Trite like Suicide

Razeal18 · 01-10-2011, 07:45 PM

It comes to my attention that i am still wandering back to the suicidal thoughts i had when i was unemployed and had too much time on my hands.

It comes to pass recently that i have a a fluffy job i enjoy and am good at. People in high places complimenting me on my work. bills are getting paid and i am getting laid.

i have no earthly right to complain about my situation but yet i still get flashes of my own lifeless body hanging from a tree outside or passed out in a pink puddle in the snow.

am i being stupid or should i seek professional help?

ape descendant · 01-10-2011, 09:06 PM

Seek professional help!

in.the.moon · 01-11-2011, 07:23 AM

I agree with professional help. You should nip those thoughts in the bud.

You don't want them to get proggressively worse to the point that it messes with your job, RELATIONSHIPS, & lifestyle in general.

*Twitch · 01-11-2011, 07:29 AM

Dude, depression doesn't neccassarily have anything to do with your situation. If you think it'll help, then yeah go see someone. Personally, the same sort of thing happens to me, but I choose to have to deal with the occasional suicidal thoughts rather than go back on the medication I was prescribed.

Though another way to think about it is this; thinking about kicking the shit out of someone is therapeutic, and as long as you're not actually going to do it, it hardly makes you a bad person, does it?

Regardless, hope you get it all worked out soon

Solumina · 01-11-2011, 12:13 PM

You say that you used to be depressed because life was shit. It doesn’t matter how awesome your life is now, while you were depressed your neural pathways rerouted themselves essentially making those depressive, suicidal thoughts easier for your brain to process because they were common, even though your life is better those neural patterns are still there and you need to reroute them again, this time for the better. A psychologist will be of great help while doing that. You could go to a psychiatrist but they will pretty much give you drugs and kick you out the door, which isn’t really going to help you.

Angelic Dissonance2 · 01-11-2011, 04:29 PM

It's true; your worst times will always be a part of you, maybe even define you. That is, if you let them. You are just going to have to find ways to cope.

If I were you, I would talk to friends in person--having someone there in flesh and blood somehow helps.

Catch · 01-12-2011, 12:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Razeal18

It comes to my attention that i am still wandering back to the suicidal thoughts i had when i was unemployed and had too much time on my hands.

It comes to pass recently that i have a a fluffy job i enjoy and am good at. People in high places complimenting me on my work. bills are getting paid and i am getting laid.

i have no earthly right to complain about my situation but yet i still get flashes of my own lifeless body hanging from a tree outside or passed out in a pink puddle in the snow.

am i being stupid or should i seek professional help?

Congradualations on finding a great job and you're good at it. If you're still feeling suicidal, I would first talk to a doctor and get checked out. You might be feeling fatigue, because of various aliments. They can refer you to a good psychologist if nothing else. I think most health insurance only covers psychological with a referal from a doctor anyway.

Razeal18 · 01-12-2011, 05:54 PM

Thanks Guys. I'm not a suicide risk fyi but it is troubling none the less. until i can see a professional i'll stick with my good friend Sailor Jerry. Medicating is a standard in modern medicine, self medicating is a standard among the poor and crazy. Am a bit of both. Cheers

*Twitch · 01-12-2011, 06:41 PM

Haha for true bro, the ganja works a lot better for that kind of thing. Sure it's illegal, but one toke off the bong accomplishes what a mickey of vodka couldn't. Not to mention if you're going to self medicate, at least do it with something that won't trash your liver.

This is most likely just a me thing, but if you like hard music like metal or punk, then I find a nice mosh pit, rough but friendly, cleanses a lot of self-destructive thoughts and urges.

tyr · 01-12-2011, 07:05 PM

You need a fight club. Go find an MMA dojo and get your ass kicked. This will really relax you... after your done getting your ass kicked.

Oh yeah... and what the post above this one said too.

Razeal18 · 01-12-2011, 07:08 PM

i was hoping for a nude wrestling partner but you know what they say whis in one hand n shit n the other, see wich one fills up first. i only wish i had weed.

*Twitch · 01-12-2011, 07:16 PM

bahaha, go out and get some. Finding pot is as easy as getting out of bed. Speaking of which, I do believe it's time for some natural mystic to perfume the air

Razeal18 · 01-12-2011, 07:54 PM

the booze has turned on me. why did i have to get a call from my ex in my drunken stupor.

heres some esoteric knowledge : we're born, we live, we die, we rot.
what matters is the passion we feel be it fight, fuck, flight or fortune after it ends, it ends.
The only thing you can do, is have the best time of your life.
now i know why Nero burned rome. They only thing better than the creation of something is its total and utter destruction.

CuckooTuli · 01-13-2011, 07:29 AM

Wait - so does that mean you ARE suicidal, or you're NOT suicidal?...

Razeal18 · 01-15-2011, 08:57 PM

i am leaning to suicide but i have a warehouse full of excuses not to do it immediatly. just one of those scenarios that since i have no commitments no real responsibilities except to myself, and no overbearing reason to live. in the off hand chanse i do feel froggy at least i know i have options

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTP7v...6aHUQc&index=2

Tobi Addams · 01-15-2011, 10:04 PM

I remember running out of reasons to live but I couldn't find any reasons to die, so here I am still just chugging along, a little curious about what the next year will bring. My PS3 helps.