the Corrupted Wishes game

[spookypurple]

Originally Posted by six_inch_heels

I wish the neighbours dog would stop barking. It's giving me a headache.

Granted. It begins singing Mozart arias instead. But it still sounds like barking to human ears, and you end up calling in the vet.

I wish I had voice recognition on my computer so I could dictate my scripts to it.

[Solumina]

granted but it only understands Latin

I wish that I wasn't so damn tired

[Godslayer Jillian]

Granted, but because to create something, something of equal or greater value must be lost.
You stop being so damn tired, but you also stop being so damn hot.

I wish I could knw the lives of Romeo and Julliet if they hadn't died.

[WizardElement5]

^^Granted. You sleep for one hundred years and when you wake up everyone you knew has already died of old age.

^Granted. But they live very mundane, useless lives.

I wish I didn't have so many responsibilities.

[Solumina]

Granted you now have no responsibilities because Fluffy the evil kitty has been given complete control of our life. Fluffy decides that you are more amusing when you are half starved so you live out the rest of your days miserable and begging Fluffy for more food.

I wish that my car would clean itslf

[Cicero]

Granted. But the self-cleaning vehicle becomes such a neat freak it won't even allow you to touch it. In its rage at you leaving fingerprints on its sparkling doorhandle, it runs you over.

I wish I weren't sick right now. My throat is killing me

[Dreaming Vendetta]

Granted. You are not sick, but your throat is still killing you. Somehow an enraged ferret became trapped in there and is slowly chewing its way out of your esophagus.

I wish The Corrupted Wishes Game thread wasn't distracting me from that essay I need to write.

[maggot]

Granted. This game isn't distracting you, but instead a clown came bursting through your window and stabbed you in the kidney, and that's distracting you.

I wish I would finally get around to modding my computer case.

[Kinflame]

Granted, but you become corrupt and bitchy from too much modding, thus causing everyone close to you to avoid you, and you start cutting youself.

Your cuts become infected, and you have to have your arms amputated. Without arms, you cannot perform neccessary human functions, and one night the neighborhood hooligans come to your house and rob you, and proceed to pelt you with feces. You choke on human excrement wondering why the hell you couldn't just have waited.

I wish I could fly. Original indeed.

[wunky]

granted. you grow magnificent wings. on your maiden flight, however, you clip one of your wings, rips it off and you plunge to yoru death.

i wish i had a packet of haribo

[Crom Crauch]

granted, but the haribo are all made out of pure rat-poison, and they smell like real haribo

I wish I had a bonsai kitten

[wishcat]

Granted.

But this bonsai kitten breaks free and releases all it's anger out on you by ripping you to shreds, It deforms your face and you become so deppressed that you become clinically insane.



I wish I had something good to eat right now.

[Magpie_Tendencies]

Granted.

You have a massive bowl of spinnach (sp?) - very good for you.

I wish my hands weren't so cold.

[mutsumiasakura]

Granted. You discover that you may keep them eternally warm by bathing them in the blood of virgin sacrifices, but after you've finally achieved warmth, you are arrested for making virgin sacrifices and exiled to an icebox in Antarctica. Bon voyage!

I wish that I were the Goddess of kittens, sunshine, and going barefoot.

[WizardElement5]

But you are already. Oh, I mean granted. But the sun shines so much that the ground becomes magma... ouch, your feet!

I wish I could type faster.

[Magpie_Tendencies]

Granted.

You type so fast that your computer can't keep up and crashes. You are computerless for several weeks and by the time it's fixed, you've forgotten how to speed type.

I wish I could speak fluent Japanese for a day (so I can pass my exam).

[mutsumiasakura]

(Me too, me too. I fear the coming of my Kanji quiz, and my final . . . )

Granted. You speak perfect Japanese for a day, and it's even the same day as your exam! Unfortunately, you completely forget how to read and write it, can't even understand the exam, and flunk miserably. Hopefully I'll have have better luck, huh.

I wish that I could eat a lot of chocolate and not get fat. (Not that I'm overweight, I just don't want to be.)

[Magpie_Tendencies]

Granted.

Unfortunatly, the wish only covers blocks of chocolate and not chocolate cake, chocolate icing, chocolate milk. You are unaware of this and grow steadily fatter on a healthy diet of chocolate cake washed down with chocolate milk.

I wish it wasn't so hard to get an American Visa.

[Corpsey]

The american government decideds that it will pass a law that will unify all of Britan's old colonies, that have gained independance, together. This will be similar to the EURO. Australia is one of those countries. But, once you've gotten your visa, you come over to America, only to find that while you were mid-flight, this policy changed because too many Australians were trying to smuggle Marajuana in their surf boards, so Australia has been left out of this visa scheme and all recent visas Australians have to get into America are rebuked. You end up having to go back home, without being refunded for your visa or flight costs.

I wish i didnt have to come to a library to use the internet.

[Magpie_Tendencies]

That was a clever grant. Nice touch with the Schapelle Corby reference.

Granted.

You have the internet at home but your phone bills sky-rocket and you are left broke.

I wish I was funnier.

[Solumina]

granted you can now go down the road and use Fluffy the evil kitty's internet for the small price of your soul.

I wish that I could control the temperature in my office

[Mandi_666]

i wish i could fly.

[Solumina]

*damn cloudy weather making my internet slow*
Magpie:Granted you are now so funny that no one ever leaves you alone and you go crazy, eventually killing yourself along with hundreds of others

Mandi: Granted but you fly into a building and kill yourself

I wish that I could control the temperature in my office

[Magpie_Tendencies]

*edit*
Now you've confused my post Solumina *pouts*.

Mandi, you have to grant someone else's wish and corrupt it in some way before making your own wish. Also, you should go introduce yourself in the introductions section (in your own thread).

Solumina - Granted.

You can control the temperature in your office. Unfortunately, as you make your office hotter, the rest of the building gets colder and vice-versa. You hate the temperature change when you leave your offie, so you never leave again.

I wish it was Friday.

[WizardElement5]

Granted. But now everyone bursts out laughing at everything you say, even when you're trying to make a very serious point.

I wish the bunnies didn't eat all the little azaleas I plant.

*edit* That's funny, funny just becme Friday... I think. I'm still bamboooooozled