the Corrupted Wishes game

[Aaroneet]

Granted, but you are only known for your soon-to-become extensive knowledge of World War II.

I wish my head would stop playing the song "No Excuses" by Alice in Chains.

[Nevan]

Granted - but your head stops playing everything alltogether, and you never hear another song ever again.

I wish I was more assertive.

[LaBelleDameSansMerci]

Granted, but you're so assertive that people think you're controlling and end up leaving you due to your lack consideration.

I wish I could paint better...

[Aaroneet]

Granted, but you can't paint well enough to be acknowledged for it.

I wish I was a more talented math student.

[PutridLily]

Oh, I also wish that. Anyway, granted. You start assigning equations to every aspect of life and eventually go insane.

I wish my nightmares would leave me alone.

[Aaroneet]

Granted, but tney are replaced with frequent and irksome day dreams that, like improved math skills that are applied far too often, render you insane.

I wish my brother didn't start school until the same day I did.

[biohazard]

Granted, but now you both start 3 days earlier than usual, and go on vacation 3 days later.

I wish I had more spare time.

[Aaroneet]

Granted, but then you have too much spare time, and you wish you had less.

I wish I could live a stress-free life.

[Your Darkest Secret]

Granted, but while you are swanning around living your happy-happy stress free life you have to watch your parents, friends, family, everyone you care about slowly being consumed by their own problems and woes, and you become alienated from them because you can no longer relate. Everyone hates you because they envy you your non-stressy existence, and you end up alone in the world (but stress-free).

I wish my hand would stop shaking every time I try to draw my goddamn eyebrows on.

[Aaroneet]

Granted, but your hand then becomes so steady that your eyebrows become a suspiciously precise, artificial-looking work of art.

I wish I could have slightly thinner eyebrows.

[d.Nox]

Granted, but you realize to your horror that thinner eyebrows make your nose look enormous.

I wish I didn't drive a minivan [runs and hides in shame].

[LaBelleDameSansMerci]

Granted. You now drive a suv.

I wish I had a proper sense of time.

[Lapin]

Granted. You are now late on purpose.

I wish there was something good showing at the cinema.

[LaBelleDameSansMerci]

Granted. But everyone else is there too, so you have to sit in the front row and get a killer headache.

I wish I had more devil duckies. They're so ridiculously cute!

[Clockwork]

Originally Posted by LaBelleDameSansMerci

Granted. But everyone else is there too, so you have to sit in the front row and get a killer headache.

I wish I had more devil duckies. They're so ridiculously cute!

Granted. An airplane carrying a cargo of devil duckies crashes over your house, effectively destroying it and possibly maiming you; but the crate containing the duckies lands safe on your doorstep.

I wish I had an awesome job testing video games, instead of this horrible job bussing tables.

[LaBelleDameSansMerci]

Yay! Duckies!

Granted, but soon after you get the job, you break your thumbs so badly you can't play video games anymore.

I wish I had a sewing machine.

[Metabolik]

Granted,
But you do such a bad job that Jesus punishes you for bad craftmen ship.

I wish I had a 12 inch penis...

[Aaroneet]

Granted, but then you want a smaller one.

I wish I could have lost more weight.

[biohazard]

Granted, but then you gain back that weight in a few months after losing it.

I wish no one remembered my birthday this year.

[Aaroneet]

Granted, and you begin to feel as though you've begun to be neglected for too long, and search for attention once again.

I wish that my school didn't start tomorrow.

[biohazard]

Granted, but then you have to see more topics in less days, and recieve very intense lessons and work.

I wish corrupted wishes actually became true.

[d.Nox]

Granted, but all the harm the wishes would inflict on the world backfires and creates a horrible paradise full of rainbows and bunny rabbits, where everyone is perky all the time. Gothdom is no more.

I wish I didn't dream of satanic cults hunting me down.

[Reikikuro]

Granted- time ceases for everything else in the universe exept for you. now you have all eternity to work on your blanket in a picture frame world all alone. I hope you have plenty of thread.

I wish I didn't need to go to college for a decent career.

[NachtSorcier]

Granted. Now you've been plunged into the word of Idiocracy, where all you need to be a nuclear physicist is a pencil.

Of course, there are successful people who have nothing more than a high school diploma.

I wish I had some kind of ambition.

[Reikikuro]

I can live with that