Men who care more about their dicks than their Girlfriends.

BLEED REBELION!!! · 09-06-2008, 04:22 PM

This happened a couple weeks ago but I just decided to post it..

So my BF really likes sex. And he supposedly used to be a nympho. And I don’t like or want to have sex of any kind.
about 2 weeks into our relationship we were fooling around and he asked if we could go all the way. I said no. I've told him various reasons why I don’t want to. So he didn’t ask again for a while but I knew he wanted to. He likes getting oral better than sex and that’s what he really wanted me to do. I find it to be really gross, I told him as much. I also told him I wouldn’t do it ever. He guilt tripped me for giving him blue balls and I found it kinda funny.

So about 5 and a half months into our relationship he starts bugging me again for oral, and I kept saying no. He told me no one had ever made him wait so long. It became an ongoing argument or discussion.
6 months in: I feel kinda bad and worried. I understand that 6 months is a long time to wait for someone who is used to getting it all the time. I told him he could fuck or get oral from some one else as long as he 1 didn’t have any emotional feelings for her and 2 didn’t get her pregnant/catch aids.
I didn’t really want him to be someone else but I didn’t want him to be sexually frustrated. He turned that down, he said he wanted to be with me, because he loved me. I ended up giving in to him, and I gave him a BJ. I didn’t want to, I felt forced into it, and I was angry with him afterwards. He said I was making him feel like a bad person. It kinda made me think he was a bit of a bad person. He put his sexual needs over my emotional needs and I guess I put his sexual needs over my own emotional needs as well. Seeing as I gave in to him. I felt like I didn’t really have a real choice. I didn’t want to disappoint him.

I didn’t have any sexual experience before my BF I had only been kissed by one guy and that was as far as I had gotten. When I started dating my BF it was a very sudden change, I wasn’t used to be touched by men. I feel like I was some how supposed to go from - 30 to 60 in six short months. He wants me to give him more oral. And while he wont dump me if I refuse he acts sad and depressive.
I just feel like shit about this. I feel like we have a great relationship in all areas but this one. He has helped me allot. Its jus t he doesn’t understand what a big deal sex (and oral) is for me. It just makes me feel bad about myself. I felt really dirty afterwards really used. And I know he loves me but I feel bad if I tell him no. I feel like a whore/slut ..

Valravn · 09-06-2008, 04:32 PM

If you think the best for you is to wait so that it doens't destroy your relation then you should wait and make him understand how important is for you and how you appreciate the fact that he is waiting for you. However I personally don't find sex a thing to be ashamed of, is a natural thing that people who love each other share. That is why is suppostd to be special.

BLEED REBELION!!! · 09-06-2008, 04:39 PM

Yeah I think it can be special if a the right time with the right person. I was saying I was ashamed of oral seeing as that all I've done... i think its kinda gross.

JCC · 09-06-2008, 04:49 PM

First of all, why this gender separation as if chicks can't put sex before emotion?

Second of all, giving him a blowjob and then getting angry at him about it is fucking pathetic. Seriously, expecting him to be platonic is one thing, but doing it, and then telling him off because YOU did it is out of order and I would've broken up with you and told you to stop being such a spoilt bitch at that precise moment, I mean, seriously, what the fuck?

BLEED REBELION!!! · 09-06-2008, 04:57 PM

I wasnt saying females cant put sex before emotion, but for the purpose of this thread I olny really care to talk about men (or my man) seeing as I have never had this problem with a woman.

I didnt "tell him off" I actually just stoped being talkative and sat there. He tried kissing me and I pulled away, he got upset because I wasnt happy after I did it. I mean wtf did he expect I kept telling him I didnt want to and he kept telling me to do it or that he wanted me to. I was just trying to make him happy. After I did it I couldnt really control my emotions anymore and I got depressive and "distant".

JCC · 09-06-2008, 05:01 PM

So, you didn't want to do it, therefore, you did it, making you upset, and this is his fault?

Valravn · 09-06-2008, 05:03 PM

I don't think is his fault but both of them share the same amount of responsibility about it since he was pushing knowing her feelings and she kinda gave up for make him happy and going against what she though was right.

JCC · 09-06-2008, 05:09 PM

Did she ever think that maybe his sexual needs are part of his emotional needs, and therefore just as important as hers? Or is she just being the spoilt one and kicking up a fuss at having to reciprocate some sort of sacrifice?

TheBloodEternity · 09-06-2008, 05:11 PM

If he cared more about his dick than you, then this thread would be about him cheating.

gothicusmaximus · 09-06-2008, 05:21 PM

Sex is a vital part of any relationship. If what you want from the relationship in that respect is the exact opposite of what he wants from the relationship in that respect, it isn't going to work out.
What I'm dying to know is why the hell you don't like sex.

Splintered · 09-06-2008, 05:26 PM

Gothicus and JCC have the exact same post count (1,394). That's cool.

I'm failing to understand something, Bleed. You felt like you were forced in to committing an act that you didn't want too. Whether or not you had a choice is irrelevant to me, I'll leave that to other people. I'm confused as to why you're still with him, if you feel like he's forcing you to do something you're not happy with.

JCC · 09-06-2008, 05:33 PM

I'm wondering why he's still with you when you act all high and mighty, claim that your emotions are more important than his, parade around saying how sex is dirty and gross and ew then suck him off of your own accord and get pissy at him about it, leave him waiting for ages after you led him on in the first place and generally act like a brat.

Catch · 09-06-2008, 05:39 PM

If you don't like the guy why are you anchoring your self onto him.

Really, if you don't feel him, then drop him. I think Bleed Rebelion likes looking cool more than she likes her boyfriend.

TheBloodEternity · 09-06-2008, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Catch

Really, if you don't feel him, then drop him. I think Bleed Rebelion likes looking cool more than she likes her boyfriend.

Where the hell did you pull that assumption from?

Catch · 09-06-2008, 05:49 PM

She has known him long enough to know if she like him or not. If she doesn't have fluttering thoughts of being together forever, then the relationship is bad.

So why doesn't she figure out how to talk to him or move on. They can both find someone they like more. I think she is afraid to do that, because then she'll be single. Oh no!

gothicusmaximus · 09-06-2008, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBloodEternity

Where the hell did you pull that assumption from?

The same place from which she pulled 'Godslayer Jillian is a woman' and 'Shade doesn't mean 'boyfriend' when he says 'boyfriend''.
Catchspace, a pocket dimension filled with ridiculous, unfounded notions.

TheBloodEternity · 09-06-2008, 05:52 PM

...Hahaha...

Xombie · 09-06-2008, 05:53 PM

Catch, she doesn't want to have sex with him. That does not mean that she doesn't like him. I feel terribly sorry for you if you think that liking somebody and wanting to fuck them are interchangable. How do you feel about those who don't believe in pre-marital sex? Two people could be madly, sickeningly in love with each other without having sex.

BLEEDREBELION, you have no reason to be pissy to your boyfriend. He did not force you to give him a blowjob, and it's not his fault that you now feel dirty for having done it. I don't see how you can blame him when, as JCC said, you did it on your own accord.

Catch · 09-06-2008, 05:57 PM

I don't think you have to have sex with your boyfriend because you like them. However, if you like your boyfriend, you probably want to have sex with them.

If they are always annoying and you are afraid it won't work out, then drop them and they can be with someone who does like them.

Xombie · 09-06-2008, 06:07 PM

I cannot believe how often you generalize. You're fucking ridiculous, and it's not even worth telling you "that's not necessarily true," but I have to tell you that ALL THE TIME. I think it would be best for you to just not comment on...most matters.

Catch · 09-06-2008, 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BLEED REBELION!!!

So my BF really likes sex. And he supposedly used to be a nympho.

This statement is at the very top. I think she may feel like he just wants sex, but even if they have sex, he will leave her. If she is that hung up on his past, staying with him isn't doing anyone any favors.

TheBloodEternity · 09-06-2008, 06:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Catch

This statement is at the very top. I think she may feel like he just wants sex, but even if they have sex, he will leave her. If she is that hung up on his past, staying with him isn't doing anyone any favors.

My boyfriend LIKES sex.
LIKES.
Not liked.
LIKES.

JCC · 09-06-2008, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBloodEternity

My boyfriend LIKES sex.
LIKES.
Not liked.
LIKES.

Yeah, that's what she said.

Catch · 09-06-2008, 06:49 PM

So why is she with him if she doesn't like him? That doesn't make any sense at all.

I get apprensive when someone tells me they have been to anger management. I have worked through it once and it still ended badly when he was pushing the relationship too fast. He wanted to get married, while I was still being an open-minded person.

TheBloodEternity · 09-06-2008, 06:51 PM

She never said she doesn't like him. You're just assuming that.