Goth Mummies And Daddys - Page 3

mortalitas incomitatus · 01-23-2006, 07:05 AM

my son has a mo-hawk (his choice) so i wouldnt worry bout it.
plus he picked out two bestfriends at child care who's parents are all alternative. so the kids dont care how we dress or what we look like.
and in my experience most kids are very accepting of different things, kids love piercings and coloured hair and stripy stockings and big boots etc...
parents will and do often pass their narrowmindedness on to their kids but i would not worry bout it too much.
i think the problem with teasing will come in high school when children are less tolerant of anything different, but you have many years till then.
don't stress just be yourself.
xXx

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-23-2006, 07:27 AM

That's good to know! It is true about most kids I've interacted with. The kids of a friend of mine used to call my labret a face earring. I still worry, though.

The mister and I talk about how kids almost always have to *rebel* and with us as parents, what are they going to rebel against? With our luck we've decided we'll have preppy kiddies who are ashamed of our tats and insist we listen to what's on the Top 40 when their friends visit.

We'll love our kids no matter what 'label' they fit into, mind you, but it would be so beautifully ironic.

A mowhawk! That's just great. If we have a boy I have already given in to dad's requests that we shape his hair like a baby 'hawk.

Wise Child · 01-23-2006, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mortalitas incomitatus

every tom dick and harry felt they had the need/right to comment on my age when i was pregnant.
*hiss*

A friend of mine had her son when she was sixteen and while she was pregnant, it got to the point where she dreaded going out - she got disapproving glances wherever she went and kids, in particular, would hiss "slag" at her as she walked down the street. It must have been hard - obviously we did what we could for her, but ultimately it was something only she could face - and I have the utmost respect for anyone who can hold their head up throughout that kind of judgement. No, it's usually not ideal to get pregnant at such a young age - I'm speaking generally in terms of financial stability etc. - but the fact that those who find themselves in that situation take on the task of parenthood despite the fact that they face more adversity than older parents entitles them to respect in my opinion. Shit, I don't know if I'll ever be ready for it.

WolfMoon · 01-23-2006, 09:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Manimal

Oh - and is it just me or are pregnant women - like a just a month or three - friggin hot as Hell?

No, it's not just you!

When I was only a few months along with Sevi I had a bunch of guys hit on me. I was shocked.

EPS, like there was ever any doubt that that boi is yours!

I've seen pix!

Ben Lahnger · 01-23-2006, 10:56 AM

I don't have much to say in this thread, but it's obvious to me after a page and one half that there is much need for it to be here ... as a sounding board, a place for advice and counseling, as well as affirmation. Plus, I just love the "my kid did this funny thing today" stories.

I dated a woman for 5 years, and then we separated after 9 years of marriage - in part because I wanted to have kids and she did not. There were other reasons, but that was a big one. Now it is many years later and I still do not have any kids.

It's okay if you have children by accident (should you choose to go ahead and keep them,) but don't treat them like an accident.

Don't ever take having these precious jewels for granted.

mortalitas incomitatus · 01-23-2006, 04:01 PM

isn't every one an accident now days?

who plans now days?

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-23-2006, 11:48 PM

*raises hand*

Not me!

Ben Lahnger · 01-24-2006, 01:05 PM

Remember earlier, when I said I still don't have any kids. Well, I kinda do ... I've unofficially become a guardian to my girlfriend's kids. So I have a question.

Should I be frustrated by the following?

The older of my girlfriend's two teenage daughters (the 17 year old) went to the nurse's office sick again today, and I had to go pick her up and bring her home again for (I'm estimating) the 10th time this school year. Now this child was/is daddy's little princess, and the way my girlfriend's ex raised her led her to believe she could do no wrong. She was spoiled and pampered ... and I guess I should be grateful that she is as grounded as she is at this point.

However, she is a hypochondriac and over sensitive, and so when she has the littlest blister or scratch, we hear from her about how painful it is. I always want to tell her how painful it is biting my tongue that hard, but I resist. I swear she has claimed to be too sick to be at school more days this year than all the days I missed in 12 years of public education.

Now here's the part that grates me. She's been this way for the nearly 5 years I've been dating her mother, and she's missed a bunch of days each year. But today when I went to the clinic to pick her up, she had convinced the nurse that she had a more significant problem than a tummyache. The nurse said that since she had run a fever so many times this year, we should have a doctor do some blood work on her and test to see if she has a compromised immune system!

Oh, yeah, that makes sense. She's missed a bunch of random days of school each year (all her life according to her mother) and suddenly we should jump up and pay for a doctor's office visit and medical bills for testing? This girl claimed a stomachache today because yesterday she got a charley horse and didn't want to climb up and down 3 flights of stairs to get to and from classes today. I know this to be true.

I guess I should be thankful she turns 18 in a couple of months. But what kind of a life is she gonna have as an adult if she thinks this is the answer every time she has an 'owie?'

Ben Lahnger · 01-24-2006, 01:48 PM

darkangel, thanks for the feedback. Yes, absolutely I would have a talk with her Mother before I would have that conversation with her. And to be honest, we have said those kinds of things to her. She is on notice that as of when she graduates (or finishes this semester - there's some question of whether she will graduate or not due to her attendance) she will be 18 and will be expected to get a job and pay her way around here. But I'm not sure how much good it's done to tell her these things. I guess we will see.

WolfMoon · 01-24-2006, 02:08 PM

DA, you've got your head on straight, girl. I like that.

My daughter is starting to sing along to her song videos. I tear up when I hear her sing "Head, chochers, knees, toes. Knee, toes."

Awwwww, my lil baby's growing up.

Sevi can stand all by himself for a few seconds.

*sigh*

It's all just so much sand slipping through my grasp.

edible_eye · 01-24-2006, 06:54 PM

hiya, geisha. you've been missed 'round these parts.

Ben Lahnger · 01-24-2006, 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by darkangel29

Ben... don't just ask her. TELL HER! Give her the bill, let her phone get cut off and watch her grow some responsibility. She needs to realize that the world is cruel and cold, and that requires a certain amount of maturity. The fact is... she needs the job now. Write up a contract about her graduating. And if she doesn't get it that this is serious, start her rent as of her "graduation date" at 400 a month.

Oh, make no mistake, she's been told all those things seriously. I never said we asked them. And in some regards she's done a bunch of growing up since a stint two years ago when she ran away from home and did drugs for six months. She's recovered (mostly) from the missed time at school, and is getting great grades - all A's and B's. And she is making plans to go on to college, so this is good too!

I'm still worried about whether her attendance will keep her from graduating on time. But I've told her that if she doesn't get it done by the end of this semester (her senior year,) I will personally driver her down to get her G.E.D. and we'll be done with it. And I am highly irritated by her willingness to play "I'm a fragile little victim" when it comes to every sniffle and scratch. But as I said, she is remarkably well grounded, all things considered.

Her dad pays for her cell phone. He is now a registered sex offender (long story - doesn't have anything to do with her. I know this for a fact.) He is not allowed by law to be around ANY underage children, so it is the main way he keeps in touch with her. So taking it away isn't even on the table and I'm the last person on earth who should try to convince him that it should be. But I don't think that is necessary either.

So when June rolls around and she either has her diploma or her GED, we will expect her to get a job. Right now the job market sucks, as I've explained elsewhere here in detailing my own job search. There are too many Katrina survivors calling Houston home these days. And threatening to throw her out if she doesn't pay rent is my kind of parenting, but with apartment occupancy at 95% full (again, Katrina survivors), her mother probably won't be on board with it.

But you know, I just get frustrated with the hypochondriac thing. I worked 4.5 years on my last job without calling in sick once. Princess has come home early from school once a week since Christmas break.

I'm expecting that one day the school counselors will tell her she won't get all her credits this semester because of attendence and cannot graduate this year. She'll come home and cry. She'll ask her mom to fix it. Mom will tell her there is nothing she can do. And I will tell her "I told you so." But I'll take no pleasure in it.

Empty_Purple_Stars · 01-25-2006, 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeishaGirl

Have I? I didn't think I was established enough around here for people to notice my absense. But i feels good to be missed. How are you, EE?

I missed you as well.

We were just inquiring as to your whereabouts today, in fact.

Good timing!!

And a resounding A-Motherfucking-Men to the hordes of children that are growing up way too fast.

It absolutely sickens me.

But that's a soapbox I am too weary to climb up on right now..

Maybe tommorrow.

Good to see you back nonetheless..

Ben Lahnger · 01-25-2006, 07:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeishaGirl

And another thing that really irks me about some parents is how they're letting their children grow up too fast.

Geisha, you may not think that you've established yourself much here. But even though you may not post as often as some others, I've notice that your posts usually contain thoughtful discourse like this. I also appreciate it, and miss it when you are gone.

And I strongly agree with you on this point in particular. The price these children (and society as a whole) pay for lost childhood is too high.

edible_eye · 01-25-2006, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeishaGirl

How are you, EE?

me? i'm fine, thanx - and sexual as hell, just to keep on topic.

WolfMoon · 01-25-2006, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by edible_eye

me? i'm fine, thanx - and sexual as hell, just to keep on topic.

Er, yeah, that's new.

Ben Lahnger · 01-25-2006, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by edible_eye

me? i'm fine, thanx - and sexual as hell, just to keep on topic.

Um, while it's true that Goth-type folks usually have to be sexual to become Mummies and Daddies, I don't really think that was on topic.

e_e, maybe you just lost track of what thread you were in?

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-26-2006, 01:14 AM

Here is a picture of my 'squirt' at 7 weeks. I am now at 17, and will have more ultrasound pics in late February when I find out if it is a girl or boy. Here s/he is!!!

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-26-2006, 01:16 AM

Also, either in this thread or another one EPS requested a belly pic. Now there are belly pictures in the Picture Post...but I'm not quite sure I should throw a pregnant belly in there with the mix. Might be a bit of a shock to the eyes

Here is my belly 2 weeks ago!

I hope that it isn't too weird to see pregga bellies on gnet...

tenet_2012 · 01-26-2006, 01:35 AM

I love preggo bellies!

It is a sign that this world isn't going to complete shit.

There is hope, yet.

Empty_Purple_Stars · 01-26-2006, 01:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blushing Heliophobe

Also, either in this thread or another one EPS requested a belly pic. Now there are belly pictures in the Picture Post...but I'm not quite sure I should throw a pregnant belly in there with the mix. Might be a bit of a shock to the eyes

Here is my belly 2 weeks ago!

I hope that it isn't too weird to see pregga bellies on gnet...

Wow. Your tummy is sooooooooo Beautiful..

That actually made me tear up. Simply amazing and wonderful.

I really needed some Purity to wash the funk off of the Gnet Detective Work I have spent the last hour plus doing..

Makes me want to rub your little Buddha Belly..

Do you get that alot? Random strangers wanted to rub my tummy when I was pregnant, which was a bit unsettling at times..

We would love to see your next Ultrasound when you have it. Feeling any flutters yet?

I think that was my favorite part about being pregnant. Feeling my son move inside me was amazing and humbling all at once. In fact, he was a Beastie Boys fanatic when he was In Utero, everytime I played anything by them he would go nuts..

Of course he could have been telling me to turn that shit off..

I prefer my version though..

Thanks so much for sharing that with us, it will make Manimal horny and happy all at the same time tommorrow.

Empty_Purple_Stars · 01-26-2006, 01:48 AM

Here's a couple of my Hellspawn from his birthday the other night.

I can't imagine where he gets his silliness from..

*rolls eyes*

That boy of mine is 100% Grade A Ham..

Makes a Mom proud..

*sniffles*

tenet_2012 · 01-26-2006, 01:56 AM

You should be a proud mother, E_P_S.

You created life. That in itself should be the product of pride.

I hope you raise him to be a freethinker.

Blushing Heliophobe · 01-26-2006, 01:58 AM

Aw, thank you guys! I was hoping that it wouldn't be considered bad taste.

Purity. Hehehe...

Not many people notice my belly yet; it's cold here and you can't tell under sweaters/coats. Though once a woman I know stopped me and wanted me to show her friends...I obliged, but it was still kind of weird.

My babe loves to kick me after I eat. It doesn't hurt at this point so I like it. It's very reassuring; before I had no clue what was going on in there but every once in a while when s/he kicks I know s/he is okay.

Your boy is so cute! He looks so much like my sisters (they are half Mexican as well). Everyone else was right; he does have your truly dramatic eyes.

Empty_Purple_Stars · 01-26-2006, 02:08 AM

Thanks guys.. He is the light of my life..

He is also smart as a whip, and yes I am raising him to be as Free thinking and warm hearted as I possibly can.

We talked about Martin Luther King on MLK Day and he was very upset when he realized someone killed him simply because of the color of his skin. His teacher had explained it to his 1st grade class, but he wanted a more detailed explanation.

It hurts to exsplain the unpleasant truth about the world to him, but he really is wise beyond his years in many ways and truly a very special soul.

He is also fascinated with Reincarnation, which I think is really cool.

I love him more than my own life.

He is also the best and brightest 'thing' I have ever had the Grace to be part of in my existence..

And with those Al Pacino eyes of his, I know I am going to have my hands full when he realizes girls aren't yucky anymore..

Kisses to all. I am going to hibernate..

Night.