Less of a Goth?

OnixxFilth · 01-17-2005, 09:41 AM

I've been doing some thinking, and I've been wondering- does it somehow make me a less worthy or a "poseur" goth if I don't dress like it all the time? I think I am- as I always say,"You can take the girl out of the goth, but you can't take the goth out of the girl." Sometimes I have to dress "normal" for my job and stuff, and I know I shouldn't care what others think, but I do. I'm worried that should I ever get to a big city and go to a club or something that I'll be seen as some kind of a poseur by other goths b/c I don't have any expensive, nice goth clothes and I cobble together my outfits from "found" stuff at thrift stores and such. Ok, I'm done whining! Replies appreciated!

winged_dreams · 01-17-2005, 10:57 AM

I'm probably not the best one to reply to this because I don't really dress gothic at all. My thoughts are who cares about how gothic you look? If people don't like you because you don't look gothic enough then smack them!! Clothes shouldn't matter (unless your clothes are really dirty and smelly) all that much. As long as you can hold a good conversation then it's all good. That's just my opinion.

MrMaelstrom · 01-17-2005, 11:20 AM

Well put, winged.

Case closed.

The court is now adjourned.

FenrisQueen · 01-17-2005, 11:24 AM

I don't have a read made answer for you, but my ideas are in this post.

No one can exactly pinpoint "goth" I know a forty year old mother who is one of the truest "goths" I have ever met. People can't decide something about someone else based on appearance. For example, the group that i hang out with at my high school is the biggest mix of ecletics I have ever seen, and they consider themselves goth. I dress in t-shirts and jeans, or bondage pants. I wear makeup when i can remember to put it on. If you believe your goth, then you are. Don't listen to critiscm from people who know nothing about why you dress, act, and think the way you do.

reborndead · 01-17-2005, 11:50 AM

yeah, i agree with winged, it doesnt matter what you dress like as long as you know who you are and dont cover yourself up with some image because you think that its who you should be. there are no 'three steps to insta-goth' yourself and anyone who tries to isnt really who they look like. lots of goths throw together what they have and lots have expensive clothes that they pick out. and some wear jeans and a t-shirt and dont do anything special. and if thats what works for them then no one is going to think any less of them, unless theyre idiots themselves and cant find anything better to do.

wow, rant mode :shock: , anyway, thats what i think.

OnixxFilth · 01-18-2005, 09:07 AM

Wow, thanks everyone for ur answers! I know that I have some serious self-esteem issues, but I'm working on them. Besides, I should just appreciate the fact that I'm the only visible goth at my private Catholic university! I'm told there are others, but they just must not dress like it. I've got to stop worrying what others think, and realize it's ok to dress like a "girly girl" (i.e., wearing pastels or other "un-goth" colors) and that I'm still just as much of a goth as if I was wearing black or other dark colors like I usually do.

winged_dreams · 01-18-2005, 10:17 AM

There's nothing wrong with pastels. I like them for they are so pretty and look soft. But I love all colors because they can all be found in nature although I am partial to greens.

And I'm happy because people agreed with me!! Yay!!

Kage · 01-18-2005, 02:23 PM

Hi. I know this will probably irritate alot of people but please help me :? . I have read multiple websites answering "what is goth" and I think I understand pretty well what goth is. It doesn't seem that bad or wierd to me. What I have found about goth basically is that goths like dark, sorrowful stuff and like to be different and realize how ridiculous it is when people make fun of everyone for clothes and things like that. Also that goths accept gay people. From that I dont understand why everyone thinks that goths are freaks. This one kid sat across from me on the bus. One kid asked if I was goth and I said I don't know and the kid sitting across from me moved away and said he tries to not assosciate with goths. Is there something I have missed about goth that makes people react like that? Please don't tell me to go to websites and read FAQs or that I'm stupid or something. I need to talk to other goths.

FenrisQueen · 01-18-2005, 02:55 PM

Alright, I'm not going to flame you, Because I am not in the mood and at least you know how to spell. Goths are generally more accepting of people, than say, the "popular" people who only care about their image. I am bisexual, and no one here has insulted me for it. For me, I think a part of why I dress the way I do is to carefully choose my friends. People who want to be my friend based on what I look like are not real friends. If you make an attempt to act different from the crowd, chances are, someone isn't going to like it, or they will ridicule you for it. There are a number of faqs on the web that allude to what "goth" is. None of them have been able to pinpoint it exactly.

After the incident with Columbine, many people have blamed it on the goth culture as a whole. Goths are often seen as devil worshippers (as ludricous a theory if there ever was one) and bad influences. Many stereotypes exist, and they probably won't ever completely go away. You have to learn to deal with it.

And, yes, this thread will probably upset a lot of people. There are many deleted threads started by newbs, and they are usually flamed into submisson until a mod deems it necessary to lock or delete the thread. Just so you know, develop a thick skin.

Kage · 01-18-2005, 03:16 PM

Thanks for not flaming me.

I have read about the Columbine incident and I realize how ridiculous it is that they blame that on goth. I don't really let any criticism affect me because it's just ridiculous. I accept bisexuality fine because I'm gay. Again, thanks for responding to me and not flaming me.

Oh, and I'm guessing this was moved by a mod so thankyou for correcting my post and I apologize for posting it in the wrong board.

Solumina · 01-18-2005, 03:17 PM

Being goth isn’t about how you look it’s more a mindset. Someone can wear all black and tons of eyeliner and dye their hair black but that doesn’t make them gothic. The opposite is just as true, you can wear lots of soft pastel clothing and still truly be a goth.

FenrisQueen · 01-18-2005, 03:33 PM

Youre welcome Kage, anytime.

reborndead · 01-18-2005, 03:53 PM

okay, to kage- i think that the whole goth=equal thing is something that is just there by those people who are just oblivous to everything on the other side of the line. And from past experience i've found that the people that are critical about what you wear or the fact that you arent with the crowd or anything that separates you from the rest arent really people that are worth getting to know anyway. sometimes they just go along with everything else but i wouldnt want to be their friend either. Actually, i had a whole rant written and posted it earlier but then during the time i was writing the thing got merged and it wasnt available anymore. dammit. and i was in a good mindset, too. oh well. hope that i actually said something useful and didnt offend anyone... :roll:

Kage · 01-18-2005, 05:15 PM

I agree with you Reborndead. I don't want people hanging out with me for things like clothes. My friends at school right now are basically people I sit with at lunch. We share some interests in gaming and music but none of us are really friends. They make constant racist jokes and make fun of sexual opinions. I don't know why I even stay with them. ^^;

OnixxFilth · 01-19-2005, 07:41 AM

Ahh, perhaps that's one of the reasons I didn't think of as to why I dress the way I do- nice theory! I too like to be choosy about my friends- I've learned to be after facing much derision for my Asperger's Syndrome (a mild form of autism). I was made fun of so much when I was younger that I learned to be very careful about who I reveal things to and who I allow close to me.

WolfMoon · 01-19-2005, 08:40 AM

See, you people are missing the point entirely!!!

You're totally not goth if you don't own every stitch of lip-service clothing and New Rocks are a must!

You must have black hair and own at least 2 bauhaus and Cure records on vinyl!!!

And don't even think about going outside without white face w/ eyeliner scribbled everywhere!

Have a nice day poseurs!!!

:lol:

OnixxFilth · 01-19-2005, 09:25 AM

Umm, I do hope ur kidding, WolfMoon! While Lip Service is my favorite clothing line, it's damn expensive for someone who only works part time and makes like $6.18 an hour! I find mine on Ebay used, lol! :lol:

WolfMoon · 01-19-2005, 09:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OnixxFilth

Umm, I do hope ur kidding, WolfMoon! While Lip Service is my favorite clothing line, it's damn expensive for someone who only works part time and makes like $6.18 an hour! I find mine on Ebay used, lol! :lol:

Puhleeze, luv!

Haven't you read any of my posts?And yeah, unless you just can't find/make something lip-service is a good place to turn.I was such an ebay junkie for awhile!I have gotten some very cool things from there.But thrift shopping will, sometimes, yeild you better results for less money and less worrying/waiting, which I hate!

Some bastard beat me outta winning a great pair of New Rocks by a fucking dollar!!1 dollar!!!!!

I still don't have a pair....

*sniffle*

OnixxFilth · 01-19-2005, 09:41 AM

Oooh, I hate it when I'm only beat out of something by a small amount! Today I was beat out of an Apoptygma Berzerk cd by fifty cents! I was sooo mad!

winged_dreams · 01-19-2005, 12:29 PM

Speaking of ebay, I'm trying to buy books for school and also looking at pretty fabrics. Speaking of Lip Service I really like that geisha skirt that they have but I won't pay 50 bucks for a skirt. I'm going to try making something like it eventually. Hmmm...maybe I should look on Ebay for a sewing machine.

hellschild · 01-19-2005, 01:06 PM

I find it so amusing to read your conversations.. Over time I have grown found of you all.. I do not post often because I really have nothing to type which you would find worthy of recognition. Keep in mind that I do exist and I am reading....(okay I will shut up now)

AlKilyu · 01-19-2005, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xnguela

I'm whatever I am...

...which is pretty freakin awesome.

secretboy · 01-19-2005, 07:01 PM

You can find out of you are less of a goth or more of a goth by ordering Secretboy's Goth Ruler which doubles as a marital aid for more adventurous couples. (married couples only! this should not be practiced by the young bachelor or spinster!!)

Just send a check or money order to

Secretboy's Goth Ruler
P.O. Box 31337
Plano, TX 74345

And if you send it in you'll get a free history of the Visigoths and the Ostragoths -- while supplies last! *

*note: please do not use the history of the Visigoths and the Ostragoths as a marital aid. Secretboy, Inc. is not accountable for bruising and rashes that might result from such an unorthodox practice. Secretboy, inc. is not responsible for failed term papers resulting in consulting the history, it is of entertainment purposes only and should not be used as a reference material.

OnixxFilth · 01-20-2005, 09:08 AM

Oh course not everyone's goth! Like I've repeated throughout multiple threads, it's a particular life philosophy and/or way of looking at things, lol! Silly Xnguela! :lol:

WolfMoon · 01-20-2005, 11:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hellschild

I find it so amusing to read your conversations.. Over time I have grown found of you all.. I do not post often because I really have nothing to type which you would find worthy of recognition. Keep in mind that I do exist and I am reading....(okay I will shut up now)

Ah, looks like we have ourselves a stalker.

*pumps 12 ga.*