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Old 04-14-2012, 06:31 PM   #7201
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Wait, is this a friends with benefits thing only or is a relationship on the table at all?

With just sex, if one of you feels like it should be more it could be messy. If its a relationship I'd say go for it, although at the same time YOU HAVENT BEEN SINGLE SINCE YOU WERE 19 ENJOY THIS BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED AND SPAWN AND LOOK BACK AND REALIZE YOU WASTED YOUR YOUTH.

I mean, feeling absolutely secure with being single I think is vital to going on to having good relationships. It hurts to see people jumping into things just because they don't like to be alone.
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Old 04-15-2012, 12:57 AM   #7202
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Apathy, ask yourself the big questions.... Do you want to get into another relationship and how serious a relationship do you want?

What does your gut tell you? If it's right, you'll feel it. She'll make you feel all kinds of special when you are feeling like shit....and more importantly your dog will love her to pieces :-D

My next question is - if it doesn't work, or you don't get together with her, are you going to regret it.

If I were in your shoes, I'd jump right in... but I'd probably do it a little slowly... nah to hell with it, I'd just jump in boots and all....

All the best dude. Whatever decision you make, it's the right one.
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Old 04-15-2012, 11:09 PM   #7203
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I fucking hate tanks.
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Old 04-16-2012, 11:09 AM   #7204
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Cuckoo - the fact that there's been an attraction between us for years makes me 100% certain it wouldn't JUST be a rebound deal, but you've pretty much hit the nail on the head with the whole not wanting to screw her around thing. Although I'm feeling a lot more ready to move on of late, I'd be lying if I said it weren't still pretty raw, which makes me wonder if it's fair to be getting involved with someone else yet. Which, I guess, means I've pretty much answered my own question.

Saya - it was offered as a "Hey, so we're FINALLY both single - let's fuck" deal. But we've lived together in the past as roommates (and were actually talking about doing so again just a couple of weeks ago, since we've both been wanting to move nearer work for a while), we know each other's families pretty well, and already see each other three or four times a week. On that basis, provided things didn't go horribly wrong within the first few weeks I could see us falling into a full-on relationship pretty quickly and naturally. Which, again, could be good or bad, depending which way you slice it.

While I don't really hate being single for the fact of being alone (frankly, getting the place to myself since the break-up has been waaayyy more of a problem than finding company, due to the half-touching & half-annoying collusion of my friends & my roommate in making sure I don't just turn waster again), I'd honestly have to say once you subtract the I-love-her-she-broke-my-soul-waaah element of it, the worst part is the lack of sex. I slept with a girl a few weeks ago but honestly, it was pretty shitty - aside from the fact that I have fetishes coming out my ears & and am easily bored by the whole vanilla thing, I have to like someone quite a lot to want to sleep with them. Which, aside from making me the emoest emo in town, actually really limits the sex opps. In a way I kind of wish I could just go out and fuck around like I see a few of my friends doing, but the truth is that the last time I actually enjoyed doing that was when I was enough of a dumbass kid that sex was still a novelty, and even a bad lay bumped up yr numbers. No longer being a teenage dickweed kind of killed that for me.

Fruitbat: Sax is useless in these situations, being a shameless whore who loves pretty much everyone he meets.

Anyway, I guess I'll give it some time - maybe until I can go a solid 2 weeks without welling up watching Disney movies with my nieces & nephews (fuck you, Evangeline from The Frog-Prince. Fuck you & yr shit). Thanks for the input, guys.
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Old 04-16-2012, 01:30 PM   #7205
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Anyway, I guess I'll give it some time - maybe until I can go a solid 2 weeks without welling up watching Disney movies with my nieces & nephews (fuck you, Evangeline from The Frog-Prince. Fuck you & yr shit). Thanks for the input, guys.
Awww AC you really are the emoest emo kid, that is so adorable. If it makes you feel any better Jacob gets a little misty eyed just hearing certain Disney songs.

It looks like you've kind of figured things out for yourself. If the thought of nit being too soon to start another relationship enters your mind then there is a pretty high chance that you need some more time to yourself. Be honest with this girl that you would be interested but that you need to get over your ex first.
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Old 04-16-2012, 01:49 PM   #7206
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You cried at The Princess and the Frog? Jesus rollerblading Christ, you really are in a bad way. I mean, Up, The Girl in the Fireplace, Wallace from The Wire - those I get. Those just mean you're not like secretly a Terminator or anything. But The Princess and the Frog? That just makes me want to give you hug and make you a sammich.

I think you're doing the right thing. If you guys weren't so close, it wouldn't really matter so much if anything went wrong; but since you're sure that you want her in your life whether as a friend or, potentially, a girlfriend, it's worth holding out until you know for a fact that you're not going to start weeping over your ex in the middle of a date or anything.
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Old 04-16-2012, 02:43 PM   #7207
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Thanks, Sol. Both for the advice AND the promise of cumfort if shit goes south. Although, really, promise is kind of a blasé way of viewing it. Really, I see that shit as more of a contract, y'know? As my niece puts it, only poopie-heads break promises. Out of the mouths of babes.

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You cried at The Princess and the Frog? Jesus rollerblading Christ, you really are in a bad way. I mean, Up, The Girl in the Fireplace, Wallace from The Wire - those I get. Those just mean you're not like secretly a Terminator or anything. But The Princess and the Frog? That just makes me want to give you hug and make you a sammich.
Pastrami plz. [sniffle]

Seriously. There are few things more demeaning than being comforted by under-7s, in a way that doesn't involve YOU indulging THEM. And I make that assertion as someone who's slept in his own vomit more than once.
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Old 04-16-2012, 02:44 PM   #7208
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I think you're doing the right thing. If you guys weren't so close, it wouldn't really matter so much if anything went wrong; but since you're sure that you want her in your life whether as a friend or, potentially, a girlfriend, it's worth holding out until you know for a fact that you're not going to start weeping over your ex in the middle of a date or anything.
^this... and dogs are such attention sluts...

Yep the lack of sex is difficult dude but you need to find yourself again after your last long term relationship, then you can go into a new relationship having a clear mind and know what you want...

Try to think about something else apart from sex... then when you've mastered it you can tell us all how to do it. Write romance novels or erotica or something - get it out of your system that way maybe?
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Old 04-16-2012, 02:54 PM   #7209
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Well, I'm not gonna start seeing mirages of Johnny Knoxville from A Dirty Shame just yet or anything. Just wish I could separate sex from other stuff & envy the friends I see falling into them with easy enthusiasm, is all. They seem to stagger off into one-night stands and come around all buzzing and up the next day, whereas mine just left me underwhelmed & vaguely depressed. And honestly, I don't think it's just a post-break-up thing. I was starting to feel that way about them around the time I first got with my ex.

Edit: And, to complete the cycle of woe, it's now apparent that I have become one of those people who overshares about their sex & personal life online. Neato.
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Old 04-16-2012, 04:02 PM   #7210
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Desktop has the beep illness.
Three beeps; meaning there's something wrong with my display features. It starts up, but no monitor display whatsoever. I plugged everything out and back in, even checked out my memory sticks and everything.
I didn't turn it back on since I unplugged everything. I really don't want to discover something's wrong with my mobo. Today was already screwed up enough.
Never want a repeat of this day again.
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Old 04-16-2012, 06:21 PM   #7211
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Well, I'm not gonna start seeing mirages of Johnny Knoxville from A Dirty Shame just yet or anything. Just wish I could separate sex from other stuff & envy the friends I see falling into them with easy enthusiasm, is all. They seem to stagger off into one-night stands and come around all buzzing and up the next day, whereas mine just left me underwhelmed & vaguely depressed. And honestly, I don't think it's just a post-break-up thing. I was starting to feel that way about them around the time I first got with my ex.

Edit: And, to complete the cycle of woe, it's now apparent that I have become one of those people who overshares about their sex & personal life online. Neato.
Maybe your friends are faking the buzz?? Plus I think it's a maturity thing as well - as you get older your focus shifts and your interests change and before you know it what you liked when you were younger, doesn't do it for you when you get older.

Oh and no, you aren't oversharing dude. It's just what is bothering you at the moment, and when you get it off your chest, you'll feel better.

If you want to PM me to just rant a bit, or whatever feel free.
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Old 04-16-2012, 08:56 PM   #7212
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it's now apparent that I have become one of those people who overshares about their sex & personal life online. Neato.
There are people who don't? I always kind of figured that people who don't talk about their sex and personal life online are either ashamed or are just really fucking boring and actually have no personal life to share.


Also I never break a promise
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Old 04-16-2012, 09:31 PM   #7213
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I spilled water on my laptop and now my keyboard won't work
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Old 04-16-2012, 10:01 PM   #7214
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Maybe it will start working again if it dries out. Put it in some rice overnight, that at least seems to work for phones so I would think it would also work with a laptop.
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Old 04-16-2012, 10:24 PM   #7215
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Maybe it will start working again if it dries out. Put it in some rice overnight, that at least seems to work for phones so I would think it would also work with a laptop.
this happened 3 days ago, ain't gonna get much drier.
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Old 04-16-2012, 10:31 PM   #7216
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Oh...damn, in that case I have no advice to offer, only my sympathy.
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Old 04-16-2012, 10:35 PM   #7217
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can i say how much the onscreen keyboard sucks? will pick up a usb keyboard soon.
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Old 04-16-2012, 10:39 PM   #7218
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On the plus side usb keyboards aren't terribly expensive.
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Old 04-17-2012, 12:52 AM   #7219
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What the fuckity fuck? It sounds like my upstairs neighbor is moving furniture around. It is just about 4 in the fucking morning, your furniture needs to stay exactly where the fuck it is.
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Old 04-17-2012, 02:41 AM   #7220
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I'm really glad Apathy's Child isn't friends with me on Spacebook. I think I'd stalk him too much.
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Old 04-17-2012, 06:18 AM   #7221
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Ah, you're not missing much. I promise, when I get my first period, you guys will totally be the first to know.

Re: spilled keyboards - it's a little late now, but if this isn't what you already tried as soon as it happened - if you spill shit on a keyboard, turn that fucker upside-down. IMMEDIATELY - don't even stop to swipe at it ineffectually with a towel while cursing. Then leave to drain overnight. I've lost a couple to liquid spillage (downside of writing drunk), but I've spilled on this one more times than I can count, and while it's possible the keyboard is haunted by something unkillable, I'd say it's more likely the extended drainage works.
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Old 04-17-2012, 08:43 AM   #7222
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I'd talk the shit out of this with her, just so she knows how things are.
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Old 04-17-2012, 06:33 PM   #7223
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So I'm at work and a kid puked in the pool, awesome, I closed the pool and alerted our lead pool tech so he can chem shock the pool and get out all the nasty bits of stuff (all of which takes about 45 minutes). While waiting to reopen the pool I got yelled at (not just harsh language or being mean, she was yelling to the point where her face was changing color) by this lovely woman because I closed the pool and wouldn't let her precious little kidlets swim.

And my family wonders why I stopped thinking that people are generally good.
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Old 04-17-2012, 09:02 PM   #7224
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So I'm at work and a kid puked in the pool, awesome, I closed the pool and alerted our lead pool tech so he can chem shock the pool and get out all the nasty bits of stuff (all of which takes about 45 minutes). While waiting to reopen the pool I got yelled at (not just harsh language or being mean, she was yelling to the point where her face was changing color) by this lovely woman because I closed the pool and wouldn't let her precious little kidlets swim.

And my family wonders why I stopped thinking that people are generally good.
I mean no disrespect to Virginia, but from what I've heard, Americans are more polite the further west you go, and more sincere the further east you go. I heard this from a British man(well not his exact words I merely formed a more elegant paraphrased hypothesis based on his general message) whose been to New York, Seattle, and Chicago, he was quite fond of Chicago. I know Good morning America once had a BBQ here in my city to celebrate how friendly people are here. Perhaps that's something to look out for when you come to Chicago.
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Old 04-17-2012, 10:08 PM   #7225
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I've had terrible guests from every state (except Hawaii, I've only had one guest from Hawaii and she was a doll) and quite a few countries. The thing is that it isn't about how welcoming people are, southern hospitality is a very real thing and I've very much enjoyed it, but when you work in hospitality or retail you will interact with many people who do not think of you as a human being, to them you are an object who's purpose is to satisfy their every whim and woe be to you if you can't.

Honestly there aren't any groups that have been any better or worse than others, they all just kind of suck in different ways.
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