do, is it because you try to look as much like a villain from Naruto or as demonic as possible? Or because you openly flaunt your amazing Bi-Sexuality in front of everyone you can? Or is it because you truly are as ridiculous as everyone says? If not, then what DO you get heckled for, specifically? Anyone?

[Malice In Wonderland]

No.1 rule for not getting heckled would be don't look like a complete fool.

[300pockets]

I used to be heckled for being a Goth in middle school. Ironically, all the Aberzombies that wore those clothes (not preppies, you have to be from an old-money family to be a preppy, go to prep school, go to cotillion/debutante, etc., not just be nouveau-riche) became scene kids once they found out about the local HT. (The town was really a suburb of another town)

Anyways.

What I did was when I went to my new school, I started out looking rather bland. Jeans, shirt, shoes. Eventually, I evolved, like a Tamagothi.

The stages:

Jeans, shirt, shoes
Jeans, shirt, Converse
Jeans, shirt, black Converse
Jeans, graphic tee, black Converse
Jeans, band tee, black Converse,
Jeans, band tee, black Converse, studded belt
Jeans, band tee, black Converse, belt and accessories

Also, for my more visually Goth days, I went from:

tennis skirt, polo, sandals
longer skirt, polo, sandals
darker skirt, darker top, boots

And slowly added more and more black items.

My peers didn't notice really.

It also helped because my family didn't see me turn immediately into Super Goth Girl 64. They always get on my case about liking darker things, so I wear all the clothes they buy me unconsensually (Hollister-type stuff) around the house and I leave the house early and get changed before they see me when I come home. Some stuff can't be hid (Emily the Strange dolls, Gloomybear journals, etc.) but my sister's an otaku, so they're more accepting of it as long as it's Goth-lite.

[DemiGoth]

I would say don't wear too much tripp, this gets you heckled by just about anyone who knows what a mall goth is, don't wear the make up (eyeliner/white face makeup/lip stick) around immature people who just say "ooh look he has makeup on he's gay lets go bully him!", and don't copy people for ideas, if you copy someone thats a garuntee for heckling, if your look was inspired its a different story though, but honesty make up your own goth looks, and wear the correct pentacle/pentagram if you're planning on wearing one.

Upsidedown pentacle: Satanist
Runic pentacle: wiccan (i think)
Crucified pentacle: five wounds of christ

and there's one for pagans, but i'm not sure which one.

those are the major don'ts as far as i know, as for dos, they're pretty easy, wear something that suits you and just try to avoid people that bully others for no reason, and if they do, be the mature one and don't scream/curse to make points stay calm and use facts.

thats what i do.

[alyroi360]

My advice: If you are tall and you wear dark clothing, don't extend your height with platform boots. Wear all of the wierd shit that you like, so long as it matches. Try not to dress up as varying forms of Pirate or Alice in Wonderland characters... OR vampiric essances, OR a four year old with pigtails. Believe me, I have had all of those experiences... But those are if you DON'T want to stand out. If you do, than by all means, embarass yourself like me.

[Angelic Dissonance]

Originally Posted by DemiGoth

Upsidedown pentacle: Satanist
Runic pentacle: wiccan (i think)
Crucified pentacle: five wounds of christ

and there's one for pagans, but i'm not sure which one.

What's a 'crucified pentacle'?*just curious* And virtually any pentacle is Wiccan, especially the knotwork-type inter-laced ones. That being said, a symbol extracts its meaning from its user, so.... anyway, Wicca and paganism are generally considered the same thing, except 'pagan' refers basically to any pre-Christian religeon. Usually, you won't get ripped on for wearing one, but people might whisper that you have '....one of those Devil-Stars'. Usually, their true meaning is the five directional elements, being Fire, Earth, Wind, Water, and Spirit.

[crucifix]

Originally Posted by DemiGoth

for dos, they're pretty easy, wear something that suits you and just try to avoid people that bully others for no reason, and if they do, be the mature one and don't scream/curse to make points stay calm and use facts.

thats what i do.

Exactly. I usually wear a t shirt and black pants and army boots in the summer months, suits me and is comfortable. In the winter I usually wear black skinny pants, black shoes, a balck button down and black vest. Still, it is simple and suits me and expresses me personality (people tell me I remind them of a male wednesday addams, cheesy, but it makes me smile, lol). I save the fishnets and vinyl for the clubs and events I like to go to. I mean, really, tripp pants, spiked collar, huge boots all at once just screams "look at me" and usually the looking is not in a kind way.