the Corrupted Wishes game

[(heartofflames)]

Granted, a peculiar disease prevents him from talking about Java, but, in his eagerness to express his enthusiasm for Java, he gives you 30 page readings about it.

I wish I weren't socially retarted.

[Lochnar]

Granted! Everyone loves your personal flare! Sadly, you begin to notice fights breaking out in the street whenever you are near as more an more people struggle to be close to you. The violence escalates quickly and you are soon surrounded by a perpetual bloody melee. As the population dwindles, you are seen as the ultimate resource and a planetary treasure. Mobs, representing the remaining factions, rush you in the street and attempt to take you back to their respective bases of operation. Hands seize you from all directions and pull in most of them. They all succeed, in part, in returning you (or some of you) to their separate bases. The world continues in a chaotic slide to oblivion as the few remaining people fight over the Holy Relics (your mummified body parts). This fight is to the death. The last remaining human being, a Ms Tina Xan, cuddles your remains so vigorously that she starves to death from not caring for her own needs on August 12 of 2014.

I wish I could make the story from any book come true.

[Anarasha]

Granted, but without your knowing it, you make a certain nasty number of characters come to life without knowing it, kinda like in Inkheart, only the ending for you won't be nearly as nice as you are devoured by a black dragon.


I wish that I owned the best model of every instrument in existence.

[(heartofflames)]

Granted. But you also have no place to put them, so they end up spilling out the windows, and eventually smothering you in your kitchen one day. And since you are buried under them, you aren't found until a week later, your body decomposed and reeking. Your loved onces, overcome with greed at the sight of these gems, steal all of them and pawn them for a hundreth of their value, and throw your body in a ditch.

I wish I could bottle sleep and consume it whenever I wanted.

[JethroAranas]

Granted, but then because of too much consumption your stomach grows larger and larger and suddenly bursts out all the things you've been eating and drinking and caused flood all over your town.


I wish Megan Foxx and I were married.

[Anarasha]

Granted; It turns out that she is a secret lesbian with a fetish of caging up men and torturing them. You are found several weeks later, dead from starvation.


I wish I wasn't socially awkward.

[(heartofflames)]

Granted, you are now not socially awkward, but shunned by all living things, human and non-human. The flowers lean away from you as you walk past, birds move their nests, and there is always a 8 foot radius of clearing whenever you walking into a crowd. At a concert, you enthusiastically rush to the front row, only to have the band wince at you and have you escorted out by security, who wear latex up to their elbows and refuse to speak to you as they drag you out. Finally, you go mad from loneliness and heartbreak, and are carted into an asylum, where you die a quiet death and are thrown unceremoniously into a ditch.

I wish I knew the secret to success.

[JethroAranas]

Granted. But you still don't know how to do it. You just know it. That's it.


I wish the Earth was triangle.

[Lochnar]

Granted, the earth is now a triangle and everyone slides off...never to be seen again.

I wish I had already finished moving.

[Amunet]

Granted, but because you're finished early your friends all decide to move as well and because you owe them favors, you have to help them all move for the next 6 months! muahahahahahahaha MUAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!!!!!
(cough.... sorry I got a lil carried away there....)

I wish that I had a beautiful Steinway & Sons Grand Piano, to play at my every whim... sigh

[RavenHallows.]

Granted, but for reasons unknown it will fall from the sky on top of your car. Destruction guaranteed.

I wish my hair would grow long faster.

[Anarasha]

Granted, your hair now grows so fast that it suffocates you.

I wish I had the power to rid the world of evil and cruelty.

[Luv2H8]

GRANTED! With your newly founded power you rid the world of everything evil. Eventually the government sees this as a new possibility for super soldiers and you are kidnapped. you manage to escape, but end up killing the entire military and the world now sees you as threat and declares war on you. Years go by, you are the only human left standing. Years pass by, you age, you die alone. The end.

I wish my coat wasn't faded from overuse.

[Lethe]

Granted! You realize you hate the coat and never use it.

I wish I was happier.

[Luv2H8]

Granted...but you develop an addiction to anti-depressants.
I wish it was 5 degrees cooler.

[Lethe]

Granted, ice cubes magically fall from the sky onto you, wherever you are at this very moment.

I wish my computer wasn't closing my internet every fifteen minutes.

[Luv2H8]

Granted. It now does it every 15 seconds.
I wish I was slightly more attractive. Just a wee bit.

[the-nihilist]

Granted. Unfortunately for you, however, your self esteem plummets. You develop an aversion to socializing with others, to the point where you could be classified as a hermit. While others may find you attractive, you will continue to irrationally see yourself as the ugliest person on the planet. Your self-loathing will never overcome your innate fear of death, and so you will forever live your life feeling like a pariah and too ashamed to get professional help until the day you die bitter and alone.

I wish I had something better to do than post inane messages on a goth forum on a Friday night.

[Luv2H8]

Originally Posted by the-nihilist

Granted. Unfortunately for you, however, your self esteem plummets. You develop an aversion to socializing with others, to the point where you could be classified as a hermit. While others may find you attractive, you will continue to irrationally see yourself as the most ugly person on the planet. Your self-loathing will never overcome your innate fear of death, and so you will forever live your life feeling like a pariah and too ashamed to get professional help until the day you die bitter and alone.

Nothing new. At least you tried.

Anyway, GRANTED! But, you're still here anyway.

I wish life was more entertaining.

[Lethe]

Granted. Your life is now entertaining so much that you get your own t.v. show, but only to the masses and your life spirals out of control into a montage of High School Musical-esque episodes.

I wish my sister wasn't so annoying.

[Luv2H8]

THE HORROR!!
Granted. She becomes your BFF and eventually finds YOU annoying. You hang yourself three days later.

I wish I wasn't paranoid.

[Pooka]

Granted, but he has herpies.

I wish I had a job where the manager wasn't pycho

[ape descendant]

Hey pooka.... why not introduce yourself.. it is our tradition.

[Geoluhread]

Granted. You are now your own boss and have to work nonstop to support your drug habit.

I wish that I can read 600 pages in an hour.

[Midnight_Carnival]

Granted.
You learn to speed read in jail where the only book they let you have is the bible - you spend decades reading and re-reading the same book.

I wish all social media disappeared for good.