Sexuality - Page 77

NachtSorcier · 05-14-2006, 04:45 AM

Ok, first of all, I have to ask. What do my avatar, my introduction thread, and my signature have to do with my sexuality? My avatar is a character from RHPS, a movie I would adore even if I were straight. My signature is part of a well-known Cure song. And if you're referring to the part of my intro where I mentioned I live with my partner, so what? If I lived with a girl I'd have said that instead. Hell, if I still lived with my parents I would have said that.

To the point of repeatedly stating my sexuality, that is a moot point. I could very well say you flaunted heterosexuality by "rubbing your boobies" in Ben's face. I could make such a comment about a male or a female; chances are it would be in good fun as I suppose it was for you and Ben.

And as for gays who don't believe in gay marriage and who believe it was a choice, they are very much in the minority, but that is beside the point. I apologized for unintentionally expressing the wrong idea, what more do you want?

NachtSorcier · 05-14-2006, 04:55 AM

One more thing I forgot to say: I realize that there is a small number in the gay community that have beliefs adverse to most of us. That is part of the reason I apologized in the first place. I realize that in making such a small statement I was misleading and confusing. That I apologize for.

And to repeat, I do not feel that my sexuality makes me different or better than everyone else. We are equal. That is why I am so active in fighting for equality. I am an open-minded individual, but I am human and I make mistakes. So once more, I apologize.

Ben Lahnger · 05-14-2006, 07:24 AM

*sigh*

Okay NachtSorcier, I'm gonna pass on all that, other than to say it's cool that you're here, and to point out to you that if you start off expecting a fight you'll likely get one.

And this is a very enlightened, pro-diversity enviroment. So when you say "That is why I am so active in fighting for equality", recognize that you started to battle where there was no fight.

There ARE way too many places in this world where your energy and dedication are needed to help level the playing field. This just isn't one of those places.

I have seen you comments elsewhere on this board, and some of them entertained or interested me. Just know that the people here will not judge you by any label you put out there (gay, conservative, black, female, short, lactose intolerant, vegetarian, etc.) but on how you behave and communicate to them. And what could be fairer, eh?

Ben Lahnger · 05-14-2006, 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NachtSorcier

...

To the point of repeatedly stating my sexuality, that is a moot point. I could very well say you flaunted heterosexuality by "rubbing your boobies" in Ben's face. I could make such a comment about a male or a female; chances are it would be in good fun as I suppose it was for you and Ben.

I'm not sure I agree with that. I have a gay friend I met on a board like this. We spent some time posting in the same place and responding to posts from one another and we got to know and like each other. And he started periodically sending me lovely pictures of beautiful women with luscious boobies. Obviously he wasn't flaunting anything ... he was just sending me something he knew I'd enjoy.

What if Sanctus is a lesbian but just offers to rub her cyber-boobies in my face because she knows it makes me happy?

It's a small quibble, but I thought it was a point worth making.

I wonder if his birthday is coming soon. I just found a picture of a hunk of a man holding a birthday cake and not wearing much else ... I think he'd like it.

Ben Lahnger · 05-14-2006, 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sanctus Dei

Ben.. Thankyou for being you. *rubs boobies in your face in appreciation*

Sanctus, thank you! You are a lovely lady, a walking phermone factory, a warrior priestess, a wet-dream incarnate, a person whose opinion I treasure greatly and a goddess among women.

Oh, and if you are a lesbian, I don't want to know!

NachtSorcier · 05-14-2006, 10:07 AM

When I said that I fight for equality, I did not mean here, I meant in government, ie, gay marriage, etc. I realize that this place is a rather liberal one; that's one of the reasons I joined up.

And when I said that I could say that Sanctus was being flippantly heterosexual, I did not mean that I felt that way, only that I could say that; saying something doesn't make it true.

The whole reason I posted on this thread in the first place was because the poster wanted to know where we stand on the issue of sexuality. My intention was to say that you are free to be who are, that is all. Not that I felt anyone on here disliked me because I am gay. On the contrary, I felt rather safe in being open about it here. Not flaunt it, mind you, only that I don't feel I should be scared and hide it.

I rather like all of the people whose posts I've seen, and I've not felt threatened at all. My intention here is not to battle with anyone unless they are blatantly deserving of it, ie. they are hateful in what they say, etc. For example, if someone called me a ******, I would call them on that. If someone called someone else a ******, I would call them on that. Unless someone proves to me they are homophobic, racist, or whatever, I assume they are ok with it.

I prefer to make friends, not enemies. :-)

Oh, and my birthday isn't until December, but I would be glad to take a nude man with a cake anyday of the year. ;-)

NachtSorcier · 05-14-2006, 10:13 AM

It took me a minute to realize you meant sending a nude cake man to your friend...yeah, I'm sure he'd like one too. ;-P

Ben Lahnger · 05-14-2006, 12:13 PM

Nope, you had it right the first time. It's a photo of a buff, naked man holding a birthday cake at a strategic point just below his navel. I'll send it to my friend by email for his birthday.

Sanctus Dei · 05-14-2006, 01:32 PM

I like you Nacht... a lot even, I think we may have scored another lifer guys. *psst* He talks like a big person kiddies!! Yay! Score for for maturity!! It's been a lacking trait in our recent joinee's...

One thing though.. your previous user title mentioned "Queer" Your into openly states you're gay.. (or atleast that's what I'd gather through light deduction skills)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nacht

Sociology was my best subject in high school. I just got really into it because it provided an outlet to be able to talk about gay and lesbian issues in school. Also, I want to be a sex counselor and I think sociology would help in that capacity.

That comment along with your "queer" user title and a few other posts you've made previous to the "I'm Gay" statement kinda made re-stating the obvious moot. BUT I understand your reasons now so it's no longer an issue. I'm glad your here Nacht, and I appreciate your calm laid back responses... Kudos baby, you rock already!

NachtSorcier · 05-14-2006, 06:36 PM

I understood your confusion, Sanctus, and I was doing my best to rectify it.

I like you a lot, too. Yay for friends.

The title "Queer Magician" was just a filler until I could think of a better one, by the way. I just kinda pulled it outta my ass.

Ben Lahnger · 05-15-2006, 06:13 AM

Nothing wrong with that. The process of refining a cyber-personna is an ongoing process. I've seen many changes by folks here over time, and I can't tell you the number of people who've said they would change their user name if they could.

So, the thread is 52 pages long and we've moved through many different topics and discussions since it was first started. I'm trying to think of a new topic and drawing a blank this morning ... not feeling particularly creative today, so ...

Hurray for oral sex!!!

WolfMoon · 05-15-2006, 09:00 AM

I like oral sex!

But I've found that if someone is particularly good with their hands, I don't complain about not getting it.

Although I will be asking for it soon...

Ben Lahnger · 05-15-2006, 01:52 PM

Oh, christmas ... I especially like it when I get to open a box and poke around inside!

Kinflame · 05-15-2006, 07:03 PM

Virginity?

I want to wait 'til 14. I'm thinking next summer.

Gone everywhere with pretty much everything with several girls except with my mouth and of course, haven't gone all the way. I'd have to say making out stoned seems tame, but it's probably the best experience I've ever had, especially with 'Vigil' blaring. At least I think it was Vigil. Listening to Lamb of God now brings back memories.

WizardElement5 · 05-15-2006, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kinflame

Virginity?

I want to wait 'til 14. I'm thinking next summer.

Hi Kinflame. My advice would be don't set yourself a particular age, but wait until you fall in love. Even then, don't push it, wait till it comes naturally for both you and your partner. I am not going to tell you what age is right and what age is wrong, but sex does bring with it some very BIG responsibilities, eg. precaution against STDs, pregnancy, commitment to the physical and emotional well being of you both, as well as certain legal requirements. I promise you it is better to be too cautious than foolhardy and that approach will almost certainly bring more enjoyment for you and your partner in the long run.

Best wishes,
Wizard.

Draconysius · 05-15-2006, 08:16 PM

I agree with you wholeheartedly, Wizard. I don't believe that a certain age should be pre-defined for sexual intercourse. We have seen -especially here- that age doesn't equal maturity. I see people in their late twenties every day that act like they're ten, and vice versa (much less often, unfortunately). One can't control his or her hormones, but can fight their urges with moderate effort. Strictly-pleasureful sex is such a minute thing, in the end. When you get the urge, you'll believe that you need it to survive, but as soon it's over, you'll always regret it.

WizardElement5 · 05-15-2006, 08:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Draconysius

One can't control his or her hormones, but can fight their urges with moderate effort. Strictly-pleasureful sex is such a minute thing, in the end. When you get the urge, you'll believe that you need it to survive, but as soon it's over, you'll always regret it.

Hi Draconysius. Here your opinion is very different from my own, which, of course, is fine. For myself, however, sex, (and sex play), for pleasure is perhaps the single most profoundly enjoyable thing in my life and my only regret when it's over is that it is indeed over. My point to Kinflame was not that he should try to control his urges, but that he should indeed be governed by his natural uges and not have sex for the first time at some pre-determined age, eg 14, because he has decided for some intellectual, (pre-thought out) reason that that is the correct age. The process of falling in love, getting to know one another and exploring one's sexuality and physical being is something that for the first time is likley to develop naturally over quite some period of time. My point was that this should not be rushed to meet some arbitrary deadline, but that he should indeed give heed to the natural rhythms of himself and his partner as they grow towards maturity over the next few years.

Kinflame · 05-16-2006, 02:46 PM

I've been in love, and am currently in love.

I only know they want me and I want them forever, and not neccessarily physically. But for some reason I just don't feel ready, and 14 right now seems a good time. If it comes around and such isn't the case then I'll wait, but I don't think that's gonna happen.

WizardElement5 · 05-16-2006, 02:58 PM

That's cool. I hope your love rocks. Best wishes...

Tuk Keedair · 05-16-2006, 03:33 PM

*edit*

Go molest Wharf!

Sanctus Dei · 05-16-2006, 04:55 PM

Wiz darling.. due to possible legal issues (and no disrespect to anyone under 18) please refrain from offering advice of any kind in the area of sex to minors. In the wrong hands any information you share has the possiblity to bite you in the ass if someone gets upset.

Sorry guys, it be the truth.

Sobeh · 05-16-2006, 05:15 PM

So Sanctus, what will it take for your 'information' to bite me in the ass?

Of course, on second thought I looked at your avvy again, and it kinda freaked me out on the tail end of that thought... so maybe just a nibble.

Sanctus Dei · 05-16-2006, 05:32 PM

It depends baby.. what do you have to offer? *intrigued grin*

NachtSorcier · 05-16-2006, 08:28 PM

Just for sharing purposes: I lost my virginity when I was 15 to a guy who was 20. We were both drunk, but I was well-aware of what I was doing and I don't regret it. We weren't in love, but that was ok with both of us. It was just harmless fun. I certainly don't condone breaking the law, but I do believe that people have to make their own choices; hopefully they will be wise in those decisions.

Oral sex...hmm...well, I have to say I like to give more than receive. I prefer my partners to use their hands in my neither regions. Of course if giving gets him going, I certainly won't turn him down.

Ben Lahnger · 05-17-2006, 06:36 AM

Kinflame, I have to say that I find myself scratching my head when someone who is in the around 14-to-16-years-of-age group is saying they've been in love several times. I know I'm looking at this from the age of 47, but trust me when I tell you that your own opinion will change with time. You'll look back in ... let's say, maybe ... ten years time ... and you'll think to yourself that you really didn't have a clue what love is at that age.

This is not a knock on you ... or any other person who is going through that age. I'm just saying that the pressures and challenges of that age make it very beneficial to bond with someone in a way that might feel like love, but is too need-based to really be true love. And I'm reasonably certain that this will raise a very visceral reaction from you now, but someday you will agree with me.